How to move on after that ?
by Huddycat
Summary: Season 7 is over, Cuddy and House have to learn how to "move on"
1. Chapter 1

**How to move on after that ?**

_Well, after the finale, after the shock of Lisa's decision to quit House, after all this season which was so full of hope what Huddy concerns, and which then turns to be a "Huddy hell", I wanted to write a new fiction with "my dreams". Here is the first chapter, it begins a week after the finale. I hope you'll enjoy it : )_

Cuddy is in her office at PPTH. One week is already over since House devastated her house. But Cuddy is still shocked. Rachel didn't really understand what happened and Cuddy didn't tell her the truth, she didn't want Rachel to know who made this horrible thing, because she knows how much Rachel cares about House, she knows that her daughter wouldn't believe that her "dad" did such an horrible thing. And Cuddy doesn't want Rachel to get angry at House, to be scared by him. In spite of his crazy, stupid and dangerous act, Cuddy cant' help but keep on carrying, worrying about House and … yes she still loves him, she shouldn't, she wishes she didn't, but she can't help it. After all they went through, after all these years of teasing and bantering, after this fast complete year of dating with him, after all these unforgettable nights with him, how can she simply moves on ? How can people expect that she moves on just like that without thinking things over, without remembering all the good time she had with House? How can Julia think that she could get over him easily now that he's done this! Why can't she understand that she needs time! Instead of leaving her alone she insists that Cuddy dates this guy. But Cuddy hates this guy, it's not his fault, he tries to be nice with her and with Rachel, but … he's not House, he's just a guy, a "normal" guy, a "common" guy, boring, tasteless, not even funny or witty. She misses House so much! Of course he went far too much far this time, she never thought he would hurt her deliberately, she never thought he was so hurt to do so bad things, so horrible things! He could have deeply hurt Rachel or her by driving into her house like that! But she knows why he did it. Wilson explained her what happened just before, he told her how heartbroken House was as he saw her through the window giggling with this guy, how mad he was at her because he had taken a great decision, he wanted to talk to her, he wanted to tell her how lost he was without her, he wanted to tell her how sorry he felt, he probably wanted to ask her to give him another chance, to forgive him, and then he saw her and this guy, and he saw red and certainly didn't realize what he was doing. Why can't she have simple relationship with men, why is it always so complicated? Her mother is maybe right, she probably has "impossible standards", and unless she wants to end her life alone, she has to make a change. But right now, she doesn't have the strength, the will to move on, to go forwards, and she knows she has to. Rachel needs a mother, not a zombie, she deserves a good life, she deserves to be happy. Cuddy looks sadly around her, she loves her office, she loves her job, she fought so hard to be what she is now, one of the few women to run a teaching hospital like the PPTH. She perfectly knows that if she quits this job, she will never find another one like it. And nevertheless it is the only option she has if she really wants to move on and to have a chance to get over him, over their story. She stands up, walks around her desk, and leaves her office. She wants to walk one more time in her hospital, in the different medical departments, but when she arrives in front of the Diagnostic Department and of House's office, she can't go on, she stands there and stares at House's chair, which is empty, just like his office. She remains here a long time, unaware of the people around her, some nurses hesitate to ask her if she needs something or if she feels ok, but they continue their way without disturbing the Dean of Medicine. Her phone rings, it's Marina, she wants to know if Cuddy can be back a little earlier today, because her boyfriend wants to take her to the restaurant.

-It's ok Marina, I'll be there in about 30 minutes, says Cuddy and begins slowly to go back to her office in order to take her bag and then she leaves PPTH.

House is in a small town on the west coast, he has a room in a hotel with view on the ocean, and spends his days in the bar on the beach when he's not walking along the beach, thinking of the recent events, of the crazy thing he did one week ago, of the fact that Cuddy probably hates him now. She looked so scared, so terrified and so fragile when he gave her her brush back. When he looked at her straight in the eyes, he saw a deep fear, she was shaking indeed, but he saw some question and some tenderness too, and he understood how wrong he was, she absolutely didn't care about the other guy, she was still in love with him and as usual he destroyed everything. In the hall of the hospital, when he pushed her against the wall, she was scared but he saw in her eyes that she still cared about him and really wanted to know how he felt, he saw the care and the love in her eyes, he was under the impression she expected him to kiss her with passion, but … he couldn't… he just walked away from her, walked away from the fear to really lose her… He still hoped at this moment that he could find a way to get back at her, to make her forgive him… with time … But now… it is impossible, she would never forgive him, she would never talk with him again, not after what he did… And now what? What should he do? He can't go back to PPTH, she probably called the police and they probably have to look for him, and he really doesn't want to go in jail, he needs time for him, he needs time to think things over, to make a point on his life, to face his own fears, he wants to make a change in his life, and this time he's ready to make a real change, not just a try, this time he has no more choice. Not after what he did to Cuddy. When he remembers the moment when he drove into her house, the awful noise, the shock and then the most painful moment when he saw her shaking, the fear in her eyes, her incredulity when she understood what happened and who provoked this, he feels nauseous, dizzy, he'd like so desperately that all this was only a nightmare, that all this never happened! What has he done? He could have killed her or Rachel! No, he definitely can't go back to PPTH. She would have no choice but to fire him, he has no more job there, no one will hire him, he has to move, so why not here? Furthermore he knows he couldn't live near her without her, he couldn't bear to see her every day without the possibility to talk to her, to tease her like they used to do before, before they dated, before he destroyed her house and at the same time the symbol of their love, of their happiness. Maybe, in ten or twenty years, he'll be able to go back to her and to ask her to forgive him, maybe then they'll have the possibility to be friends again. Maybe…


	2. Chapter 2

_Second chapter_

Cuddy just took Rachel to bed, the little girl has asked one more time if House would be there tomorrow morning when she'll wake up. Cuddy tried to evade her question, but Rachel is stubborn and Cuddy had to tell her that House wasn't there, that he left the town, and Rachel asked why and when her "dad" would be back to play with her and to watch the pirate cartoon with her, and when Cuddy left her bedroom, she heard the little girl speaking to House and asking him to come back because she misses him very much and her mother too. Cuddy is now sitting on her bed, she wanted to work but her mind is obsessed with House and what he's done to her and to Rachel. She knows she never should have taken the "risk" to make out with him, to have a relationship with him, he told her at the end of this "magical day", he told her : "I won't change and I will do horrible things to you again" his words resound in her head, but … she didn't want to believe him, she was so happy, so in love with him, the only thing she wanted at this time was to be with him, to be loved by him, to spend the most possible time with him, in his arms, tasting his lips, breathing him, feeling his body against hers. She refused to think of the consequences, she refused to let him go away one more time, she had waited more than 20 years to be with him! And now, now what? She feels so empty, he left a huge hole in her heart, as huge as the hole in her living-room that he made with his car. And unaware of it, she begins to shake more and more violently, and finally she bursts in tears. She cries a long time, and she's still crying when the phone rings.

-Lisa Cuddy, she says with some sobs in the voice.

-Lisa? It's Julia, what happens, you seem heart-struck! Are you ok?

-Yes, I'm fine, I'm just tired, don't worry. What do you want?

-Lisa, I know you, you're lying, I can hear in your voice that you're not ok. Talk to me, Lisa, tell me what's wrong.

-Julia, if you want or need something, tell me, otherwise leave me alone, I don't want to talk, … about anything. Can you understand?

-Well, I … ok, but if you need to talk or something, you know I'm here…

-Yeah, I know, good night. And Cuddy hangs up. She knows she wasn't very kind with Julia, but she thinks that Julia has a part of responsibility to what happened last week. If she hadn't insisted to have lunch with Lisa and this guy from the coffee shop, nothing would have ever happened. At least not this horrible and scary thing. And maybe she could have find a way to talk to House and to get things better between them, Wilson told her House had decided to make things change, in a good way, he told her that House was willing to make amend to her and to win another chance with her. And she believes it, in the hall, when House pushed her against the wall, he told her it wasn't her fault, and before in his hospital room, he told her he was wishing they could at least be back at the point they were before they started dating each other, with the teasers, the banters… the "old good time" to say the least. But she knows, and she knows that he knows too, that a simple back to "old good time" isn't realistic, not after all they went through together, not after all these wonderful nights… after these tender moments they had together… It's time to move on, to get over this beautiful but sad story, to find some peace, to try to live… to take a new start. And to manage to do it, she and Rachel have to move in another town, in another state… She gives herself two weeks to find the right place, and then no more hesitation, they'll leave this place and all the memories which are associated to it. Yes, that's the right thing to do, as someone used to say.

-Hey, Mister, do you want another drink?

-What?

-Do you want another drink? Your glass is empty.

House looks at his glass, then at the barman and nods. He needs one more cocktail to keep the pain away, to think rational however paradoxical it can appear. If he intends to settle himself here, he has to find a hospital where he can work. He turns to the barman and asks him:

-Is there a hospital here?

-A hospital? Are you feeling bad?

-No, no, I'm fine, I'm a doctor and I search a job, House replies.

-I understand, says the barman, you won't have the choice, there is only one hospital in this town, you can't miss it, go to the west and you'll find it, it's a brand new hospital, the old one has burnt 2 years ago.

- Thanks for the information, House says. After all, he has maybe a good star which watches over him. When he came here, he had no idea what he was doing, he really thought to stay here for one, maybe two weeks, and then to move in a big city. Now he could stay longer. Yup, tomorrow he'll go to this hospital and try to get a job there. He'll try to be a "good doctor", to be a "good employee", to behave like a responsible adult, and maybe in one year he can go back to Cuddy and prove her that he had changed, that he's now someone on who she can count, and then … if he's patient enough he can get back at her and win her heart again… But he knows that to be able to change for Cuddy, he has first to fight his own fears, his pain, not only the physical pain, but also the psychological pain. And that will be one of the great challenges of his new life. But it's the price to pay to have a tiny chance to go back together with Cuddy, to be with his only love. If Wilson were there with him, he'd probably tell him that's the first step on this hard road, an important step. But unfortunately Wilson is not here and House misses his friend and his advices. He can maybe call him…

-Mama! Mama!

-Rachel! What do you want, little shrimp? says Cuddy in a soft voice.

-I want to see House! We go to him! answers the little girl with a big smile and while jumping on her bed.

Cuddy looks at her, she can't tell her the truth, it would break her little heart, she has to protect her from pain and from the cruel adult's world.

-Rachel, sweety, you know that mommy has to work, I'll tell Marina to go to the park with you so you can play with your friends, she says and smiles to her daughter.

-No, I want House, I want Dad! Rachel keeps saying and jumping.

-Ok, I promise you we'll go to see him soon, but not today. Be a good girl and mommy will bring you a little surprise, ok?

The child stops jumping and looks at her mother. She is young but like every child she feels when her mother lies, when her mother is sad.

-Mommy, where is House? why you are sad? she says and stares at Cuddy.

-I'm not sad, Rachel, lies Cuddy, Mommy has a lot of work and is a little tired, but don't worry, everything will be good. And she caresses Rachel's head and gives her a kiss. Com'on, Rachel, let's have breakfast, Marina will arrive soon.

And indeed, 5 minutes later Marina comes in the kitchen.

-Good morning, Doctor Cuddy, hello Rachel!

-Good morning, Marina. I have to go now, I have an important meeting this morning, see you, Cuddy says and leaves her house.

-Marina, Rachel says.

-Yes, do you want something? Marina asks and sits near the little girl.

-I have a secret, Rachel whispers.

-Oh really, Marina whispers her back. And do you want to share it with me?

Rachel looks seriously at Marina. After a few seconds, she seems to have taken a decision.

-Yes, but don't tell mommy, it's a surprise.

-I swear! Marina answers and raises her right hand.

-Mommy is sad, Dad is not here, I want to see him, I want him, Rachel says and shows the telephone to Marina. Please, and she gives her the telephone.

Marina looks the girl, surprised. She doesn't know what to do. The Doctor Cuddy explained her briefly the situation, but Marina thinks that Rachel is right: both of them, the mother and the child, need this man, how crazy he may be. Marina saw Cuddy and House together, she saw the love between them, and then the pain they felt after the break up, but it's not her business. She doesn't want to intervene in Doctor Cuddy's private life. But she must admit though that she understands what Rachel feels, the little girl has no more dad now, and her mother works a lot and late. Rachel's face breaks her heart and she decides to do what the child wants.

-Ok, Rachel, I call Doctor House, but that will be our secret, you mustn't tell your mommy, you promise?

-Yes! I promise, says Rachel with a big smile and a finger on her mouth.

-So, what do you want to tell Doctor House?

-I want him, I want him to play with me and to watch Scallywag, mommy doesn't want.

-Ok, we tell him that, Marina says and takes the phone.

-And …, Rachel adds.

-And? asks Marina, surprised.

-And mommy is sad, says Rachel seriously.

-Ok.

Marina looks into Cuddy's phone book and finds House's number. Should I really do it or should I just pretend to do it? Marina hesitates, but the hope she sees in Rachel's eyes gives her the courage to dial House's number. They wait but no one answers, and then they hear the answering machine and House's voice : "Hi, you're on the phone of Gregory House, I can't answer you right now, but leave me a message, biiiiip".

-Hi, Dad, I want you, mommy is sad, come home! says Rachel, disappointed because her dad doesn't speak to her.

-We'll try again later, ok Rachel, Marina says. Do you want to cook some cookies?


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3_

House listens to Rachel's message and his heart squeezes. He listens to it again and again. He feels so sorry for the little girl. If someone had told him that he would bond with the child, he would have never believed it, but the fact is that he really cares about the little girl, sometimes, in his head, he calls her his little princess. When he saw who was calling him, his heart began to beat faster, his hands became sweat, he didn't know what to do. He isn't ready to talk to Cuddy yet, he needs some more time. He had to make a big effort to not answer, because he desperately needs her, he needs to hear her voice… And now, after listening to the message, he feels worse. He never thought Rachel could miss him so much to call him, Cuddy probably didn't tell her what he has done. Why? To protect Rachel, certainly, but … yeah, that must be the reason why she didn't tell Rachel, she's so protective with her… it's probably not because of him and what he is for Rachel, a kind of dad… He remembers that at the beginning of their relationship she didn't introduce him to Rachel and her argument was that she needed to protect her, but from what? From him? From his childish behavior? Or from a possible "break up"? And then, when he made her remark that she was sailing back just like him from a real and deep relationship, then, she agreed to let him approach Rachel, to let him know Rachel… And contrary to all expectations, he got very well with the little girl. House remembers the time when he learned Rachel how to play "feed the monkey", just to get her ready for the preschool test – it was so important to Cuddy, she was so proud of her daughter - and at the end of the test, when the teacher told them that Rachel was very smart, then Cuddy asked her if she had already played to "feed the monkey", the little girl answered her mother with a so lovely, innocent face "no", then looked at House with some complicity in the eyes, House felt so proud of her, he had a secret with the little girl! He couldn't help but to tell then his patient in the clinic duty, and he must have been very enthusiastic because the patient thought he was talking about his child. That was a good time, a happy time… And now all this is so far, it seems to be just a dream… He misses Rachel… What can he do? Just call her, tell her that everything is ok? He doesn't even know what Cuddy told the little girl to explain her the huge hole in the living-room, the absence of House… He tries to imagine a plausible explanation, but … how to be sure that Cuddy would have given her the same? Of course, he could call Cuddy and ask her, but she'll want to know why he asks such a thing, he's sure that Cuddy doesn't know that Rachel called him. So if he calls her about Rachel, she will probably fear that he tries something against Rachel, maybe that he could kidnap her… No, no, she can't imagine such a horrible thing, he's too depressed to think rational, he needs to calm down and to focus on something else. But what? He suddenly understands that Cuddy, Rachel, Wilson are all his life, he needs them, he's lost without them. What can he do to make things better? How can they forgive him? Will he be able to forgive himself? He probably has to find someone to help him dealing with all this crap, maybe… Nolan? After all he's a good therapist, and he's a doctor so he has to respect the medical confidentiality. But will he accept to treat House per phone?

Cuddy gets out the meeting room, she needs some quiet place, the negotiation with the insurances was rather hard, but she obtained eventually what she wanted. Instead of going back to her office, she goes to Wilson's office, she needs to talk to someone who worries about House like she does.

-Wilson, do you have a moment? she asks.

-Yes, of course, Cuddy, come in. Is there a problem? Wilson replies and looks at her, trying to guess why she comes.

-No, not really, just the usual work with the usual difficulties, nothing more, it's just that…, she says and walks around in the room.

-Excuse me, but you … seem upset and worried. Do you want to talk about something?

-I'm tired, Wilson, my house is destroyed, it will take months to "repair" it and I… I can't wait so long, she says and finally sits down.

Wilson wonders why she can't wait, she effectively seems tired, she lost some weigh, she's pale… but she doesn't tell him everything.

-Cuddy, I understand that you are living very hard times, a lot of events have happened, and …

-Wilson! Do you know where he is? she exclaims suddenly, and some tears begin to roll on her cheeks.

-You mean, where is House? That's what you ask me?

-Yes, Wilson, I know it's crazy but I'm worried about him, no one saw him, he called no one, he simply disappeared and … and I'm worried, she says in a low voice.

Wilson looks at her, he feels so sorry for her, how can she still worry about a man who drove into her living-room and who could have hurt her, even killed her?

-Cuddy, you … you shouldn't worry about him, not after what he's done to you, he could have killed you! Wilson replies.

-I know! Cuddy shouts, and she wipes the tears on her cheeks, but new tears replace them immediately. I know, I shouldn't care about him, but … I love him, Wilson, do you understand?

-Cuddy, I … I don't know what to say or what to do, I … I know you love him, and I know he … loves you… he needs you, but … I really don't know where he is. I'm worried too, I called him every day, I went several times to his apartment, I even asked Dominica, but she has no idea where he can be, and … to tell the truth I don't think that it worries her a lot…

Wilson stands up and nears Cuddy, she stands up and he takes her in his arms to comfort her, Cuddy bursts in tears, and Wilson sits with her on the couch of his office. Where are you House? he wonders, she needs you! You have to be there to comfort her, it's not my role, she doesn't need me, she needs you, you idiot! After a while, Cuddy calms down and says:

-Thank you, Wilson, I'm sorry, you don't have to … do this, but you're the only one who worries about House here, you're the only one to know a lot about House, about me…

-Don't worry, Cuddy, I'm your friend, … and House's friend too, I'll always be there for both of you, no matter what happens, you both are my friends.

Cuddy looks at him and smiles a little. I know, Wilson. Then she stands up.

-Hm, Cuddy?

-Yes?

-May I ask you something?

-Of course, she answers puzzled.

-You said that it will take several months to repair your house and then that you can't wait so long, why?

-Why what?

-Why can't you wait? You can all the same live in your house, of course you have no more living-room, but… so why? repeats Wilson and looks at her in the eyes.

-I … well, I think you'll figure it out soon, … and it's better if I tell you… you're my friend so…

-What? What do you have to tell me, Cuddy? asks Wilson, worried.

-I …, Cuddy takes a deep breath and says rapidly I want to move in another city, in another state. Then she stares at Wilson and waits for his reaction.

-Wha… What? Are you kidding? You want to move? But… your job! You'll never find another one like it! And what about us? I mean what about the PPTH? And … and if House comes back? Did you think of all the consequences? says Wilson, shocked.

-Wilson, I … I had thought about all this, about all what happened this last year in my life, and … and I came to the conclusion that if I wanted to move on I had to leave from here, I can't stay here, I have too much memories here…

-Do you remember when Amber dies? says Wilson in a low voice and looks through the window to House's balcony. Cuddy nods and he keeps on talking. Do you remember what you told me then?

-Yes, but it's not the same, she replies in the same ton of voice.

-Of course, it's the same situation! says Wilson and turns to her. Except that House isn't dead! Well for what I know, he's still alive. And you have no right to give up the wonderful love you share with him. I know he went far too far this time, you may never forgive him for what he's done to you and to Rachel, but … but he has extenuating circumstances! HE LOVES YOU! And when he saw you with this guy he … he can't help but do something crazy! And you know that, you know that you have a part of responsibility in this tragic event, in the break up and in his stupid behavior after you dumped him.

-Wilson! says Cuddy frightened, do you mean I'm the only responsible for all this crap, for House's self-destructive behavior? Cuddy can't believe what Wilson said.

-No, Cuddy, of course not. Don't get me wrong, House can be a real jerk, his behavior was stupid and what he's done with the car is … completely crazy and I will understand that you can't forgive him, but … When Amber dies, I wanted to leave my job, to leave this town, I thought it was the only way to forget all the good time I spent with her, the only way to get over her, over us… And then you, and House, told me that I was wrong, that the memories will always remain in my head wherever I can go, her face, her smell, her skin, her kiss… all these memories are forever in me, in my head, in my body, you told me that to start again somewhere else won't help me because my friends were here, and when such a dramatic event happens, you need to have your friends near you… that's what I want you to remember, that's what I want you to think about. And you have the chance that you still have the hope to see him again one day, maybe to get back at him… With time, everything is possible, as long as both of you are alive… and still deeply in love with each other, don't give up Cuddy, please, don't give up. There's still a chance… But if you leave this town and your job … How can he find you? How can he then ask you to forgive him? How can you both have a real discussion?

-I … I don't think we are in the same situation as you were… Neither you, nor Amber hurt the other one like House and I did, I know I'm not perfect, Wilson, my mother may even be right when she told me that I'm an idiot with impossible standards, but… it's just what it is, it's the life. House and I are two screwed up people who tried to have a "normal" relationship, a "normal" life, but we just can't… And I have to think about Rachel, she's young, she deserves to be happy…

-Yeah, you're right, Rachel deserves to be happy and you can't deny the fact that she's really attached to House, that she loves him like a child may love a father! Cuddy, I'm sure that one day House will come back here, maybe in one week, maybe in one month, maybe in one year, but he will come back because you are his family, you are his world! Think, please, about all the consequences, about what I tell you before you take your decision.

-I've already thought about all this, Wilson, and I have taken my decision. I am going to put back my resignation in the afternoon and I'll leave in two weeks, she says in a low voice, without looking at Wilson.

-So I can't convince you to stay?

-No. I have to move, for Rachel, for me and … for House.

-Ok, so I wish you good luck, Cuddy, and I hope that we'll stay in contact, I'll miss you, Wilson says and gives her a hug.

-Thank you, Wilson. We stay in contact, and … if you have any news about him, just tell me.

-I promise.


	4. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4_

Wilson is in his office. He thinks about what Cuddy said and about her decision to leave, he feels sad because he didn't manage to convince her to go back over her decision, and he's convinced that she makes a big mistake because he knows that Cuddy loves her job. She's deeply hurt and emotionally too much involved to think rational and as a friend it was his duty to help her to make such a decision, to think about the best for her and for Rachel, and he fails. Suddenly his phone rings. When Wilson sees who is calling, he hesitates to pick up. What does House want? What should he tell him? And Wilson can't help picking up, he's too worried about his friend, about Cuddy.

-House! Where are you? What do you want? Why are you calling?

-Hi, Wilson, I can't tell you and … I'm not sure to know, House says, surprised by the questioning of his friend.

-House! Do you realize what you made? You could have hurt her, or worse killed her? Are you crazy?

-I … I know, Wilson, but … I couldn't help it!

-No, of course, we have to find you some excuse for behaving like the most stupid man! And then, you disappear, just like that! Don't you think that we were worried about you? How can you simply go away, without any excuse, any regret? You really went too far this time, how can you expect Cuddy to forgive you? Or I? I broke my wrist to avoid your car, you silly man!

-Wilson! Stop it, please! I know I really went too far, I know I really screw up this time, I understand if you or … Cuddy can't forgive me, can't forgive what I've done, but… I need help, Wilson, and … I hope that my best friend is still my best friend and that he'll be willing to help me, one more time…

-…

-Wilson? Are you still here?

-Yes, I'm here, House, you know that I'll always be here for you, even if you don't deserve it.

-I'm … I'm really sorry for your wrist, I hope you'll be soon better.

-Thank you, but why are you calling me? You said that you need help, but you refuse to tell me where you are, so what do you expect from me?

-I … well, first of all, I want to apologize… And … I'm in a little town, I'm gonna try to find a job, to find some peace with myself, to make a point on my life, to deal with my … problems, but…

-But you're aware that you can't do it alone, am I wrong? And you want me to help you, but you won't listen to my advice as usual and everything will start again like in the past!

-No, no, I know that I can't deal with my fears, with Cuddy's loss alone, I know that I need help, I know I can't ask you to help me this time because it's too much, but I need you as my friend, as someone with who I can talk… about some personal subjects…

-Like about Cuddy?

-Yeah, because I suppose that she's devastated, that she's mad and angry at me, that she never wants to see me again… how can I blame her? adds House in a low and sad voice. But … I hope you can give me some news about her, and about Rachel.

-Maybe… And for your other "problems"? How do you mean to solve them?

-I think I'll ask Nolan, what do you think about this idea? Do you think he'll accept to treat me?

-Well, you have to ask him. But if he refuses, I can give you the name of my therapist.

-Thank you Wilson…. How is Cuddy? Is she alright?

-House! How do you think she is? You drove into her living-room! She's scared, shocked, angry and …

-And? House asks, feeling that his love isn't so mad at him as he thought.

-And she's worried about you! Don't ask me why she still cares about you after what you've done to her, but it's a fact, she still cares about you!

-I see several reasons for this, but I'm a gentleman and I can't reveal my lady's secrets, says House with a smile. And… You still care about me too, Wilson, because you're my friend, because I'm your friend.

-Yes, you're probably right, House, it's so and we can change nothing to it. But…

-But?

-I don't know if I should tell you…

-Tell me what Wilson? House says with some fear in the voice. Is it about Cuddy? Is she hurt or ill? Tell me! House shouts worried.

-No, she's physically alright.

-And Rachel?

-Rachel too, why do you worry about her? I thought you found her boring?

-Don't care about what I think, just tell me what's wrong with Cuddy.

-She leaves the PPTH.

-….

-House? House! Do you hear me?

-Yes, I hear you, House whispers. Why does she leave? Did she find another job? Wilson, you must talk to her and convince her that she makes a big mistake! This job is all for her, she worked so hard to arrive there!

-What do you think, House? Don't you think that I've already tried to make her change her decision? But she's stubborn, like someone else I know, and when she decides something, then… it's almost impossible to change her mind. But I suppose you know.

-Yeah, I know…

-YOU, you can maybe make her change her mind!

-Wilson, don't be stupid! She doesn't to talk to me anymore, she certainly doesn't listen to me!

-Yes, you're right.

-Do you know where she's going to move? Or if she has already found a new job?

-No, I don't know, I don't think she knows herself.

-Good…, House replies and Wilson knows that his friend thinks about something, he can imagine the expression on House's face, this expression he has when he suddenly finds the solution of a puzzle.

-House? You got an idea, I can hear it at your voice, Wilson says. What are you thinking of?

-I can't tell you right now, but I promise I'll explain you when I'll have more information. Just try to keep her indecisive as for her destination and her new job!

-How?

-I don't know, steal her schedule, her phonebook, keep her busy with some problems at the hospital! I'm sure you'll find something, I need one, maybe two days, then I'll call you and we'll make a plan. See ya, Wilson!

-House? He has hang up!

House smiles, after all Cuddy's decision to leave the PPTH isn't too bad, on the contrary it can be a very good thing for him and for his future…


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter 5 : Well first of all, I know nothing about Aptos, I imagine this town to fit with my story-arc, nothing more, all is imagination. And second point, the timeline is very short and I'm fully aware that it takes more time to hire someone, but it's a fiction! Be indulgent, it's for the story ; )_

It's the end of the afternoon but after what Wilson told him about Cuddy, House decided that he has to go to this hospital immediately, he can't wait for the next day. And he's now waiting to be received by the man who temporarily acts as director.

-Doctor House, says a man of about 50 years, you want to talk to me?

-Yes, Doctor … ?

-Doctor Malcolm, answers the man and holds out to him the hand. Follow me, please, and he goes in his office.

-Doctor Malcolm, I've decided to settle myself in this town and I'd like to work in your hospital.

-Well, can you give me some reasons why a famous and brilliant doctor wants to work here? It's a small town, of course we have rather a rich and old population and a military-industrial complex which is rapidly growing, but our hospital isn't really big and I don't think that we have cases which can interest you.

-Don't worry, there's always interesting cases, and I need some rest and quiet time, I'd like to spend more time with my family, replies House with a smile.

-Oh, I didn't know that you have a family…

-I don't like to speak a lot about my private life, but you seem to be someone I can trust, so I can tell you… I have a wife and … a little girl. And I want to see my little princess growing, so … I think it would be great for me to work here, the town seems to be quiet, with good schools…, House says and looks for the approval of his interlocutor.

-Yes, you're right, it's a good place to raise a child, my wife works in the best school of the town, I'll give you the name, so you can enroll your daughter… Malcolm takes a few minutes to think over and then he tells House : "Well, we'll be very happy and proud to have a so brilliant diagnostician working in our hospital… I'll have to talk about you to our board of directors, but you can already consider as hired!" Of course, in the small medical world, House is known to be a genius, but also a manipulator without morality and ready for everything. Such a man can be dangerous but also very attractive for the hospital, he's famous and that's why Malcolm is sure that the board of directors will approve his choice.

-Great, thank you. I'm sure you're a good director! House says and looks at Malcolm straight in the eyes.

- In reality I am only the temporary director, the former director is retired when the hospital burned, and we haven't found anybody yet who made the unanimity… and as no one wants to do it and as the older doctor to work here, I can't refuse doing it … but I don't really like running such an establishment…

-May I ask you why? House says, interested.

-Because the paperwork takes me all my time, I hardly can do my doctor-job! And I miss it. I love my job, I mean my real job, I like saving life and healing people when I can, I like relieving people's pains… Paperwork is boring and sometimes some laws are hard to understand… but I have to be patient, one day we'll find the right person to run this hospital. I just hope soon, very soon!

-I can help you, replies House with some light of hope in the eyes. I know the perfect person to do this job.

-Really? asks Malcolm and sits up straight, suddenly interested. He sees an opportunity there to leave this director's role, because he has no doubt that House knows someone who'll perfectly fit for the job and that House has a big interest to see this person at the head of the hospital. He just needs to know who this person is and why House wants to see him or her here.

-Yes, but we have to be very careful and act subtlety. Do you play the game with me? It will be win-win for both of us…, says House and stares at Malcolm, certain that the man will agree.

After a few minutes of thinking, Malcolm exclaims: Hi five, House!

House smiles, he feels happy. After all, this time the chance seems to turn in his favor.

-How do you plan this … "game"? asks Malcolm.

-I think that we have to act like this …

When Cuddy arrives at her home this evening, she still doesn't know where she and Rachel are going to move. She has begun to look for some job in different towns, but nothing has really interested her. She's thinking of it while watching Rachel who plays. The little girl stares suddenly at her and says "Aptos"!

-What did you say, Rachel? asks Cuddy surprised.

-Aptos, Aptos, Aptos! repeats the little girl and smiles.

-Aptos? What's this? A game? A cartoon?

-Aptos town! Aptos town!

Cuddy looks at Rachel, amazed. Curious to see if what the little girl says has a meaning, she takes her laptop and searches "Aptos". And when she sees the results of her research, she's very surprised and even amused. Could it be a sign of the fate? She looks at Rachel who is now jumping everywhere in her room and keeps on saying "Aptos town". Then Cuddy decides to look for more information about this small town in California. Why not going there? It would be a great change in their life and a new start in a place far away from here, and with a more pleasant climate… Yes, she has to think seriously about it. Maybe not in this city in particular, but in the region. However, Cuddy would like to know how Rachel found this name, she has to ask Marina tomorrow.

The next day, when Cuddy arrives in her office, she finds Wilson who's waiting for her.

-Good Morning, Wilson, what's the problem?

-Good Morning, Cuddy. Why do you think that there is a problem?

Cuddy stares at him, puzzled. I think you have a problem because you're in my office at 7.30 am. So why would you be there so early in the morning if there wasn't any problem?

-Oh, I … no, I haven't any problem, everything is good, I …

-Do you have any news from House? she suddenly says, full of hope.

-Hm, no, no, Wilson says and blushes. I …

-Wilson, for God's sake! What do you want? I have a lot to do, so please… tell me what you want to tell me and leave my office so I can work!

-I … I'd like to ask you to have lunch with me today, Wilson replies.

Cuddy looks at him, surprised. Well, ok, we can have lunch together today, but … are you sure that you're ok?

-Yes, yes, I'm fine, see ya, and Wilson leaves Cuddy's office.

Well, I hope she really has a lot of work to do, because I don't know how I can keep her busy so that she can't look for a job until House calls me, thinks Wilson. How does House always manage to lead him to do such tricks? I hope he's got a great plan…

Cuddy is working when a fax comes. She looks at it rapidly but a name draws her attention: Hospital of Aptos, that's where the fax comes from. Cuddy is curious to see what the fax is about, it's the second time within 24 hours that she hears the name of this city. It's really weird…, she thinks. Let's see what is written. Cuddy begins to read the fax and she can't believe it: they need a director to run their brand new hospital and have heard that she just resigned. Cuddy knows that the medical world is a small world, but she'd never thought it was so small that such a hospital already knows that she resigned yesterday. It's really very weird… But she is determined to take some time to think of this offer, it can be a real chance to start a new life… She really has to get more information about this city and this hospital.

Wilson tries to find some new ideas to keep Cuddy busy when his cell phone finally rings.

-House! I hope you have a plan, because I don't know how to distract Cuddy!

-Hey! I could give you some good tips, but… they wouldn't be suited, except if you intend to ask Cuddy out.

-House! Don't be stupid! Do you have a plan?

-Yes! A simple, but subtle plan! All you have to do is to listen carefully to me.

-Ok, explain to me!

-Cuddy! Are you ready? asks Wilson as he opens Cuddy's door.

-Yes, I'm coming! Let's go!

Wilson and Cuddy are sitting and wait for their command: Cuddy orders a "Chief salad" and Wilson a cheeseburger.

-So, why do you want to have lunch with me? Why today? Cuddy asks.

-I just think that you need to change your mind and to go out of the hospital…, Wilson replies.

-I see… If House was still there, I'd say you have the mission to keep me out of the hospital while he's doing a crazy or a stupid thing, but as he's not there… I'm running out of ideas! … Wilson, do you know Aptos? It's a little town in California…

-Aptos? Well, I know that there is a military-industrial complex which is rapidly expanding, and that there's a brand new hospital with the last medical technologies, and that they intend to develop a research center and maybe in the longer term a Med-School. Why do you ask me that? Wilson says with an innocent face.

Cuddy looks at him, she's stunned. Wilson! How do you know all this about a so small city? she exclaims.

-Oh, I remember an article that I read one or two weeks ago. I was wondering if I can go there, I want to move on, just like you and… this place sounds good! he adds and smiles. But why do you ask me, are you interested to move there?

-Well, I received a fax this morning and they offer me to run the hospital, she says and looks at Wilson, straight in the eyes.

-Oh, great! And are you going to accept it?

-I have to think about it, but …

-But? Wilson asks and stares at her.

-It's a little weird.

-What? That they want you to run their hospital? You're one of the most famous Dean of Medicine…

-No, yes, but … yesterday Rachel said the name of this town, and this morning I've been offered a job there, and a good job, an interesting job… All this in a time so short, admit that it's suspicious, she replies and scrutinizes Wilson's face.

-Why are you looking at me like that? I know nothing about it!

-Are you sure? Can you look at me in the eyes and tell me that's not a new House's trick?

-Cuddy, do you really think he can do this? We don't even know where he is! Wilson says and looks her in the face.

After a few seconds, Cuddy answers: No, you're right, I probably imagine all this, but you know… after all these years past next to him… I think I become a little paranoid, she says and smiles.

Wilson heaves a discreet sigh of relief, Cuddy was about to uncover the mystery…


	6. Chapter 6

_Chapter 6_

-Well, Doctor House, how was your first day in our hospital? asks Doctor Malcolm.

-Good…, yeah, I think it was good. I settled down in my office, I made the tour of the establishment, got acquainted with some colleagues...

-I'm happy that everything is ok.

-Hm, Doctor Malcolm, have you got any news about our … "game", House asks and puts quotation marks in the word game with hands.

-Well I sent her the fax this morning, but I have no answer yet, maybe tomorrow…

-Yes, maybe … See you tomorrow, says House and leaves the hospital.

Once in his apartment, he calls Wilson.

-Wilson? What's up in PPTH? Did you talk to Cuddy today about our plan?

-Yes, yes I did it.

-And? How did she react? Was she interested?

-House, of course, she's interested!

-But…?

-But she wants to think about it more deeply…

-Did you tell her what I've told you to tell her?

-Of course, I did! And that made her suspicious, she was puzzled that I know all this about such a small hospital, If you really want to know.

-So she is interested, says House and smiles.

-Yes, I think she'll accept the job.

- And she thinks that I could be behind all this…

-Yes, she was about to uncover the mystery, but I managed to convince her that it would be insane.

-Great Wilson! Well played! My lady is very smart…, adds House and Wilson can imagine the face of his friend shining with happiness and with pride.

-Yes and that also means that she still thinks about you…, Wilson adds. And how was your first day as new doctor?

-Not very interesting, but I behaved like a good employee and I tried to be kind with my colleagues, you see? I make efforts to become integrated!

-I hope you'll find your place in this hospital and a balance in your life, House. … You know what?

-No, what?

-I miss you! I wait every second to see you pass my door, walk into my office without knocking and ask me something. And… and you don't come… And I feel a void…

-Really? I thought you were done with me because of my stupid, dangerous and crazy behavior…

-House! You know what I mean! I'm your best friend and you're my best friend! I have nothing more here, I think I'm gonna move to.

-Why don't you come here? Oncologists are always needed everywhere…

-And so you can have me to protect you against yourself and to give you some advices that you won't follow! Wilson replies and smiles.

-And I can give you some advices too and puts you in some intriguing, embarrassing situations… And when you saw the guys here, you'll understand that we can have a lot of fun with them, I'm sure we can plan some good tricks… They are so serious! So, are you convinced? Will you come and settle yourself here?

-Well, I have to think about it, I know that the hospital in Seattle needs someone to run their Oncology Department and …

-Wilson! You won't go to Seattle? The climate is better here! And I'm here! And Cuddy will be here too! We can re-form our "golden trio"!

-That's the point, House! I need to move on in my life, I need some changes, I hope to find love… but if I stay with you, I … I'll keep on watching over you and I won't take time for me, for my own life…

-I see…, House says sadly. Do what you have to do, Wilson, you're right, it's time for you to think about your own life and about what you want and what you need. Furthermore, I also have to face my devils alone, to face my personal challenges alone, otherwise I won't move on in my life. And I'm decided to get through this in order to get Cuddy back at me. But… I miss you too, Wilson…

-House, I … I don't know what to say. Maybe I won't go to Seattle, I just want to think about it… so to have no regret…

-Well, thanks for your help and tell me what Cuddy decides to do…

-You're welcome, and ok, I tell you.

-And… how is she?

-Cuddy?

-No, the queen of Alabama! Of course, Cuddy!

-She's … she's fine, I think. A little tired and lost, but she's strong, she'll go through it.

-And does she talk about me?

-Yes, she's worried.

-Just worried? …. And Rachel?

-Rachel? I … I don't know, I think she's fine, Cuddy doesn't talk about her…

-Can you ask her if Rachel is fine, if she … Forget it, call me when you learn something new.

-I'll do it.

-Cuddy! Are you kidding? Julia asks.

-No, I've thought a lot about it, and I think it's a good decision, Cuddy says and looks at her sister. They are in Cuddy's room. Cuddy has begun to pack her clothes, she has already put those of Rachel in boxes. Julia, I ask you to come to help me, the removal men have to pass in 10 days to embark everything and I hardly began to pack our affairs! And with all the work I have at the hospital I hoped I could count on an effective help of your part. Not to lecture me and try to make me change my mind!

-Of course, I will help you, but can't we just talk about it before? I mean… it's so sudden! Are you sure of what you're doing? Are you sure it's what you and Rachel need?

-Julia! Shut up and help me! says Cuddy in a cold but firm voice, and gives her sister a severe glance.

-Ok. But may I ask you why this city? I haven't heard of it before you mention it? Do you think the job which they propose you will be also interesting, so fascinating and prestigious as this one?

-Julia, I don't know, they propose me to run their hospital, that's exactly what I was doing here! answers Cuddy annoyed. Can you please shut up and help me to put my clothes in boxes?

-And did you tell our mother? says Julia while putting Cuddy's clothes in some boxes.

-Not yet.

-And when do you plan to tell her?

-I don't know, maybe next week. No, not this skirt, I need it, just take the clothes of this cupboard, thanks.

-And Rachel? What did you tell her?

Cuddy stops doing what she's doing and looks at Julia. I … I just told her we … go on holidays…, then Cuddy looks down and goes out of the room. I'm coming with new boxes, she shouts from the corridor. Julia is amazed, she still doesn't understand why her sister takes a so sudden decision, why should it be so fast? She's convinced that Cuddy hides her something, but what? In fact, Cuddy told Rachel that they're going to see House. The little girl really misses him, she asks everyday about him, "Mommy, when comes House? When I play with Dad? Where is Dad? Rachel wants House!". Cuddy doesn't know what to say, she tries every time to distract Rachel with some other things, but every evening, when she puts the little girl to bed, Rachel repeats the same questions. And Cuddy told her they're going to see House soon, to have a rest with it, Rachel was so happy! She hopes Rachel will have so much things to discover in their new house, in their new city that she'll eventually forget House. And Cuddy doesn't know why, but she has the feeling that they are going to see House again, she knows not when, neither how, nor where, nor why, but this feeling doesn't leave her. And somehow, it makes her happy.

The next day, Cuddy is really busy at the hospital. She has to explain everything to her replacement who has to arrive in the morning to get acquainted with the functioning of the PPTH and she's preparing a summary of the essential points when Wilson crosses the door of her office.

-Hey, Cuddy! So, what did you decide to do?

-Good morning, Wilson, she says and looks at him. I … I've decided to accept the job in Apton, she adds and waits for Wilson's reaction.

-Oh, great! he answers and has difficulty in holding the smile which is outlined on his lips.

-So you think I made the right choice, Cuddy replies. She noticed Wilson's smile and adds : Why are you so … happy?

-Happy? Well, not especially. I'll miss you, like everyone here, Cuddy.

-Wilson… You're smiling since I told you I accept the job…

-No, no, I'm not smiling, Wilson tries to defend himself.

-Wilson… We are friends since a long time ago, I know you…, Cuddy says and bits her lips while looking at Wilson straight in the eyes.

-Hm, no, I … I … I'm just happy for you, you … seem to be … more relax and happier, and… I like seeing my friend happy, that's it! I assure you!

-We'll talk about this later…

-Ok! I suppose you have a lot to do, so I'm going now… See ya…

-See ya, Wilson… and, she says as Wilson is about to go out of her office

-And?

-And thank House for me, she adds with a beautiful smile.

Wilson is amazed and looks at her, how did she know? he wonders. Then he leaves her office, still puzzled.


	7. Chapter 7

_Chapter 7_

-House, it's me, Wilson. Call me back when you get this message, I've got good news for you.

Wilson is at the same time happy and worried for his two friends. He doesn't want to think about it, about Cuddy's reaction when she'll see House in Apton and understand he's behind all this… Although the Apton's hospital really needs someone to run it… This is not a House's trick, it's the truth. Fortunately. But Wilson is also convinced that Cuddy is not taken in by that. She knows something, otherwise why would she have told Wilson to thank House for her? How could she know? She'll never stop surprising him. And I? What am I going to do now? Should I stay here at PPTH and keep on running the Oncology Department? Or should I move? What do I want? … If House was there, I could ask him advice, we could speak about it, weigh up the pros and the cons… Maybe… maybe I could ask Cuddy, after all she's my friend too. And Wilson goes to Cuddy's office. She's working at her desk, but she seems to be alone, her replacement certainly left.

-Hey Cuddy, everything's ok? Is your replacement ready?

-Wilson? You again! Well, I hope he'll be ready in 8 days…

- May I ask you some advices, Wilson says and sits in front of her.

- I suppose I have no choice but listen to you, she replies and looks at him.

-Cuddy, I … I made the point of my life, I see you and House moving on, and …

-And you wonder if you have to move on too? Am I wrong?

-No, you're right, and I'd like to talk about it … with you. I need someone to talk with.

-House is not here, so … What do you really want Wilson?

-I … I think I want what everyone wants, love, happiness, a good and interesting job… a family.

-That wasn't really my question, Wilson. Do you want to stay here or do you need to change everything in your life?

-I don't know, Cuddy. My job is good, I've got kind colleagues, but … but I'm alone, Sam left, House left and now you… I'm not sure I want to stay here alone, without my friends, without my family… because you and House are my family. Cuddy, what do you think I should do?

-I don't know Wilson. … Do you have any idea where you can go if you leave PPTH?

-I know that in Seattle they need someone to run their Oncology Department…

-But you don't want to go there… because you know no one there… because you know House isn't there…

-No. … I miss him Cuddy.

-I know, Wilson. And … why don't you go where he is?

-I … I don't know where he is.

-Really? she says and smiles. Wilson, you're a bad liar, I know you know where he is, otherwise you would be much more worried… I'm sure he gives you news…

-Do you think it would be a good idea ?

-Do you think you can handle him again? Do you think you can live in the same city as him? Do you think you can have your own life if you live near him? Do you think he lets you enough time for you? Are you ready to dedicate him again a big part of your time? Of your energy? But without lecturing him all the time? Because it is one of the criticism that he made us…

-I don't know, … but on the other hand I don't manage to have a life when he's not here! I'm still worried about him even if he's far away from me. Wilson stares at Cuddy who gives him his glance back. What would you do if you were me?

-Well, I think I'd ask the same questions as you, I'd probably choose to move, just like I'm gonna do with Rachel… But I have no idea if what I'm going to do is the right thing to do, if my choice is the best choice for Rachel and me… and for … And you? Do you think I'm right to leave PPTH and go on the other side of the country? Cuddy quickly adds.

-Well, you gave me your reasons… and after all, they're good reasons, so … yeah, I think you're right, Wilson says and looks at her intrigued. Who did she want to mention after her and Rachel? he wonders.

-Yeah, I hope so … And you probably can advance the same arguments… Too much memories here in this place, good time but also bad time, sadness, fear, despair…, she adds ,looks at Wilson and gives a hint of smile.

-Yeah, you make a good point, but can you assure me it would be better somewhere else?

-No, I can't, Wilson, I can't. But as for me, I know I can't stay here either, I have to move, it's a certainty.

Wilson looks at her, without saying a word, he'd want so much to have the same self-confidence as her, the same certainty about his life, about what he has to do, about what he needs… Cuddy smiles, she seems to have found a kind of peace, does she really know what House has planned? Wilson is dying to know it, but he can ask her nothing without risking to betray the secret of House.

-Thank you, Cuddy. … I'm gonna think about it, but you're right, there are too much memories here…

-I know you'll choose well.

-Wilson! Why didn't you pick up? I try to join you since one hour!

-House! Sorry, I had a meeting.

-So, does Cuddy accept the job in Apton?

-Yes, she accepts it, she has already begun to pack all her things and those of Rachel. But…

-YES! I knew she'd come! … And what do you mean with "but"?

-House, she suspects something, I am sure of it!

-Why do you think she knows something? Did you tell her something that can lead her to think I have something to do with it?

-No, no, I didn't say anything… but she told me to thank you…

-To thank me? For what? House asks, intrigued.

-I don't know, she didn't tell me, she just said "Thank House for me". Do you believe she discovered everything?

- I don't know, I haven't seen her. And… what about you? Did you think of what I told you?

-Yes, I also talked with Cuddy about it.

-What? You talked with Cuddy about it?

-Don't worry, I just told her I'll probably move too and I wanted to have some advices from her, I didn't mention you, I'm not that stupid!

-And what did she advise you?

-She just told me I really have to think about what I want, if I need to change everything in my life or just let the time do its work.

-Witty girl! I'm sure that helps you a lot! Wilson, trust me, you have to move here! We need each other, we need to share things at work and in our private life, we live in a kind of symbiosis, and you perfectly know that I'm right.

-Maybe…

-Tell me! Are you happy right now with your life?

-I … probably not, but I'm not sure I'll be happier if I come live and work near you.

-I know a great bar, the barman is cool and there are a lot of pretty girls who just wait for you…

-Really? Do you think I'd like the city and the climate?

-Sure!

-And can you find me a job as oncologist in your hospital?

-Well, you maybe have to wait for Cuddy to find you a job, but … you can always come here for some vacations… and spend some time with your best friend.

-Why not? I need vacations, keep a room for me in your apartment, I'm coming next week!


	8. Chapter 8

_Chapter 8 _

Cuddy has almost packed all their things. She's looking for an apartment in Apton via internet, but it's not easy. There are very few offers and many demands. Maybe she could ask Doctor Malcolm.

-Doctor Malcolm? Here is Doctor Cuddy.

-Hi, Doctor Cuddy. May I help you? Or do you have any question about the hospital?

-Heu, yes. I have some questions about the functioning of the hospital, but nothing urgent, it can wait for my arrival to Apton. No, my question is personal and practical nature, I'd like to know if you could indicate me a realtor because it seems difficult to find an apartment, so …

-I know, a lot of new colleagues have the same problem as you. I inquire and I call you back.

-Thank you.

-Mommy! When are we going?

-Rachel, I've already told you, we have to stay here 8 more days and then we go.

-No! I want to go now! I want House! I want House!

- Rachel, please, be a good girl. … Do you want to play with Mommy before we eat?

-Oh yes! We play "Feed the monkey", says the little girl and goes to hold the game.

Cuddy is always surprised that Rachel asks for House every day, she didn't realize how much her daughter needs House. And she dreads Rachel's reaction if she's wrong. She is 90% sure that House is behind all this, but … if not? After all she would so much like it's the explanation for this job offer that she maybe convinced herself of it. Like each time she had hard time in the past with the work or with her private life, she needs him right now, and maybe more than ever… Of course he has done horrible things to her, crazy and dangerous things, but… she loves him, she can't help it! She broke up with him but she regrets it, she wishes she didn't. She knew he was a drug addict, she knew he was scared to get deeply involved in a relationship with someone, she knows him so well and nevertheless she has expected something from him she perfectly knew he couldn't do. All this crappy situation is mostly her fault, not his, and she feels guilty. She should have known how it will unfold, she should have known she couldn't deal with this, neither he. He tried to warn her, but she was so happy in his arms, so in love with him, she had waited this moment since more than 20 years! She really thought she could do it, she really thought he could change for her. And he tried, she can't deny it, he really tried to change for her, to be the man she dreamed of, but this man wasn't him, this man wasn't the one she loves. She knows it now, but it's maybe too late. Will he forgive her? Will he accept to begin a new relationship with her? Will he be able to take the risk to be hurt a second time? To get emotionally involved with her and with Rachel? … And I? Will I be able to live with him, to accept him for what he really is and not to put "impossible standards" on him like I did last time? I want it, I desperately need him, I love him, but will it be enough? Will we be able to be happy together, to love each other without hurting each other like we did? Can we be a family? I hope so… I need him in my life… And he should be a nice guy otherwise Rachel wouldn't care so much for him. Children feel when people are good for them or not, don't they? Be that as it may, I have to think about a good explanation if I don't want her to be too much disappointed in case he will not be there. Maybe I shouldn't have lied to her. However, it's too late now.

-Doctor House! Malcolm calls through the hall.

House is about to go home, but this guy may have important information, and he has promised to behave like an adult, so …

-Doctor Malcolm, do you need something? he says and smiles.

-Maybe. Doctor Cuddy just called me, she needs an apartment, but it's very difficult to find one, a lot of construction sites started and some will soon be ended but while waiting for, it's very difficult to find a place to live, then...

-Oh, I see… but what can I do? I'm neither a magician, nor a construction worker… I do sometimes DIY but it's not my specialty, replies House ironically.

-No, of course not… But if I understood well, you and Doctor Cuddy were …

-We were …?

-Well, you know what I mean. I called some colleagues to get some information about Doctor Cuddy before I proposed her the job of director… and …

-And …? repeats House who finds Malcolm's embarrassment funny.

-And … well, I heard that you and Doctor Cuddy were … together, he whispers on a confidential tone.

-Yes, you're right, we were, says House sadly.

-I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you, I …

-Don't worry, it's ok. So what do you want to tell me? I still don't understand how I can help her to find an apartment.

-Well, I called a friend of mine who's a realtor, he has three apartments to rent, but I don't know Doctor Cuddy personally and I thought that … maybe you could … go and visit the apartments and choose one for her.

-Well, I don't know if I can… I have a lot of work here and…

-That's not a problem, I can give you one day off to go to visit the apartments…

- Ok, I'll do it!

-Hm, there's a little problem…, adds Malcolm. My friend didn't tell me if they're free or if she'll have to wait for a few days to move.

As House says nothing and waits for him to continue, Malcolm speaks again: In this case, I thought you could maybe accommodate her for a while…

-No, no, I can't. The break up was quite awful and we were not on good terms when I left, replies House in a low voice. And besides I…

- Oh! I forgot! You told me you have a wife, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you…

-And furthermore, my best friend comes next week to visit me, so I have no place, I'm sorry. You can tell her to go to the hotel …

-I'm not sure it'll be correct to welcome her like this. I think it would be better if I ask Doctor MacEnzie.

-Who's this?

-Our head of Pediatric. He's very kind and has a big house.

-So why did you ask me? exclaims House, jealous. He hadn't thought about this.

-Because I didn't want you to be surprised and I thought that maybe… After all, you recommended her to me.

-Yeah, thank you. But I'm sure I'll find her an apartment, so please, don't ask him immediately. I inform you, says House and leaves.

House sits in his couch since one hour, the TV is on but he doesn't watch it, he's lost in his thought. If Cuddy can't find an apartment, if she accepts to live in the house of this MacEnzie…, even if it's just for a week… House has seen this guy, he's quite young and handsome, and apparently he's single! Which isn't a good thing for House. Who knows what can happen? Cuddy is fragile, she probably still doesn't recover from their break up and needs certainly to be comforted, and if this guy is interested and tries to seduce her… House isn't sure of Cuddy's reaction… Of course, he trusts her, he knows she still loves him but… the last time he saw her, she was with a guy… now he knows that it was Julia's idea, but… House feels angry and jealous. He's still so in love with her, he needs her, he craves for her… and the simple idea to think she'll be in the same house as a man drives him crazy. He has to find a solution and quickly. After a while a smile appears on his lips, he gets a plan. And Wilson will help him.


	9. Chapter 9

_Chapter 9 : new chapter, don't know if it's good, but I hope you'll enjoy it _

-Wilson! It's me, House. Can you come earlier, for example tomorrow?

-Why? Wilson asks surprised. Why does House want him to come earlier? What has he planned again?

-I need your help to find an apartment for Cuddy.

-Wow! But why do you need me? I still don't get it. Can you explain me?

-You know how to deal with realtor and you're a good manipulator, is that enough for you?

-Well, you're a good manipulator too, so why me?

-Remember! Last time you pinched the apartment which wanted Cuddy… It's thus fair that you help her to get one.

-Well, I think you're right… And I have no choice, isn't it?

-So, I wait for you tomorrow! Just call me to tell me when you're there. See ya…

-House! I … Grrr! He hangs up!

The next day in the afternoon. House picked Wilson up at the airport and they drive now towards Apton.

-So, what's your plan? Wilson asks.

-Listen. We are half brothers, we need an apartment and it's very urgent because you're very ill, you suffer a lot, you could die soon and one of your last wish is to live here because we were living here when we were kids and our grand Ma died here. And I'm working here at the hospital, it's also better for you, you can have the best care for your last days and when the fateful hour will come, I can be there at any time.

-House, are you kidding? That's a stupid story! How can you think it'll work!

-It has to! replies House and gives Wilson a serious glance. You played in a film when you were student, didn't you? You can also play a dying man!

-House, that wasn't a "real" film, you know it! …

-But you were so good! replies House and gives a wink to Wilson.

-Why is it so important that we get immediately an apartment for Cuddy? You didn't tell me everything. I know that you're hiding something. If you want me to help you, you have to tell me …

-Alright, House says as they arrive at the real estate office. If we don't find an apartment for Cuddy before the end of the week, Malcolm will suggest her to live at MacEnzie's place until she finds a house.

-Who's this?

-The head of Pediatric.

-And… what's the problem? … Oh, let me guess, … you're afraid she can fall in love with him and forget you? Am I wrong?

-… No, you're right, House says in a low voice, looking at his hands. He'd so much like to take her hand in his…, to caress her cheek, her lips…

-House! House! Are you ok? Can we go and find this "Precious stone"?

-Whaat?

-The apartment for Cuddy!

-Yes, let's go!

The realtor shows them 3 apartments and a house. Wilson and House look at everything attentively, inquire about the neighborhood, the price and especially on the possible date of moving in. Wilson plays the "dying man", he walks very slowly and breathes hard as if his next breath will be the last one. Then they talk about it for 5 minutes, but House knows perfectly that it's the second apartment that Cuddy would choose if she was there. It's big and very bright, with a beautiful view of a park where Rachel can go to play. House can imagine the little girl playing in the playground or running after a ball. Wilson agrees with House's choice. But there's a problem, it will only be free in 10 days. House and Wilson try to convince the realtor, a young man, to bring forward the departure of the current tenant of 3 days. Wilson makes an exhausted, unwell face, hoping that his last wish will be fulfilled. The realtor feels sorry for him and decides to call the tenant but this one refuses to leave before, even after House and Wilson explain him their sad story.

-I told you this story was stupid! says Wilson, once in the car.

-So…, maybe you can convince Cuddy to delay her departure of PPTH by 2 days?

-House! You know she can't do that! She will have no place to live, she already sold her house!

-Wilson, she can't live with this guy in his house!

-It's only for 2 days! replies Wilson.

-But it's already too much! I won't bear it!

-House! Trust her! She loves you!

-But she doesn't know I'm here, does she? House says and looks so scared that Wilson feels sorry for him. His friend is still crazy in love with Cuddy, he's terrified at the idea of losing her again. Wilson never saw him like that before.

-No, I don't think she knows you're here, but… she knows something, I talked to you about it. … And even if she accepts to live in MacEnzie's house – and incidentally I don't think that Cuddy jumps for joy at this idea - it doesn't mean that she's going to throw herself into the arms of the first one to come! You know her better than anyone else, House! You know that she doesn't date anyone since your break up, the man in her living room was a friend of her sister, Julia insisted so that Cuddy got acquainted of this guy, it wasn't Cuddy's idea! On the contrary, she was kinda reluctant.

-I know, but…I need her in my life, Wilson, I can't leave without her, I don't want to lose her a second time… I … I love her.

Wilson stares at his friend, but finds nothing to say.

Cuddy explains a few things to the new Dean of PPTH when her cell phone rings, it's Malcolm. I'm sorry, I come back soon, she says to Mr. Thomas.

-Doctor Cuddy? It's Doctor Malcolm.

-Good afternoon, Doctor Malcolm. Is there a problem?

-Not really. We found you an apartment, but it will only be free in 10 days and …

-Oh, I see… Isn't it possible to have it two days earlier? I mean 8 or 10 days, it's not a big deal…, she replies annoyed.

-Well, we tried but the current tenant wasn't very cooperative…

-Well, can you try again? I already sold my house and the removal men will be there in 8 days, … it wouldn't be a big problem if I was alone, but I have a daughter and she's young, she needs a place to live in.

-Yes, I understand, well I promise you to try again, but may I suggest you a solution while waiting for?

-I listen to you.

-Our head of Pediatric will be happy to accommodate you the time you need to get your apartment, what do you think of it?

-Well, I … I don't know, I … I mean that's very kind of him, but as I said, I have a little daughter and …are you sure he'll be ok?

-Yes, I already asked him, he has a big house and is single, so …

-Wow! I hope you don't intend to play the go-betweens, because I'm not looking for a man.

-Don't get me wrong, Doctor Cuddy, I … my suggestion was maybe awkward, but that's absolutely not in my intention to …

-I'm sorry, but I had hard times recently and … well, however, thank you for your help, I appreciate it, really… just try to get the apartment when I arrive, please…

-Don't worry, I understand, Doctor House explained me …

-Doctor House? Is he working for you? exclaims Cuddy, trying to contain the joy which invades her heart. She knew it! She knew it!

-Doctor House? No, no, I don't know him, stammers Malcolm, you misunderstood what I said, I just … wanted to tell you that there's a house which will be free next month, so if you can wait it can be a good opportunity… adds Malcolm trying to convince Cuddy that he never said that name because he remembered that he promised House not to tell Cuddy he's working here.

-Oh, replies Cuddy, a little disappointed. But deep inside, she's now certain that House is in Apton and that's him who proposed her name to run the hospital. No, try to get me this apartment. Good bye, Doctor Malcolm, she says and hangs up. Cuddy is happy, soon she will see him again, and this time she doesn't want to screw up their relationship, she'll give him the necessary time to calm down, to forgive her, she won't pressure him even if she craves for him, she will find the patience to wait for him to be ready to get involved again in a relationship. But the little delay with the apartment annoys her. She wants in no way to go to live in the house of somebody whom she doesn't know. She has to find a solution. Maybe she and Rachel can live with House for two days… But she has to be careful when she asks him, she doesn't want to scare him… And how can she contact him? She's not supposed to know that he's there… With luck, Malcolm will manage to get the apartment earlier than planned.


	10. Chapter 10

_Chapter 10_

Wilson and House are now in the bar with the "cool" barman about whom House had spoken, they drink a cocktail and try to find a solution for Cuddy.

-So, what do we do now? Have you any idea? Wilson asks.

-No. What do you think we should do? Let her live with this man for two days? Try to find something compromising on the tenant or on MacEnzie? If only I knew a detective!

- Well… we know one…, replies Wilson with some hesitation.

-Who? asks House. No, no, no, don't even mention his name!

-But he's good, he may find something we can use to get the apartment earlier!

-Wilson! Do you really think he'll accept to work for me after …. Well, you know after what!

-A job is a job, I'm sure he'll do it.

-If we don't find anything else, then maybe… but first I'd like to find another solution, says House after a while.

-Ok. Any suggestion?

-Let me think…

-And … why not to discredit Cuddy with MacEnzie? Wilson suddenly says.

-Can you explain your idea to me? replies House interested.

-Well, if we tell him she's an unpleasant, execrable, ugly bitchy girl who'll annoy him for nothing, who always complains about everything… then maybe he won't accept to accommodate her.

-And we can also talk about her daughter, a real little pest, a spoilt child who touches everything, runs everywhere, jumps on the couch, that one of her favorite games is to scatter noodles everywhere in the living-room… then he'll certainly refuse to have both of them in his house! adds House with a smile. Wilson, I knew you could be a bad boy! Cheers! We're gonna discredit Doctor Cuddy with this MacEnzie.

-Cheers! But we have to choose carefully what we're gonna say about her and Rachel, because she may have problem then to run the hospital, Wilson adds.

-Don't worry! She's the best one to run and improve a hospital, and her professional reputation has already preceded her. MacEnzie doesn't know her and we're gonna show him how awful she can be, replies House with a little smile.

Meanwhile, Cuddy tries to explain Dr. Thomas, her replacement, what he absolutely needs to know to run PPTH. He seems a little overwhelmed by the extent of the work, but he also seems to be willing to do the best he can…

-At least, I won't have to supervise Doctor House, he says with a smile.

Cuddy looks at him, surprised. Why do you say that?

-Well, I know he was working here for a few weeks and everyone knows he is…

-He is? Cuddy replies a little irritated and gives him a murderous glance.

-He is… a little stubborn and … does exactly as he pleases, so I assume it's difficult to supervise him, answers Dr. Thomas with hesitation. He suddenly remembered that Doctor Cuddy and House had a relationship.

-Forget him and try to concentrate on the current work, she replies coldly.

Dr. Thomas looks at the floor and doesn't say anything. Cuddy can't help to take House's defense once more, even after all he's done to her. She doesn't know why she feels the need to defend him against the other doctors, House is a brilliant doctor, a world-famous doctor, but he's uncommon and a lot of their colleagues are envious and at the same time they admire him. However this "Thomas" gets her on the nerves, he tries to make humor but he isn't funny at all, he even tried to flirt with her but she put him frankly in his place. Since he's gone, the atmosphere at the hospital is not any more the same. There is no more "surprise", no more new, risky and creative experience to treat the patient. No more outburst of anger, no more sweet banter, no more allusions to her ass, no more sweet moments… She misses House so much! And she shouldn't! She knows she shouldn't miss him, love him, need him… but she just can't help it. But soon, she will begin a new life, and she hopes he'll be a full part of it. She and Rachel need him in their life, just like he needs them too.

-Doctor MacEnzie?

-Yes. Do you need something, Doctor House? MacEnzie replies and smiles.

-Hm, no, not really. I just wanna know if the rumor is true.

-What kind of rumor? MacEnzie asks, a little surprised.

-I heard that you had suggested accommodating Doctor Cuddy, the new Dean of Medicine.

-Oh! Yes, the apartment she wants to rent will only be free next week on Saturday and she arrives on Tuesday I think, so she needs a place to live for a few days and I think it's better for her and her daughter to live in a house than in a room in a hotel, don't you agree? he asks with a smile and light in the eyes.

-Yes, it's very kind of you, I'm sure she'll appreciate your gesture, says House sighing and seems to be very sorry for MacEnzie. MacEnzie looks at him, he doesn't know how to interpret House's glance.

-Hm, Doctor House, may I ask you something?

-Of course.

-Why do you seem to feel sorry for me?

-Oh! You don't know her, do you?

-Who? Doctor Cuddy? No, I just know her of reputation, I know she's a very good Dean of Medicine, but effectively I don't know anything about her. Is it something I have to know about her? he asks a little anxious.

House looks at him as if he wanted to warn him of a threat. Well, you look kind then I'm going to say to you two or three things on her, but you have to promise me not to tell anyone what I'm going to tell you, House says and looks at MacEnzie straight in the eyes.

-O … okay. I promise.

-The first thing you have to know about Doctor Cuddy is that she's a real bitch. She always wants to have the last word, she can't stand being contradicted. She always complains, nothing or no one is good enough for her. She's very demanding, she likes being served and she will probably ask you to babysit her little girl. I hope you have a big house and that she'll have her own room as well as her daughter, adds House by smiling while MacEnzie looks more and more anxious. MacEnzie, are you ok? You seem very pale.

-Yes, I'm fine, thanks. Is there anything else?

-I just told you the minimum necessary. Do you want some information about her daughter?

-Well, yes.

-She's a real pest, a spoilt child, she jumps and runs everywhere and her mother lets her make everything she wants like for example play with noodles in the living-room. I hope your couch isn't too new and that you don't pay it too much, because … with this child… well, you see what I mean, you're a pediatrist, says House and gives him a wink. And House keeps on telling him awful things about Cuddy and Rachel.

MacEnzie looks a little scared, he doesn't know if he should believe all what House said, he loves his house and his furniture, his friends always tell him he's a maniac who likes his home more than people, and that's why he's still single. When Malcolm asked him to accommodate Doctor Cuddy and her daughter, he was first reluctant, then he accepted because some colleagues told him Doctor Cuddy was stunning and that they'd like to have such a woman in their house but because of their wife it was difficult. He thought then that he could maybe flirt with her, and as one thing leads to another … But now, after all what House told him, he's not sure any more to want to accommodate her at him. On the other side, now he accepted, it wouldn't be fair to refuse.

-Doctor House, is it true that Doctor Cuddy is a beautiful woman? he suddenly asks, taking House of-guard.

-Well, I won't lie to you, Doctor Cuddy is really gorgeous, a poisoned rose if you want my opinion.

-Finally a good point for her! MacEnzie says a little relieved. If she's really as beautiful as everyone says, then he can maybe forgive her and her daughter some faults. The loneliness begins indeed to be heavy, and he feels more and more the need to be with somebody. He will think about it, but it can be worth to sacrifice a couch if at its place he finds the love, isn't it?

-I hope what I've told you will help you, says House and leaves. He's worried. He saw on MacEnzie's face that this one was about to refuse to accommodate Cuddy, but after he told him Cuddy was a gorgeous woman, his attitude changed suddenly. House saw the light in MacEnzie's eyes and it frightened him. House is afraid that this guy will try to seduce Cuddy, and jealousy invades his heart. He hopes that all he told will eventually lead MacEnzie to refuse to accommodate Cuddy, to stay away from his love, but… who knows what will happen? And it's already Friday, Cuddy arrives in 4 days, he must find something, he won't bear to know her in the same house as this f….g guy!

-I can see at your face that our plan doesn't work, says Wilson when he meets House in the bar. His friend called him 10 minutes earlier. House looks angry and jealousy lights his eyes. Wilson is afraid his friend can do another stupid thing, like running his car in MacEnzie's dining-room this time.

-No, it didn't work well.

-What happened?

-He was about to refuse and then he asked me if Cuddy is a beautiful woman and…

-And you said yes.

-Of course, I said yes! I can't lie about it, everybody knows it! House shouts.

-House! Calm down! Don't do another stupid thing! If you want to lose her once again, then … go, do a stupid thing, but …

-I know, Wilson! I have to behave like an adult, I have to control myself! House says desperate.

-I'll help you, House, you're not alone.

After a while of silence, Wilson says: House, if you want, I can call her and explain…

-Explain what? That I'm the one who organized all this? That the man who could have killed her is the one who gave her name for the job in order to be next to her again? What do you think she'll believe Wilson?

-I think she'll be angry and mad at you maybe but …

-No! She'll think that I'm gonna try to take her back by every possible means, and she's certainly afraid of me, she probably fears that I can be dangerous for her or Rachel… Do you really think she wants to see me again? After all I've done to her? he adds sadly.

-House, I'm sure Cuddy still loves you, she's maybe mad at you because of what you've done, but I also know she needs you in her life just as you need her in yours. Just give her time, and learn to trust her. You're meant to be together, how can you doubt it?

-I … I don't know, Wilson. I love her, but I'm not sure to be the man she needs, the man she wants.

-If you don't try, if you don't talk to her, you'll never know.

-That's why you stay here with me instead of asking out the woman at the table there? replies House with a little smile.

Wilson blushes. He doesn't think House has noticed his interest for this woman. He should have known it, but … he'll always surprise him with his skill of observation. In front of the expression of Wilson's face, House laughs.

-How do you know? Wilson asks.

-Each time we come here, she sits at the same table and you look at her with hungry eyes, it's obvious that you like her, House says and punches gently Wilson's shoulder.

-Well played. Do you think I have a chance?

-Let's try and you'll know! House replies with a wink.

-Only if you promise me to keep control and to trust Cuddy, Wilson says and looks at House straight in the eyes.

-I promise you to behave, and I rely on you to help me. But you have a few days free before Cuddy arrives, so take your chance with this girl. I think she's worth it.

-Yeah, I agree, so see ya, says Wilson and goes to the table where the girl sits.


	11. Chapter 11

_Chapter 11: a short one, hope you'll enjoy the story_

It's Monday evening. Cuddy has just packed the last things. Rachel already sleeps. The movers arrive tomorrow morning at 8 am. Cuddy sets the clock on 6:30 so she has time to rid the beds and take the last things in the bathroom. Then she lies on her bed but can't sleep, too many thoughts haunt her mind. She puts the radio on and listens to the music, she hopes so to find some peace and some sleep. Malcolm told her he didn't manage to get her apartment earlier, she so has to go to this MacEnzie, which doesn't really please her, but she has no real choice, she doesn't want to offend her new colleagues and go to a hotel. I just hope that House is there… I miss him so much… I hope he'll want to see me and will understand that I couldn't help but accept the invitation of MacEnzie for a few days, he can be so violent and do so crazy things when it's about me, sometimes he scares me, I don't know if I do the right thing by going there where he lives. I know he never wanted to hurt me or Rachel, and I can understand how hurt he must have felt when he saw me with the guy that Julia invited, but … Cuddy, what do you really want? she asks herself and looks at the ceiling. Do you simply know it? Are you sure you want this man? Are you sure you can deal with all he's done to you? Are you sure you can forgive him? Are you sure you want to spend the rest of your life with him? You have once already tried and that badly ended… You know him, you know he's screwed up, you know he's a drug-addict, are you ready to deal with all his sides? Are you ready to accept his faults too? Because if you're not, then don't go there, even if you love him, if you're not ready to forgive him, it won't work. NOOOOO, she suddenly shouts. It has to work because I can't live without him, I need him in my life, Rachel needs him too… I love him, and I know he loves me… Wilson was right, we can't live without each other…

"_Oh can't you see_

_That for worse or for better_

_We're better together_

_Please, just come back home_

_And don't say that you're sorry_

_And I won't say I told you so…"_

The words of the song suddenly hit Cuddy. They fit so perfectly with her and House. He told her he would do horrible things to her again because he hadn't change and that their relationship wouldn't work, but she didn't want to hear him, to listen to what he said. She thought, she was sure she could handle him and his "bad sides", she tried and believed she could, but indeed she couldn't, she failed to love him the way he deserves it, she screwed up and now she feels so bad, so sorry, even guilty… They had hard times when they were together, they didn't really dare to have a fight about little things, they both accumulated of small criticism to the other one and at the end she "exploded" and left him out at the door. After a few days he eventually apologized but she knows that she wasn't fair play. She pouted like a little spoilt girl whereas he tried to be like she wanted him to be. Then they reconciled and she was happy again, but was he really happy with her? Is she what he really needs? Why is it so hard? Why can't it be simple? She loves him, he loves her, so what's their problem? Why can't they just be happy together?

On the other side of the country, House can't sleep either. Cuddy arrives tomorrow afternoon, Malcolm told him a few hours earlier. He wanted to know if House would like to pick her up at the airport. House didn't take the time to think about it and answered immediately yes. He doesn't want that MacEnzie picks Cuddy up and drives her immediately to him, he wants to see her first, he needs to see her, he misses her so much… And he wants to warn her about MacEnzie, he wants to tell her that this man will try to seduce her, that she has to be careful with him… that he's not the man she needs… but by what right can he say that? MacEnzie will maybe a good man for Cuddy and Rachel, a man who understands them, a man who can supply to their needs… a man who'll be there when they need him… all that he never was… Suddenly he hears Wilson coming home.

-Hey, Wilson! How was your date? House asks with a little smile.

-House! It's 3 am, why are you not sleeping? I'm a big boy, I don't need a chaperon!

-Really? I thought you'd like to speak about your evening with your friend…, House says and stares at Wilson. So? How was this girl?

-Why do you want to know that? Wilson asks suspicious…. Do you know her? Do you tell her to go out with me because you feel guilty to get soon Cuddy back at you while I'm still alone?

-Wilson! How can you simply imagine that? You offend me! replies House and pretends to be vexed. Wilson looks at his friend, but he can't say if House plotted everything or not.

-Well, let's say that I leave you the benefit of the doubt…

-Thank you so much, replies House ironically. Will you eventually tell me how your dinner was?

-It was great, this evening was really great, House. And Kate, she…

-Kate?

-Yes, Kate, she's really nice, she's beautiful, smart and funny, she likes the theater and the contemporary art, she works in a picture gallery of the city center, we have a lot in common, I … I think I'm gonna give her a try, Wilson answers his eyes glittering with happiness.

-Good for you! House says and smiles to see his friend so happy. He knew that Wilson will like Kate the second he saw her.

-Yeah,… thank you, House. … And what about you? Why are you still up?

-I … can't sleep…

-You think about her, don't you?

-Yes. What do you think I should do, Wilson? House asks and seems so lost and desperate that Wilson decides to help him to go through this.

-Well, we go and pick her and Rachel up tomorrow at the airport, then I take Rachel with me and YOU talk to Cuddy.

House looks at Wilson, he's the best friend he ever had. And if she doesn't want to talk to me?

-Don't be stupid, House! When I left her a week ago, she spoke everyday about you! She missed you, House! She still loves you, believe me!

-I hope you're right, Wilson, House says in a low voice. But do you think that I'm the man she really needs? Are you sure that I'm good enough for her? That I deserve her? She's so beautiful, so smart, so funny… she's so … I can't find a word to describe how wonderful she is… She probably deserves someone better than me. Maybe I should go and let her live her life, start a new life…

-House! What are you thinking of? Don't be so stupid! Don't depreciate you so much! I don't even recognize you! That's not the man that Cuddy loves and wants! She wants the strong, brilliant, funny House! That's this one she loves! Not a pale image of him!

-Do you believe it?

-Of course! And Cuddy is as screwed up as you. She wasn't happy with Lucas although he assured her a certain feeling of safety, of stability. She's uncommon just like you, and she needs an "uncommon life" with the "most incredible man she's ever known", she doesn't want a life of routine, she got bored with Lucas because nothing "special" happened. With you, she knows she'll have hard time, but she also knows you'll offer her an interesting life, full of surprises and love.

-Maybe.

- And if you want to have … more time just for the two of you, I can take care of Rachel.

-Really? You'll do it?

-Of course, I do! You and Cuddy need to talk seriously. And it will take some time.

- And what about Kate?

-Don't worry, Kate told me she loves children.

-Good point for her.

-She told me too that … she hopes to find soon a man who can be the father of her future children, if you want to know the truth, adds Wilson a little embarrassed.

-It seems that you find a woman who knows exactly what she wants… I'm afraid to screw it up one more time with Cuddy. … I don't want to lose her, Wilson, she's all I need!

-House, you won't screw up this time, just open up to her, just accept to open your heart to her, she knows you, she understands you like nobody else, I'm sure she has already forgiven you.

-I hope so… I want her, I need her in my life…and I'll be there for her and for Rachel every time they'll need me.

-I'm sure you do. But you have to open up and let her see your feelings, your fears… Trust her, talk to her and it will work.

-Ok, thanks, Wilson.

-You're welcome. Now, let's go to bed or we're gonna be so tired that Cuddy and Rachel will be scared, Wilson adds and smiles.

-And what about MacEnzie?

-What? She doesn't know him! How can she fall for him? He's nothing compared to you! And …

-And? Wilson, tell me what you plan!

-Nothing, just let me do tomorrow and take care of Cuddy… the way she needs the most, if you see what I mean, Wilson says and gives House a wink full of allusions.


	12. Chapter 12

_Chapter 12_

Rachel is so excited to take a plane and to see House, that it's hard to keep her quiet during the flight.

-Rachel, you'd better sleep a little or you're gonna be too tired to play with House, Cuddy tells her and caresses Rachel's head.

-Ok, mommy, but you'll let me play and watch the Pirate cartoon with House tonight! Rachel says and puts her head on Cuddy's shoulder. Cuddy puts her arm on the back of the little girl and begins to sing softly. After a while, Rachel falls asleep and Cuddy tries to rest.

_Ladies and gentlemen, please attach your seatbelts, we begin the landing_.

-House! House! Where is House! I want to see House, mommy, Rachel says and jumps in the hall where they're waiting for the luggage.

-Yes, Rachel, wait a little. But don't be too disappointed if he's not there, I don't know if he'll pick us up at the airport, we may have to take a cab, Cuddy says.

-Why? Dad has to be here for us!

-Rachel! He has maybe a lot of work and we'll see him later, ok? Cuddy says firmly and rolls her eyes.

-No, I want to see him now! Rachel replies and pouts. I hope he's waiting for us, Cuddy thinks, or I'm gonna have a bad-humored Rachel for the rest of the day.

Once they got back their luggage, they head for the exit.

-Mommy! He is there! House! Rachel suddenly shouts. Cuddy doesn't have time to react that the little girl already runs towards him. Cuddy follows her with the eyes. She sees House and Wilson. Good old Wilson, he knew very well where House was. House looks at her straight in the eyes. Then Rachel tightens him and he caresses her head with a smile, he's happy to see the little girl, he missed her.

-Hey! How is my little pirate doing? he asks.

-House! I missed you, where were you? Why didn't you play with me? Rachel says and keeps her little arms around House's leg.

-I'm here now, don't worry, we're gonna play and watch the pirate's cartoon! House replies. Rachel, do you remember Uncle Wilson? He wants to buy you a big ice-cream, go with him.

-And you and mommy? Don't you want an ice-cream?

-Later, mommy and I have to talk about certain things, but we'll meet you and Wilson. Go now!

-Ok, but tonight we play!

-I promise, House says.

-Come, Rachel, I want to show you something, Wilson says and goes away with Rachel. Here is Kate, my friend, she's coming with us, she knows a place with big ice-creams and a lot of games.

-Bravo! Rachel shouts, she's happy, she saw House and now she's gonna have a big ice-cream with Uncle Wilson.

Cuddy sees all the scene but doesn't move, she seems petrified. She can't help but look at House. He's wearing his blue shirt and a black jeans, he's tanned and even more beautiful and sexy than in her memory. Her heart is racing, her legs are weak, she misses him so much! She wants to jump in his arms, to put her hands around his neck, to go through his hair with her hand, to kiss his lips, to get close to him. But she can't move. She watches him coming towards her. She's wearing a black skirt and a low cut top which emphasizes her breasts. She's gorgeous, a real stunner, House thinks. His heart goes faster in his chest, he'd like to take her in his arms, to caress her hair, to smell her scent, to kiss her neck, to let his fingers go slowly on her cheek, then on her neck, on her back… Fortunately I'm here to pick her up and not MacEnzie! She'll drive him crazy for sure. I don't know if she's aware of the effect she has on men, I'm sure a lot of them fancy her. He stands now right in front of her, but neither speaks. They look at each other, Cuddy is lost in the deep blue of House's eyes, House tries to rate Cuddy's feelings towards him, she seems quiet although a little tense. Both would like to embrace the other, but they're afraid of their reaction. Eventually House says with a smile, still staring at her:

-Hi, little sunshine.

-Hi, House, Cuddy replies in a soft but tender voice.

-You don't seem surprised to see me here.

-I would have been if you were not.

-Cuddy, I … , House begins but can't go on, he's too afraid to say something wrong, to hurt her or to make her angry.

-Where is Rachel?

-Hm, she's with Wilson and Kate… Wilson's new girlfriend, House adds when he sees the questioning look of Cuddy.

-Oh, Wilson has a new girlfriend…

-Yes, and they go to eat an ice-scream with the "lesser Cuddy", if you don't mind.

-And we?

-Oh, I didn't think you'd like an ice-scream, replies House with a smile in a slightly mocking tone. I promise I'll buy you one later if you're a good girl.

-I forgot how funny you could be, she says and smiles.

-You know what?

-No.

-I didn't think I missed your smile so much.

-Wow! What disaster is going to occur?

House looks at her but isn't sure to understand what she means. Cuddy laughs at House's face. It's good to hear her laughing, he thinks, that's a good point, that means she isn't too mad at me.

-Don't worry, House, it's a joke! You never make me compliments for free, I'm just surprised.

-Oh, I got it. I'm sincere, Cuddy, I missed your smile, your laugh, your sarcasm…, House says and comes closer, but still doesn't dare to take her hand.

-House, I… we need to talk seriously, calmly, Cuddy says and looks tenderly at him.

-Yes, I know. When?

-Why not now? Rachel is with Wilson, we'll be quiet to talk. Do you agree?

-Where do you want to go?

-Well, I don't know, she replies and looks around her.

-We can go in a bar or…, House says and looks at her straight in the eyes. He'd like to go to his apartment, but it would be too soon, they need a neutral place, he's ready to be patient because he doesn't want to go too fast and to screw up one more time.

-Ok, let's go in your bar, she says. She hoped he would invite her to him, but she knows he's right, it's better to go in a public place without any pressure. She has to be patient, to go slowly with him if she wants it to work.

Meanwhile MacEnzie waits for Cuddy and Rachel. Malcolm told him this morning that Doctor House would pick her and her daughter up at the airport, he was a little disappointed, he had planned to show them the city before to go to him, but… well, he thinks, they should arrive soon now, except if their flight was delayed. Maybe I should call the airport… Don't be stupid! Even if the flight is delayed, they'll eventually arrive and then you can show them Apton by night! Their room are ready, he went shopping, everything is ok to welcome them. He just has to wait. His mood up, he decides to watch TV.

House and Cuddy sit in House's favorite bar, the barman made him a sign of encouragement with a big smile when he saw him with Cuddy. House used to talk a lot about her when he sat at the counter late at night. They sip their drink silently.

-Cuddy, I … I know I've done stupid things, that I went too far this time, and I'd understand that you can't forgive me…

-House!

-No, please, let me speak. I know that I deeply disappointed you, I lied to you but never on personal things, just for the work, I'd like you to know that I work again with Doctor Nolan, my therapist, in order to get better, to learn to deal with my demons, my fears, my pains…

-House, she says and takes his hand. I'm not an angel, I have a part of responsibility in this disaster… you're not the only one guilty.

-Cuddy, House says and looks at her. His eyes are wet, his throat is tied. I want you to know that I regret, I regret not being there when you needed me, I regret all the horrible things I've done to you, I hope that you'll be able to forgive me one day, I hope that you agree to work with me again, I hope that you agree to be my friend again like in the old good time…

-House, I told you you're not the only one to have made mistakes, to have made things which he regrets… I owe you too apology for my behavior, I know I was sometimes bitchy, but … I thought I'd be able to deal with your "bad sides", I hoped that you'd open up to me, that you'd talk to me about your pain but you didn't, you never expressed your feelings, your fears or your needs… Sometimes I had the impression I was your mother and not your girlfriend! I don't want to be your mother! I want to be your girlfriend, your lover, your confident…I want you to tell me how you feel, what your fears, your hopes, your pains are… I want and I need you to be there by my sides every day, House … I … I can't live without you… And Rachel needs you too. She asked every day where you were, why you didn't come… She loves you House, she calls you her Dad…, Cuddy says and wipes the tears which roll on her cheeks.

-Cuddy, if you want me to be by your sides, every day, I'll be there, for you, for Rachel…I swear… I really try to improve myself in order to be the man you need, the man you deserve… and I missed her too…, House says and puts his hand on Cuddy's cheek. Both perfectly know that Rachel is a way to tell the other how much they missed each other. They remain so without talking, just looking at each other a while, House caressing Cuddy's cheek and Cuddy still holding House's other hand. Do you want to hear a crazy but nice story? House suddenly says.

-Of course, Cuddy replies and smiles.

-When I went to the hospital to ask for a job, I told Doctor Malcolm I had a wife and a daughter, House says and looks at Cuddy straight in the eyes.

-Oh! Well, you're effectively married, but I didn't know you had a child, I didn't know indeed that you want to have a child, she replies with a smile.

-Cuddy! Don't laugh at me! You know why I married Dominica; as soon as she got her green card, we fill the file for divorce! I didn't speak about her and you know it!

-Oh, really? And about whom did you speak then?

-Do you really want to know? He says and takes her hand.

-Yes, I have an idea, but … I need to hear you say it…

-When I told him I had a wife and a daughter, I thought of you and Rachel… I wish it was true, he adds in a low voice, still lost in Cuddy's grey eyes.

-Maybe one day…

-Yeah, maybe…

_Forget your troubles, com'on get happy_

-Oh, I'm sorry, Cuddy says, it's my phone. I don't know this number, I wonder who calls me…

-Let me see, House says and takes Cuddy's phone. That's MacEnzie, he says in a slightly jealous tone. You'd better answer him, he's a real leech.

-Ok, then… Doctor Cuddy on the phone, she says coldly. She's no more Cuddy, House's lover, but Doctor Cuddy, Dean of Medicine. House admires her, he admires her skill to change her attitude in a second according to the context and to the people. He's sure now, MacEnzie has no chance with Cuddy, he doesn't need to worry, Cuddy still loves him, even if she didn't tell him explicitly.

-Doctor Cuddy! It's Doctor MacEnzie, the pediatrician in Apton. Where are you? I called the airport and they told me your flight was on time, did Doctor House pick you up? Or has he forgotten? If this is the case, I come immediately…

-No, no, it's ok, Doctor House was on time. I'm sorry, I should have called you but I hadn't your phone number, we are … friends and we're having a drink, don't worry.

-Oh, I see…, why is House still with her? She should be here with me! MacEnzie thinks upset and jealous. And do you still come to me or…?

Cuddy looks at House. He seems quiet. Yes, I think we're going to you, so see you soon. She hangs up. He seems to be a little upset, how is he? What can you tell me about him?

-Well… he's kinda handsome, he's single…

-House! What are you thinking of! I'm not interested! I don't need a man, I've got already one and that's enough.

-Oh, you already have a man, House says ironically. May I know his name?

Cuddy rolls her eyes and replies sarcastically: Well, it's not really the truth, I had a man, the most selfish son of bitch on the face of this planet, but also the most incredible man I've ever known, the perfect lover… we got some… "problems", at this time we're still not together, but … it seems on a good way… and I hope that we're gonna reconciled very, very soon… because I need him, she adds tenderly.

-But you didn't tell me his name, House notes.

-House! she says and pretends to be irritated.

-I think I know him… People say about him that he's brilliant, funny, handsome, sexy…

-Stop! Your head will explode if you keep on, she laughs.

-Ok, let's go to MacEnzie, but…

-But? she says a little anxious.

-Promise me to be careful, I don't trust this guy, he seems to intend to seduce you… If he tries to …, call me and I come and I smash his face.

-House, don't worry. Everything's gonna be ok, I'll stay by him only for two days. And he'll be working at the hospital… and Rachel will be with me.

-Promise me, Cuddy.

-Ok, I promise you to be careful, I'll wear my nun costume, ok? she adds with a little smile.

-Yeah.

-But…, she adds a little upset.

-But? What's the problem Cuddy? You can talk to me, I made a lot of progress, I know how to listen to people now, he replies with a smirk.

Cuddy looks at him, he really seems to have worked on himself. House, I want you to know that I'm not happy to go to MacEnzie, even if it's only for two days, I don't know him and what you just told me doesn't speak in his favor. Promise me to keep quiet, not to get angry or jealous.

-Thanks, Cuddy, House says and gives her a little peck on the corner of the mouth.

Cuddy feels warmth in her body as House kisses her gently, she'd like him to kiss her passionately, to take her in his arms and to take her to his place…, but she just asks him: Why?

-To tell me that you're not happy to go there… Maybe I can…

-No. I understand your point of view, I know why you don't accommodate me and Rachel, it's too soon, we have to work certain things first, then…

-Yeah, that's right. We have to go slowly to be sure that it works and that this time that lasts. But if you have the tiniest problem with him, call me.

-Ok.

-So let's go.


	13. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13_

House and Cuddy pick up Rachel, the little girl seems to have had fun with Wilson and Kate. Wilson looks at his two friends, they seem relaxed and to be on good terms.

-Mommy! House! I ate a big ice-scream and I play with Uncle Wilson and Kate.

-That's great, Rachel, Cuddy says and takes the little girl in her arms. Now House will drive us to Doctor MacEnzie, we're gonna live there for two days and then we'll move in our new apartment.

-No! I want House! I want to play with Dad! I want to watch the pirate cartoon with Dad! Rachel replies stubborn.

-Rachel, House has to work, maybe you can play with him tomorrow, Cuddy says to the little girl.

-No! Why can't we go to House? He promised to play with me!

Cuddy looks at House, he nods and she doesn't know what to say.

-Listen to me, little pirate, House says. My apartment is too small, you can't come to me, that's why you and mommy are going to Doctor MacEnzie, he has a big house with a garden where you can play.

-No. You have a bed, don't you? Rachel replies mischievously.

-Heu, yes, House answers caught off guard.

-And a couch in your living-room?

-Yes, House answers with a smile. He got it, he knows why Rachel asks this.

-So mommy sleeps with you in your bed and I sleep on the couch, the little girl says very proud of her. Cuddy looks amazed and embarrassed, House, Wilson and Kate burst out of laugh.

-There's a little problem in your plan, little pirate, replies House and scratches the back of his head. Uncle Wilson sleeps already in my couch.

-Oh, Rachel says disappointed and sad. Can't he go to Kate and sleep with her?

Cuddy looks embarrassed at Wilson who blushes, Kate and House laugh.

-Rachel, Cuddy says, squats and puts her hands on the shoulders of the little girl. It's only for two days and tomorrow evening House invites us to the restaurant, so you can see him…

-But I want to play with Dad! He promised!

-Ok, Cuddy, maybe I can take you first to MacEnzie and take Rachel to me for an hour to play with her like I promised, and then I'll drive her to MacEnzie. What do you think of it? House asks.

-Well, I don't know…

-Oh, yes! Yes! Yes! Mommy, please, Rachel says and jumps around her mother.

House stares at Cuddy, he can see that she weighs up the pros and the cons, then she looks at House, she'd like to be with him too, she'd like him to drive her to his apartment too, she'd like him to wrap his arms around her, she'd like to spend the night with him, she needs him, she needs his touch, his caress, she'd like him to make love to her… House can read her thoughts so obvious they are in her grey eyes, he'd like to have her by his sides this night too, but … and she's a little scared to be alone with this guy, even if it's for an hour. House seemed to worry about her because of him… But Rachel seems so happy to be with him, to have him for her alone without Cuddy.

-Ok, let's do that. Rachel, be a good girl with House, listen to him, ok?

-Yes! Ok, Dad, let's go!

House drives Cuddy to MacEnzie, he can feel that she's tense. She's lost in her thoughts, she tries to think of the next day when she's gonna meet all the staff of the hospital, she tries to concentrate on her speech, on what she's gonna tell them… but it's really hard, her mind always comes back to House, to her feelings for him… she hopes that they'll get soon over their past relationship, she hopes that they'll soon find their way back to each other, that they'll forgive each other and start a new life, together. Despite all the horrible things he's done to her, despite her bitchy behavior, she knows he's the one for her, she knows that she'll never find a better man for her and Rachel, she's ready to try again, to give him another chance because as the song says _For worse or for better, they're better together_.

-Here we are, House says suddenly and parks the car in front of a big house. He looks at Cuddy and his heart squeezes, she seems so strong and so fragile at the same time. He has to resist the temptation to take her in his arms. Cuddy…

-Yes?

-If you don't want to go to MacEnzie, we can find a solution…, he says staring at her and taking her hand.

-I know, House. But we both know it would be a too big risk for us, she replies looking at him tenderly. And I don't want to take any risks now that we just got back at each other. I don't want to lose you one more time…

- Do you want me to go with you?

-No, stay with Rachel and come back in an hour, she says and gives him a soft kiss on the cheek. Then she goes out of the car. House waits to see her going into MacEnzie's house, then he leaves.

-Doctor Cuddy, nice to meet you, MacEnzie says with a big smile as he opens the door. Please, come in, and he steps aside to let her in. Where's your daughter?

-She's with House, he takes her here back in one hour, Cuddy replies and comes in.

MacEnzie eyes her greedily, she's gorgeous, the colleagues were right. And it's great that we're alone for one hour…, he thinks staring at Cuddy's ass. He jumps a little when she turns to him and blushes. Well, please follow me, I'm gonna show you your room and the room of your daughter. Cuddy feels uneasy, this man has "hungry eyes", she thinks. House was right as usual. MacEnzie shows her the house, then they go to the living room.

-Do you want to drink something? he asks.

-Hm, yes, if you have some water, I'd like one glass please, Cuddy says rather coldly.

-Oh, MacEnzie replies a little disappointed. I thought you'd like some wine. It would be much more easy to learn each other with a glass of wine.

-No, just some water.

MacEnzie goes to the kitchen and Cuddy looks around her. This man has good taste, he has nice furniture.

MacEnzie stops on the threshold of the living-room and observes Cuddy, she's tiny, with dark curled hair, her clothes fit perfectly her body and MacEnzie feels his blood going faster in his body, this woman is really beautiful and she seems to know what she wants, she must be smart to run such an hospital as the PPTH, she's just the kind of women that MacEnzie fancies. And she's going to live with him for two days… He must admit that she seems cold and distant with him, but … it doesn't disturb him, she doesn't know him, he will show her that he's worth it. But he has no time to waste because in 45 minutes her daughter will be there. He hopes she's going to bed early so he can be alone with Cuddy. Cuddy turns and sees him who observes her, she looks at him straight in the eyes, determined to be a little bitchy with him, she doesn't like this kind of men, they think that all women just wait for them, they're arrogant and pretentious, but she knows how to deal with such men. Well, she hopes so…

-Hm, here's your glass of water, Doctor Cuddy.

-Thank you, Doctor MacEnzie.

-Hm, I was wondering… maybe we can call each other with our first name.

-I'm afraid not, she replies, I'm your boss and your one of my employees, don't forget it, it wouldn't be correct.

-Ok, MacEnzie replies a little upset and surprised.

-You have a nice house, Cuddy says and sits down on the couch with crossed legs so that MacEnzie can admire them. And in fact he stares at Cuddy, he can't help but to focus on her legs, then his eyes go up and stop on her breast. Cuddy looks at him and a smile appears on her lips, she's satisfied, she knew it, this man would like to have her, it's obvious, and he won't, he has no chance and she finds funny that he believes he can seduce her. She's impatient to see how he plans to act. Doctor MacEnzie! Are you lost in a dream world? My eyes are a little higher…, she suddenly asks him in a soft voice.

-Hm, sorry, no…. yes… What did you say? I'm sorry I was thinking of a medical case I have at the hospital, he replies embarrassed and blushes. Mac! Be careful, she's your boss and she's smart, don't be too direct with her, win her trust first, he thinks.

-Oh, I see, Cuddy says and uncrosses her legs. That's very kind of you to accommodate me and Rachel, I hope we won't disturb you, she adds with a wonderful smile.

-You're welcome, that's a real pleasure for me, he says and smiles too. I hope our hospital and our little city will please you and your daughter. I can show you the city tonight if you want… or tomorrow.

-I'd better like tomorrow after work if you don't mind because I'm tired tonight. I think I'm going to go to bed early, I have a hard day tomorrow.

-Yes, I understand, he replies and Cuddy can see how disappointed he is. We'll go tomorrow after work. What do you want to eat?

-Do you have some vegetables? I don't like meat.

-Hm, yes, he replies surprised. House told him she eats only meat and fish! Fortunately he bought tomatoes. I have some tomatoes and some salad… Just tell me what you want.

-Thank you, I think Rachel and I are going to eat tomatoes and salad, she ate an ice-scream, I don't think she's very hungry.

-Ok, he says and goes to the kitchen. It's much more difficult that he has first thought. This woman is really smart, he has the impression she can read in him as in an opened book. And she likes playing, so he'll play with her, but at the end he will win. Maybe.

Cuddy is tired, she just wants to sleep. This MacEnzie is so boring… She hopes House will soon bring Rachel so they can eat and go to bed. The doorbell rings. Cuddy stands up and shouts to MacEnzie: I'm going to open the door, I think it's Doctor House and Rachel. She opens it and sees effectively House and Rachel. He looks at her, trying to see if everything was going well with MacEnzie. Cuddy sees his look and says with a smile: Don't worry, I'm fine, he didn't jump on me!

-He'd better not do it if he wants to have a long and quiet life, House replies calmly but Cuddy knows he's jealous and he's worried to know her alone with this guy.

-Mommy, we played and we watched the pirate cartoon, and House gave me chips and orange juice! Rachel says and she yawns. But now I wanna go to bed, I'm tired.

-Ok, my little pirate, Cuddy says and kisses Rachel's forehead.

-House, you read me a story, the little girl adds and takes House's hand to make him come in.

-Rachel, I don't think it will be possible, Cuddy says.

-No problem, I'm gonna read her a story and puts her in pajamas, don't worry, I used to do it before…, House replies determined and comes in.

-Oh, good evening, Doctor House, MacEnzie says surprised. And obviously annoyed.

-Good evening, Doctor MacEnzie. I'm going to put my little girl to bed if you don't mind, House says with a smile. Honeybun, can you show me Rachel's room, he says and turns to Cuddy who rolls her eyes and try not to burst out of laugh when she sees MacEnzie's face. This one looks very vexed and jealousy lights his eyes. House is so … "housian", Cuddy thinks and finds him so sweet when he acts like her man and Rachel's father. She knows he just wants to show MacEnzie that she's his, that MacEnzie has no right on her and on Rachel, that's a kind of warning and she's him grateful for it.

-Hm, no, of course not, I just didn't know that you and Doctor Cuddy…, he says trying to contain his disappointment and his anger

-Oh, I forgot to tell you, I'm sorry. Honey, didn't you tell him? House says to Cuddy and grabs her ass with a big smile, he finds very funny to play this role, especially because MacEnzie seems to be so disappointed, jealous and vexed. Cuddy jumps a little when House grabs her and gives him a severe glance.

-No, I didn't think it was relevant, she answers and smiles at MacEnzie. I'm sorry, don't care about him. So follow me! I'm coming back soon, she adds then to MacEnzie. House and Rachel follow Cuddy to Rachel's room, MacEnzie is too stoned to react and he remains in the hall.

-Cuddy, are you sure you'll be able to deal with this man? He seems to completely have flashed on you! It can be dangerous for you…

-House! she says and rolls her eyes. What do you think he's gonna do after your "play"? I think he's smart enough to understand your warning.

-I hope so, Cuddy. This kind of men are crazy when they meet a gorgeous woman like you, I don't want you to have any problems with him.

-House, don't worry, she says and comes close to him, puts her head on his shoulder and wraps her arms around him. House wraps her waist and tightens her tenderly. He feels the warmth of her body and his blood is running faster in his body, he can smell her skin, her perfume, he had hoped for such a moment since several weeks, he so often dreamed to hold her in his arms, to feel her body close to his. He'd like to remain like this forever.

-Dad, I want my story, Rachel says and takes House's hand away from Cuddy.

-Yes, my pirate, give me your book and go in the bed, he replies and sits on Rachel's bed, looking tenderly at the little girl. Then he sees Cuddy leaving the room.

-Doctor Cuddy, I didn't know that you and Doctor House were…

-You're right **we were**, she says sadly. I'm hungry, can we eat?

-Of course, MacEnzie replies, his mood up. After all, he still has his chance with her, House was just trying to put me away because he probably wants her back , but I see clearly in his game and I'm gonna try to seduce Cuddy, I'm not afraid of him, and all he said to me about her is probably wrong, he tried to scare me so I won't try to seduce her because he's afraid she can fall for me, MacEnzie thinks, very proud of him, sure that Cuddy will find him irresistible. Do you mind if we eat in the kitchen?

-No, it's ok for me, Cuddy says and sits down on a chair. Your salad seems great, she adds with a little smile.

-Do you want some wine?

-No, I prefer water. I'm too tired to drink wine.

MacEnzie serves her with some salad and they begin to eat. About 10 minutes later, House comes in.

-Well, Rachel sleeps, I'm going home now, see you tomorrow darling, he says and gives a gentle kiss on Cuddy's forehead. Then he gives MacEnzie a strange, but threatening glance, in order to make him understand that Cuddy is his woman and that he'd better behave good with her.

-See ya, she answers and looks at him tenderly.

House gets in his car, he's worried, he doesn't like that Cuddy is alone with MacEnzie. He knows he shouldn't be scared, he knows he can trust her, but… this man has a strange light in the eyes and he doesn't trust him at all. I hope everything's gonna be ok. I'll call her in half an hour to see if she's fine.


	14. Chapter 14

_Chapter 14: Here's a new chapter : MacEnzie tries to seduce Cuddy, but thanks to House's gift she wins the first round ;) hope you'll enjoy it!_

-That was very good, Doctor MacEnzie, thank you.

-You're welcome. Do you want some ice?

-No thank you, I think I'm going to bed.

-Oh, but it's only 9.00 PM, don't you want to watch TV or to listen to music? I'd like you to hear my favorite band, I'm sure you'd like it.

-We can do it tomorrow evening, I'm going to bed now, she replies firmly.

-Please, Doctor Cuddy! Just one song…, MacEnzie says and looks so disappointed that Cuddy eventually agrees.

-Well, you know, I have the impression to have a little spoilt child with me tonight! So just one song, then I'm going to bed, Cuddy replies in the tone a mother would do with a little child.

-Thank you, Doctor Cuddy, he says with a big smile. Please, follow me in the living-room. MacEnzie switches on the stereo and a soft music, a slow begins. Then he turns to Cuddy, self-confident, and asks her to dance with him.

-Well, I told you I'm very tired, I don't think it's a good idea to dance, I should go to bed, she says and begins to leave the room but MacEnzie grabs her wrist and says:

-Please, Doctor Cuddy, it's the custom here to welcome the new colleagues…, he asserts and looks at her straight in the eyes. But Cuddy feels more and more uneasy with him, she doesn't like the glimpse in his eyes.

-I…, but Cuddy can't end her sentence, MacEnzie has already wrapped his arms around her waist and began to dance. He tightens her and begins to move according to the music, he can smell her perfume, he'd like kissing her neck, going through her hair with his hand but he doesn't dare to do it because he's afraid she escapes his embrace and goes away from him, she's driving me crazy, but I'm sure that after this sensual dance she can't resist any longer to me. Cuddy doesn't want to offend him but she doesn't want to let him have the hand on her, he's going too far, she pushes him slowly away from her, looks at him straight in the eyes and says very coldly: Doctor MacEnzie, I'm your boss, don't you forget it, so let's say this never happened, I'm going to bed right now, and I advise you not to hold me, is it clear?

-Yes, I'm sorry, Doctor Cuddy, I don't know why I did that, you're a beautiful woman and I'm single since many months, I think my hormones have the upper hand on my mind, I'm really sorry and I can assure you it won't happen again, he says and lets her go. Damned! She's more difficult to manipulate than I thought, I'll have to resort to drastic measures to achieve my goals. But I haven't a lot of time. How can I lead her in my arms?

Once in her room, Cuddy sighs of relief, she feels a little strange: this man scared her and at the same time his childish behavior amused her, House was right, she has to be very careful, maybe tomorrow it would be better if she can spend the night somewhere else… but where? She jumps as she hears her cell phone ring.

-Cuddy, it's me, House.

-House! she says with relief in the voice.

-What happened, Cuddy? replies House, worried. He heard the relief in Cuddy's voice and wonders what happened. If this MacEnzie did something wrong, tell me and I smash his face.

-No, don't worry, everything's fine. I'm just tired and a little tense because of tomorrow.

-Really?

-Yes! Don't worry! Rachel was very happy to see you, House… And …

-And?

-And I'd like to thank you for your kindness with her…

-You're welcome… But you know… I missed her and I was very happy to see her and to play with her tonight. She's very kind and very smart.

-I know… Did she say anything?

-About what?

-Well, I don't know, … did she tell you that she missed you?, Cuddy says and tries to hide a feeling of embarrassment.

-Among other things yes, she said that she missed me …, House replies letting understand that Rachel said many other things.

-Oh, and … what else did she tell you? Cuddy asks afraid of what her daughter could have said.

-What do you think she told me? House replies amused.

-Well, I … don't know… maybe that I don't want that she watches this pirate cartoon… well, never mind, Cuddy adds preferring to change the subject of conversation which House obviously didn't miss.

-You didn't mean that, little sunshine, and you know that I know… and this child understands a lot of things, you can't imagine all she told me, he replies ironically.

-Of course you won't tell me anything, and most of all not the truth, but be careful revenge is a dish best savored cold…

-Don't worry about me, I know you well…

- I'd like to ask you something, but it can wait tomorrow or even later…

-Tell me! You know I hate to wait!

-No, House, I need to be with you, to look into your eyes, you'll have to wait! And please, don't play the spoilt child or I'll have to punish you…, she adds in a seductive voice.

-Oh, yes, please, mistress, I'm a bad boy, I deserve a punishment, he replies in a whining voice, but Cuddy can imagine the smile on his sexy face. This man drives her insane, but she loves when he teases her and she loves to tease him too.

-I'll think about it… good night, House.

-I hope so…, good night, Cuddy, and…

-And?

-What are you wearing?

-Good night, House, she says and smiles.

-Good night, he says with a smile.

Cuddy is lost in dirty thoughts when she hears MacEnzie knocking at her door.

-Doctor Cuddy? Doctor Cuddy?

Cuddy stands up, she's angry at this man who gets on her nerves. What do you want, Doctor MacEnzie? she asks and opens the door. Fortunately she's still dressed.

-I was just wondering if you were fine because I heard you talking …

-Yes, I'm fine, thanks, I want to sleep now, so see you tomorrow, she says and wants to shut the door but MacEnzie holds it.

-Just another little thing, at what time do you want to get up tomorrow morning?

-Well, I don't know, at 6.00am I think.

-Alright. And do you drink coffee or tea?

-Hm, coffee.

-And your little girl?

-Cereals with milk.

-Good.

-Can I close the door now and go to sleep or do you have any other questions? Cuddy says irritated.

-Don't be mad at me, Cuddy, I just want to prepare a good breakfast for you and Rachel, he says in a soft voice and takes Cuddy's hand. I just try to be a thoughtful host who's attentive to the needs of my guests.

-**Doctor** Cuddy for you and take your hand away from mine, she replies in a severe tone, insisting on "Doctor".

-Don't be so cold with me, Doctor Cuddy, I'm a good man and … a great lover… you won't regret it, give me a chance…, he says in a whining tone and lets Cuddy's hand.

-Listen to me MacEnzie, don't do this again or you gonna regret it for the rest of your life! she says threateningly, then she shuts the door.

-Good night, Doctor Cuddy. I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, I don't know what happens to me, I never behave like that, I'm sorry. If you need something, I'll be in the living-room watching TV. MacEnzie goes to the living-room, he's furious and scared too because he didn't want to offend her, he never wanted to be so direct with her. He tries to reassure himself: I'm sure she'd like to be with me but she's probably afraid of House's reaction, I have to put him out of competition and to buy her some flowers to apologize for my stupid behavior.

Cuddy is furious too, she never thought this man could be so forward with her. But she knows how to avenge herself. After a while she gets out of her room, goes to the living-room where MacEnzie watches a medical show and sits down on the couch next to him. MacEnzie looks at her, Cuddy can see with delight that he's very surprised and a little afraid because she's his boss after all and he behaved badly with her. Oh my God! I hope she won't fire me, he thinks scared.

-Doc… Doctor Cuddy, I'm very sorry, I don't know why I acted like that, I hope that you'll accept my apology… , he says and lowers his eyes.

-I accept your apology… she replies with a smile. But don't ever do it again, she adds in a cold voice.

-I swear, I won't do it again. … What can I do for you? Do you want something?

-Hm, yes. I'd like a glass of wine, she says and looks at him straight in the eyes, and I want you to drink with me.

-Yes, of course. I come back, stay here, he says and goes to the kitchen. When he comes back, Cuddy sits with her legs under her and seems relaxed. Here's your glass, Doctor Cuddy, MacEnzie says and sits down next to her, but not too close. He stares at her like a tiger stares at a prey before jumping on it but Cuddy doesn't mind, on the contrary she feels flattered.

-Thank you. Hm, may I ask you something else? I know that I exaggerate but… do you have some chocolate? she says and gives him a seductive glance.

-Yes, I have some, he says and goes to the kitchen. Cuddy waits a few seconds after MacEnzie left the room, then she takes out the small tube that House gave her for her birthday – bittersweet memories come to her mind, a smile lights her lovely face, this was a good time, I hope we'll make up soon, I miss him so much… - then she takes a tablet which she puts in MacEnzie's glass. When this one comes back with chocolate, Cuddy takes her glass and toasts:

-To a new start in my life! Cheers!

-Cheers! To a wonderful woman! MacEnzie replies and drinks almost all his glass.

-You were thirsty! Cuddy exclaims. But deep down in her heart, she exults.

-Well, yes. You … you make me … nervous, Doctor Cuddy.

-Really? You shouldn't…, she replies in a seductive voice. I hope you'll show me the hospital tomorrow…

-Yes… of… of course…, he says and puts a hand on his face.

-And the city…, she says and looks at him amused.

-And… and the… city… yes…I'm…

-Doctor MacEnzie! Are you alright? she asks him and tries to keep her seriousness in spite of an irresistible urge to laugh.

-Yes, I'm… I'm tired… I'm going … to bed…, he says, stands up, goes to his room and falls asleep on his bed under the amused eye of Cuddy. She goes to her room, puts her nightgown and falls asleep too, now sure MacEnzie doesn't hassle her during the night.


	15. Chapter 15

_Chapter 15: sometimes I think I'm evil, but I hope you'll forgive me. Enjoy this new chapter, and sorry if it's short, next one is almost over._

The room is dark, there is no noise, only her breath drills the silence. MacEnzie feels weird, a little dizzy. Suddenly, she moves in the bed, he roots to the spot, but phew! It was a false alarm, she still sleeps. She's so beautiful, simply breathtaking, he thinks and nears her very slowly, he doesn't want her to wake up. His blood runs faster in his body, his heart beats faster in his chest. He sits down in the bed next to her and remains so one moment to contemplate her. Then he caresses softly her cheek first, then her neck and his hand is about to caress her left breast when she wakes up. He smiles at her and leans over; his face is now just over hers.

-Hey, sleeping beauty, don't worry, it's me your prince Charming, he says in a soft voice and caresses her cheek. She smiles and puts her hand on his neck, drags him on top of her. His lips brush hers, she kisses him deeply, he presses against her, slowly caressing every part of her, he can feel her desire, her tongue dueling with his, her hands on his body and it drives him insane, he never wanted a woman as much as he wants Cuddy. And no one can take her away from him.

Bip! Bip! Bip! 6. AM.

-Hmmm, a new day begins; I just hope it will be great, Cuddy thinks and switches the alarm clock off. She slept well and feels ready for the long day ahead of her. She strains her ears but hears no noise. Perfect! The stupid and annoying Casanova still sleeps, this isn't surprising given the dose of sleeping pills which she gave him last night. She smiles, gets up, makes her session of yoga, then takes a shower, dresses up and goes to wake Rachel up. The little girl is already woken and plays with her wubby.

-Mommy! Can we go to House?

-Morning, Rachel, Cuddy says and kisses Rachel's forehead.

-Morning, mommy, but is House here?

-Rachel! House is probably still sleeping! I'm going to dress you, then we'll have breakfast…

-And we go to House! exclaims the little girl jumping around Cuddy with a big smile.

-Yes, then we take a taxi to go to House, but you have to promise to be very kind with Uncle Wilson and House, Cuddy replies with a smile. Her two friends suggested to take care of Rachel until the weekend while Cuddy begins her new job as Dean of Medicine of the Apton Hospital. Then a nurse called Jessie will take care of her during the day. Let's go to the kitchen and have breakfast, but shhh, Dr. MacEnzie is still sleeping, Cuddy adds and puts a finger on her mouth, and we don't want to wake him up, do we?. The little girl giggles, she likes doing "secret" things with her mother.

If Cuddy slept well, House didn't. He couldn't sleep so worried about Cuddy he was.

-I shouldn't have left her alone with this guy, he repeated endlessly last night to Wilson, I'm sure he can be dangerous.

-House! She's a big girl! She knows how to get rid of such gigolo! Don't worry, come and drink a beer with me. There's a race of monster trucks on TV, Wilson replies. But he's not so sure that Cuddy can defend herself if MacEnzie really tries to seduce her. He remembers that MacEnzie seemed very interested by Cuddy, he always asked about her, about what she likes, what she dislikes… And he had a strange expression in the eyes when he talked about her.

-Wilson! Don't be stupid! You saw this guy! Can you assert me that you trust him? House asks annoyed.

-Well… Maybe … I don't know… But why did you leave her there if you're so worried!

-You know Cuddy! When she decides something, you should rather get up early to make her change her mind! Do you think I should go to MacEnzie to see if she's fine?

-House! You've just talked to her! She said she was fine and was about to sleep! Try to relax and enjoy the race!

-She had a strange voice on the phone, she seemed to be relieved that I called. There's something weird, Wilson, House replies and paces around the room.

-House! Will you please sit down! You give me a headache!

-I can't!

-Then take a sleeping pill and go to sleep! We have a mission tomorrow! Take care and play with a little pirate full of energy!

-Yeah, you're right, it's just that…

-I know, House, you care about her and you're worried because she was a little uneasy to stay for two days by MacEnzie, but I'm sure that she and Rachel are fine and that they're sleeping … lucky girls! Wilson adds and yawns.

About 3 AM Wilson gives up and falls asleep. But House can't and remains the whole night thinking of Cuddy and of MacEnzie, jealousy and anxiety keep him awake and drive him crazy.

-Rachel, eat your cereals, please or you'll be too tired to play with House and Wilson, Cuddy says.

-But they're not good, mommy!

-Rachel…

_Forget your trouble, com'on get happy… _Who can call so early in the morning! Cuddy exclaims and rolls her eyes when she sees who calls.

-House! You know what time it is! she exclaims and pretends to be angry at him.

-Yes, it's 7.15 AM and I was sure that you and the little mushroom would be woken…

-And may I know why you're calling? she replies in a softer voice.

-Hm, I … I just want to know if you're fine and if you want me to come to drive you to the hospital, he says and feels a little idiot. Cuddy seems amused and fine. Wilson was right, he loses his self control when it comes about Cuddy.

-Oh, I see, and it's not because you were worried about me and Rachel, I suppose, she says ironically. But deep in her heart she's touching because it shows that House really cares.

-Well… no, why should I've been worried? You were just sleeping in the same house as a dangerous pervert, and that's not a problem because you're such an ugly woman that nobody dares to jump you, especially because of your big ass… he adds with a smile.

-You see, no reason to get mad and to worry…, she replies and smiles. … It's good to hear your voice, House, she adds.

-I come and take you in 10 minutes, get ready!

-Thanks.

And 10 minutes later, House arrives and finds Cuddy and Rachel waiting for him in front of MacEnzie's house. Cuddy wears her dark suit and he can see that she has a white top, she looks wonderful and House feels desire overrunning his body.

-House! Rachel shouts and gets in the car with a big smile.

-Hey, little pirate! Ready to storm Uncle Wilson's ship?

-Oh yes! the little girl replies and giggles.

Then House turns to Cuddy who looks at him and smiles.

-Hey, sexy girl! How are you? I see that you survived in this evil house! Did you miss me? he says with a lovely smiles.

-Hm, let me think of it… You were not there with me? I didn't even notice your were somewhere else. Certainly because this MacEnzie is so nice and so sweet! she says with a smile and teasing him.

-And where is he?

-Hm…He's sleeping…, she answers a little embarrassed and looks at the ground.

-Was the evening so tiring? House asks in a tone in which Cuddy hears some jealousy.

-Well, … sometimes some activities are exhausting you know…, she replies and gives him a glance full of lust.

-Well, if you want I can let you here with him, I take Rachel with me so you can be alone with your new toy boy, he replies angry and with eyes full of jealousy.

-House! I was kidding! I am teasing you! This man is a moron who thinks he's a Don Juan and can have all the women he wants…, she says irritated.

House smiles and tells her ironically: Wow! And you didn't fall for such a God of sex! Are you sick?

-House! That's not funny! He almost scared me last night…, she adds in a sulky tone.

-Really? House replies seriously and worried. What did he do? Tell me!

-Not now, House, I don't want that Rachel worries. House looks at her and sees her fear. But don't worry, everything is fine thanks your birthday gift, she adds in a soft voice and caresses gently his cheek. House looks at her surprised.

-My birthday gift? Did I offer you something? I can't remem… oh yes! I get it! No…, Cuddy, you didn't…, he adds with a smile and shining eyes. He's so proud of his girlfriend.

-Yes, I did, she replies with a smirk and gives him a lovely gaze.

-This man will pay to have mistreated you, he mutters. Then he starts the car.

Once in front of the hospital, he parks the car.

-Do you want me to go with you?

-No…, thank you.

-You're welcome, he replies with a smile.

-But…

-Yes?

-I'd like you to have lunch with me…, she says and gives him a tender look.

-Of course. I come at 1 pm. Have a nice morning sweety…, he adds and takes her hand.

-See ya…, she says and gets out of the car, then she walks around the car and comes to his side, bends over the window and gives him a soft kiss. House tries to deepen the kiss but she steps back and goes to the hospital not without giving him a seductive glance. He follows her with the eyes, turns to Rachel who looks at him intrigued and asks with a smile:

-So! Little pirate, ready to wake up Uncle Wilson? I've got a plan…

-Yes! Yes! Yes! Rachel replies delighted at the idea of waking Wilson.

-Let's go first buy some rubber balls, some rope, two pirate's hats and two cutlasses!


	16. Chapter 16

_Chapter 16: ready for a new chapter? be sure to be 18 years old before reading it, I tried to be gentle and not to expressive but…. Enjoy and leave comments._

It's 12.45 am, House is waiting for Cuddy in front of the hospital, sitting on a bench. He's lost in his thought and a smile hovers on his lips, he thinks of Cuddy, of Rachel, of what they mean in his life, he knows that this time he has no right to make mistakes: it puts him under stress and stimulates him at the same time, but he's more motivated than ever because he doesn't want to lose them one more time. He needs them in his life, especially Cuddy, and he's determined to keep them with him. And he knows that Cuddy wants it too, wants him more than ever too, and just this makes him happy and a better man. A gentle laughter escapes his mouth as he thinks again about the pillow fight of the morning with Wilson and Rachel. When he and the little girl arrived early in the morning at his apartment – after they got some pirate's props - , Wilson was still sleeping on the couch.

-Listen to me ship's girl Funnyface, he murmurs to Rachel. Look! he adds in a low voice and shows the couch with his sleeping friend. Here's the ship of Sir Wilson the brave, he has stolen our treasure – a treasure of chocolate cookies and lollipops- and we have to get it back.

Rachel nods and giggles, she loves playing the pirate with House. Okay, Daddy!

-Good! We're going to near slowly and silently the ship, then I go to the right and you go to the left, House keeps on and shows with his hand the direction to be sure that Rachel understands. Once we surrounded it, we fire at Wilson the brave rubber balls, then you jump on him with your cutlass and I try to catch him. Ok?

-Yes! Rachel answers with a big smile and very excited to storm Uncle Wilson.

-So let's go!

House and Rachel near slowly Wilson, who woke up a few minutes ago and heard them talking. He waits for them to attack him and is ready to counter attack with his pillow.

-Now, Funnyface! Fire at Sir Wilson! shouts House and begins to throw his rubber balls on Wilson's face. This one responds to House with his pillow, jumps out of the couch with a scary cry and tries to avoid the balls. He manages to reach the kitchen where he finds some eggs to fire at House and Rachel. But the little girl manages to near him and to hit him with her cutlass, Wilson tries to escape but House catches him, knocks him over, Rachel jumps on his chest and Sir Wilson begs for mercy and admits his defeat.

Rachel laughed and was very happy, House's heart melted, he's so happy to have her and Cuddy in the city, next to him. This time he won't fail, he'll prove to Cuddy that he's the man she wants, the man she needs, a father for Rachel, he'll show her that he deserves her.

House doesn't notice the man who observes him hidden behind a tree. A few minutes pass and Cuddy goes out. She looks around her and sees him. She heads toward him her hips waving gracefully. House remains sat appreciating the show with the glance of an expert.

-Stop! he exclaims. Cuddy stops surprised.

-What…?

-I need to catch my breath and my eyes need to recover from a wonderful shine…, he says with a sexy smile.

-House! she replies and rolls her eyes before sitting down close to him. He puts then his arm around her shoulders and she puts her head against his chest. They remain so in silence for a few minutes, then he says in a mysterious tone:

-May I suggest something?

-Yes, she replies and looks at him.

-We have two, well three options right now.

-Three options? House, don't forget that I'm working and that I have not a lot of time…

-But you're the boss! I'm sure that nobody will say anything if you take a few hours for the lunch…, he adds staring at her.

-A few hours! House, I can't! It's my first day as Dean of Medicine here, I have to be beyond reproach! I can't allow me to…

-Stop! Listen to me and don't waste your…hm our precious time. She nods. I explain you the different options: first, we go in a restaurant, eat and then you come back to work – well, that's the one I like the least. Second, we go to me, I undress you and we make love passionately – I love this one. And third, we go to me, I undress you, we make love passionately and then we eat – I love this one too, he adds with a smile, but it takes more time. Which one do you choose?

-Well, I am … hungry, she says the eyes full of lust.

-Hungry? He replies with a smile and caresses her cheek. Do you hunger for a … sausage? She rolls her eyes and chokes a laughter. A "House" made sausage, of course! he adds his eyes glittering with desire. Cuddy bursts out of laugh.

-I think you're right - as usual – I choose the third option, she gives him a soft kiss, gets up, takes his hand in hers and adds: Let's go, pretty sexy boy! House looks at her, smiles, gets up and follows her to his car.

Neither Cuddy, nor House has noticed MacEnzie. He was behind a tree and observed them. He's angry, very angry and jealous. House, he thinks, I won't let you take me Cuddy, she's mine now, last night was so wonderful, it was like a dream but I know she loves me, she's the most incredible woman I've ever known and she just goes with you because you scare her, she doesn't dare to say "no" to you, but don't worry my Cuddy, I'm going to free you from this madman. And tonight you will be with me and I will comfort you, and House will never bother you again.

On the way to his apartment, House asks Cuddy:

-By the way, can you tell me now what MacEnzie did last night and why you had to sedate him?

-Well… It's nothing, he… forget it.

-No, Cuddy, no, I won't forget it, tell me, I want to know, I need to know…, he says and gives her a quick look.

-Okay, she sighs, but promise me you won't do him anything!

-I promise.

-Last night, MacEnzie was … too much… insistent with me…

-What did he do exactly? House asks trying to contain his anger.

-He… he put his hands around my waist and wanted to dance – she sees how House clenches his fist and how he tenses up- … and when I "escaped" his embrace he took my hand to hold me, but that's all, House, she adds quickly.

-Really? Did you tell me all the truth, Cuddy?

-I swear House! Nothing happened!

-So why did you sedate him?

-Because… because I was afraid that he comes during the night… and harasses me again! Then I remembered you gave me these sleeping pills and… you know what happened then, she says but doesn't dare to look at him. She knows how he feels, she knows he's jealous, angry at MacEnzie and at himself because he left her alone with this guy, because he wasn't there for her, he wasn't there to protect her against this moron. House, House, she says softly. You don't have to feel guilty, it's not your fault! You warned me! And I didn't listen to you. Please, House, talk to me!

-I … I don't know what to say Cuddy, I'm … I'm sorry, I shouldn't have left you with him. I… I'm going to talk to Wilson, we'll find a solution, I'll pay him the hotel… but one thing is sure, you won't spend another night in his house! he replies and takes her hand, staring at her.

-Okay, she says and squeezes his hand. Are you living here? she adds showing a small building.

-Yes. I hope you're still hungry…

-More than ever…

-Then just follow me… he replies in an evocative tone.

He opens the door and they get in a spacious room with wide windows.

-What happened here? Cuddy exclaims.

-Hmm, well, don't pay attention on the disorder, we delivered a naval fight this morning, he replies and scratches his head a little embarrassed.

-Really, she adds with a smile.

-Yes, and your little pirate wasn't the sweetest, believe me! He laughs and Cuddy smiles at him, she loves when he's laughing.

-I'd love to listen to that great battle.

-Right now? Can't you wait … ? Cuddy smiles and rolls her eyes. Ok, I tell you briefly because I have other thing in mind, if you see what I mean… he adds giving her a seductive glance. So Captain Crankypants and ship's girl Funnyface had located the boat of Sir Wilson the brave and had decided to attack it at dawn. They neared silently the ship, surrounded it and when the Captain gave the signal, they stormed Sir Wilson who jumped in the air so scared he was! We fired rubber balls at him. He tried then to escape in the kitchen where he found some eggs that this traitor fired at us but finally we took him prisoner and he had to admit his defeat! House says with a triumphant smile and jumps next to Cuddy who looks at him with happiness in the eyes.

-And where is the little mermaid?

-With Wilson the brave and Princess Kate.

-Well, I hope that the captain isn't too tired…, she says and begins to unbutton his shirt. House puts his hands on her hips and draws her close to him. He leans and kisses softly her ear, then her neck, he smells her scent and deepens his kiss. She takes his shirt off and caresses his chest, arching against him under his kiss, shivering under the caress of his hands that are going slowly down and up on her back, pulling her even closer to him. House, she says in a breath. Cuddy, he moans as she brushes her lips on his neck, then on his mouth. He undresses her slowly while her tongue finds its way through his lips and begins a sensual dance with his tongue. They only stop kissing to catch their breath back, he takes her in his arms and carries her to the bedroom.

-I missed your touch, I missed to feel your skin on mine, I missed your kiss, your lips, your hands on me, I missed you so much House, she says and drags him on top of her, kissing him eagerly.

-I missed you too, Cuddy, he says smiling against her lips, kissing her deeply, pressing against her. His hands caress every part of her gorgeous body, he licks her neck, her nipples, her belly and her moans fill him with desire. She arches under his tongue, she presses her against him, she's short of breath, she takes his head in her hands and combs her fingers through his hair, House, House! Please… I love you Cuddy, I want you all, say you're mine, Cuddy! he moans as Cuddy's hands grab little Greg and massage it softly. I'm yours, House, she pants out, say it again, he repeats kissing her deeply, going inside her to make one with her, I'm … yours, she says biting his under lip, pressing her hips against his, moving in rhythm with her lover, intertwined with him, their bodies making one until they reach their climax. House wants to go out of her but she stops him:

-Please, don't… I'd like to feel you inside me a few minutes more. As an answer, he kisses her softly and she deepens the kiss once again. Finally she lets him go and they lay close to each other on the bed for a while, trying to catch their breath back and to calm down their desire.

-And now what? he asks wrapping his arms around her waist, drawing her against him and kissing her neck.

-Hm… I think I have to get dress and go to work…, she replies and turns her head to him.

-I knew it!

-What?

-I knew you'd say that… I shouldn't have asked…

-Don't be so upset, House!

-I don't want you to go… I want you to spend the rest of the day with me, he says and looks at her tenderly, caressing her cheek.

-And I want it too, but…

-I know, you have to go!

-Hm, before I go… You said a few hours earlier that you have something to eat here.

-Are you hungry? he asks surprised.

-Yes! All this "bedroom sport" gave me hunger.

-And I'm supposed to be the least romantic here! he replies smiling. I'm going to fix lunch.


	17. Chapter 17

_Chapter 17_

Meanwhile MacEnzie broods on his revenge. He's furious and well determined to get Cuddy back. I was too kind with her last night, tonight she will understand who the boss is, and this Dr. House too! I'm going to show him that he should never have challenged me, especially when it comes to women like Dr. Cuddy. As he thinks of her, of her beauty, of the sweetness of her skin, of her lips, his anger calms down. Fortunately none of his colleagues seem to have noticed his internal struggles. They just pointed out to him with a wink that he was very late this morning, what he answered smiling he had a restless night. His colleagues wanted to know more about it, and after they begged him, MacEnzie told them proudly that he "slept" – if they saw what he meant – with Dr. Cuddy. His colleagues couldn't believe it, they thought MacEnzie was lying. A little vexed, he decided to show them that Dr. Cuddy was crazy in love with him as soon as he met her.

-Hey! MacEnzie! Still dreaming? Dr. Scott asks him and punches him gently on the shoulder.

-Hm? What? What did you say?

-I said that you were still dreaming… hm, let me guess… of Dr. Cuddy?

-No, no, I …, MacEnzie replies and blushes.

-Your nose is growing, Scott says mockingly.

-Shh!

-He, he, MacEnzie has the hots for Dr. Cuddy, his colleague repeats in the hall of the hospital.

-Stop saying stupid things, MacEnzie replies amused and flattered.

-Don't blush MacEnzie, she's stunning, I'd love to have her in my bed, adds Dr. Laurence with a wink and a big smile full of allusions.

-MacEnzie has the hots for Dr. Cuddy! his colleagues now repeat in chorus and laugh.

-What the hell is this noise! they suddenly hear someone yell. They turn and see Dr. Cuddy. She looks wonderful but seems to be angry too and to wait for an explanation. Do you forget you're in a hospital? she adds in a cold voice. They all look down at their shoes, murmur some excuses and go back to work. Doctor MacEnzie, I want you in my office right now! she says irritated and heads to her office. MacEnzie remains a few seconds petrified, then he follows her trying to recompose a virile attitude.

-What happened? House asks to Dr. Scott.

-Oh, Dr. House, you're here, I didn't see you.

-Well, you know, we're in a hospital, I'm a doctor and I work here, do you remember? House replies sarcastically.

-Yes, sure, I'm sorry, I …

-Don't mind, it's ok, so what happened? I think I heard Dr. Cuddy?

-Yes.

-And why did she yell like a dragon?

- She… she was angry because we were teasing MacEnzie too much loud. House gives him an amused look.

-Really? You were teasing MacEnzie… and may I know why?

-Because he told everyone that last night he slept with Dr. Cuddy…

-Oh, I see… and do you believe him? House replies staring at Scott.

-I don't know, Dr. MacEnzie is a boaster and Dr. Cuddy is the new boss here, she's gorgeous and a lot of us would like to spend a night with her …

-Pay attention on what you go to say, House replies in a threatening tone. Scott looks at House surprised and a little scared.

-I… You…, Scott stutters.

-Dr. Cuddy and I are together, never forget it and spread the word around you! And for your information she didn't sleep with him, she sedated him! And she won't sleep with whoever excepted with me, House says and heads to Cuddy's office. I don't want her to be alone with this moron if he barks everywhere that he slept with her, he might be dangerous. But his pager rings, the ER may have a case for him. House hesitates a few seconds and decides to go to the ER. Cuddy is in the hospital, there are a lot of people around, MacEnzie isn't stupid, he won't do anything against her. And he needs a new case, a new puzzle to solve to forget a little the pain in his leg. He had thought that with the comeback of Cuddy, his pain would decrease, and effectively it had for a while, but her weird situation with MacEnzie is a source of stress, anguish and fear, and his leg hurts again.

-Ok, I'll do it…, Scott says to House's back. Wow! MacEnzie shouldn't have yelled he made love to , House seems to be very angry and I wouldn't like to be on MacEnzie's place, even if he's limping, House scares me. I'd rather explain the guys that they have to forget Dr. Cuddy…

-Dr. Cuddy, I'm sorry, you know the colleagues like to tease me, we like joking…

-Dr. MacEnzie, I don't care! Cuddy replies coldly, but anger fills her voice too. I just want you and your colleagues to behave like doctors in a hospital and not like students at the University, I won't accept prank. If you don't want to accept my rules, then I'll gladly accept your resign, she adds with a smile, waves in the direction of the door to make MacEnzie understand he has to go right now out of her office and without any contestation.

-But… Dr. Cuddy, he says and tries to touch her, yesterday you were so…

-I think you should go, she says firmly and gives him a black look.

MacEnzie looks at her surprised, but doesn't dare to add anything else and goes out. His colleagues were waiting for him.

-And…? What did she want? Scott asks with a smile. A passionate kiss? A sensual embrace?

-Did you calm her with your irresistible charm? Laurence adds mockingly.

-Shut up! MacEnzie replies and fails to contain his anger.

-Oh oh! The beauty seems to have the upper hand over the beast, Scott replies ironically.

-It seems that our MacEnzie just received a slap in his face! Dr. Cuddy seems to have forgotten how sweet you were last night, Laurence adds amused.

-I said shut up! MacEnzie replies.

-Maybe we can have a chance with her now that she dumped you like a sock! Davis says with a smile.

-You'd better not, MacEnzie says coldly and gives Davis a threatening gaze.

-Hey, it's a joke, Mac! Davis says. Calm down! Women are complicated, you know. It's her first day here, it's not easy for her, she has to prove us she's the boss...

-Yeah…, you may be right, MacEnzie says after a while, his anger gone.

-Of course, I'm right! Davis adds. I'm sure she'll apologize tonight when you'll be alone with her, don't worry…

-Yes…

-And it can be a good thing for you… if you get what I mean…, Laurence says.

-Yes! MacEnzie replies with a smile, thinking of Cuddy.

-Don't you agree, Scott? Davis asks.

-Hm, yes, yes, certainly.

-Well, I have some work to do guys, see you later, MacEnzie says and leaves his colleagues. He needs to think about a plan to get rid of House and to show Cuddy that she has to show him more respect. And I know what I'm going to do… he thinks with a devilish smile.

-Hey Scott! Davis says.

-Yes?

-You seem to know something about MacEnzie and Dr. Cuddy…

-Hm… MacEnzie is a liar.

-What? exclaim Davis and Laurence. Tell us!

-Well… I met Dr. House a few seconds after Dr. Cuddy send us back to work…

-And?

-And MacEnzie hallucinated his night with Dr. Cuddy, she sedated him… and you can forget her as a girlfriend…

-What did House tell you? asks Davis who fancies Cuddy.

-He told me that he and Dr. Cuddy are together and that if someone tries to ask her out, this someone will have problem with him… and I can assure you that he wasn't joking at all.

-Well, I knew that he and Dr. Cuddy were together but I thought it was over between them… Davis says disappointed. However, I don't understand why a beautiful woman like Dr. Cuddy is with a man like House.

-He has a certain charm and he's very charismatic, Scott replies. That's what the nurses say, he adds seeing the faces of his colleagues who are amazed.

-Maybe, but he's limping and I don't find him very friendly, Davis replies.

- And he can be a real jerk, Scott adds.

-I'm not afraid of him, Davis says.

-Do you think we should tell MacEnzie? Laurence asks.

-No, let him dream… and let us have fun, replies Davis with a wink.

Cuddy sits at her desk and is lost in her thought. Suddenly her door opens and House comes in.

-I see that you still don't know that you have to knock at the door and wait for me to say "come in", she says ironically.

-You know… the rules and I are not… good friends, he replies and smiles.

-What do you want? she asks and gives him a tender glance.

-Nothing…

-Really? Each time you storm in my office it's either because you want to practice a risky procedure on a patient, or because you want something … unusual for a hospital like a TV wide screen for your office… or…

-I just want to know how you're doing, he replies, sits on her desk close to her and gives her a tender gaze.

-I'm fine, I have a lot of work as you can imagine but it's ok.

-And MacEnzie? he asks and scrutinizes her face.

-What MacEnzie?

-I heard you yell in the hall…

-Oh! Some of your colleagues were too loud for a hospital, nothing very important.

-Hmm… Do you know what MacEnzie says everywhere in the hospital?

-No, she replies and tenses up a little.

-He tells everyone that he slept with you last night…, House replies and looks at her straight in the eyes. He can see how her eyes darken with anger.

-What? I can't accept it! He's going to hear from me! she says her voice filled with anger and stands up. House grabs her wrist and holds her.

-Cuddy, I … I need to know…, House says in a worried tone, and Cuddy can see jealousy and fear in his eyes.

-House! How can you only imagine…, she replies amazed and upset.

-Cuddy, I need to know, I trust you but…, he repeats and tightens her wrist a little more.

-No, House, no, you don't trust me…, she says in a low voice and looks sadly at him, she feels so hurt.

-I do, Cuddy, I swear I do, but I don't trust MacEnzie and he could have drugged you …, he adds torn up inside.

-I thought I could do this, I thought we could start again…because I love you and I know you love me… but I was wrong…, she adds and wipes some tears in her eyes.

-Cuddy… House says, lets her wrist and gives her an intense, but painful gaze.

-House, she says and looks at him straight in the eyes, **I** sedated MacEnzie and nothing happened between he and I, I don't like him, he's one of my employees and that's all, and I'm going to clarify the situation right now, she says firmly, gives him a painful glance and leaves her office. House remains on her desk, unable to move or to say something. He saw the pain in her eyes, he knows he hurt her, he knows he shouldn't have asked her but… but he can't help it.


	18. Chapter 18

_Chapter 18_

Cuddy needs to be alone for a while and she goes out in the park of the hospital. She walks and tries to calm down, to think of the situation, of House, of her, of her and House. It took her a long time to know what she really wants, to understand that she can't live without him, that he's the one for her… She forgave him the unforgivable, she wanted to believe HE has changed, she wanted to believe SHE has changed, she thought she could accept him for who he is, with his fears… she was in heaven since yesterday when she saw him at the airport, without to talk about the lunch time today… she never feels better than when she's in his arms, when she feels his skin above her skin, when their bodies are locked in a tender and sensual dance, when he's inside her and says her name… The memory of this early afternoon when he made love to her with so much tenderness, so much love and care… this memory makes their argument more painful. She can feel her heart bleeding, she feels so hollow, so sad and so hurt! Why did he do that? She finally sits down on a bench, locked in her misery, in her pain.

-House! What are you doing here? Where's Cuddy? Wilson asks and sits down next to House at the counter of the bar. He has a glass of whisky in his hand and stares at his reflect in the mirror. House! What happened? Wilson says and puts his hand on House's arm.

-I lost her, Wilson. It's over, she won't forgive me this time, I really screwed up, House replies in a low voice filled with despair, pain and sadness and then he empties his glass in one shot.

-What did you do?

-I lost her…, House repeats and takes his head in his hands.

-House, tell me what happened!

-MacEnzie barked everywhere he slept with Cuddy last night…

-And? Don't tell me you believe this idiot! Wilson exclaims afraid to understand what happened.

-Of course I don't believe him! House shouts.

-So what's the problem?

-I … well I…

-No! Don't tell me you did it! You have doubts and you asked her, am I wrong?

-Yes, I asked her… I trust her, Wilson, but… it was stronger than me, I couldn't help but asked her! House says desperate. Wilson feels so sorry for his friend. A few hours earlier he was so happy! House called him once Cuddy back at work to see if he and Kate can take care of Rachel until tonight, he wanted to make a surprise for Cuddy. And now…

-House, listen to me! Go back at the hospital and apologize to her. She always gave you another chance.

-Wilson! Do you think she'll accept my apology? You know her! No, this time I lost her … I don't deserve her, I … I think I should go away, far away from her… The only thing I manage to do is to hurt her, to make her unhappy… She'd be better without me…

-No, House! You know that's not the truth, she needs you! Otherwise can you explain to me why she came here, in this small city? House, no, don't leave, stay here, I'm going to talk with her, House!

But House doesn't listen anymore to Wilson, he's so desperate, his heart bleeds, his soul hurts, he has to leave… He walks in the streets and doesn't notice the two men behind him.

-Dr. House? one of them says.

House turns to see who calls him.

-Are you Dr. House? the other one repeats.

-Yes, who are you?

-Detective Grant, and this is detective Mitchel, we'd like to ask you two or three things, please, follow us to the police station.

-What is it about? Show me your badge, House replies angry.

-Hey, calm down or you're going to regret it, Mitchel says, handcuffs House and pushes him in a car.

-Hey, Dr. Cuddy! You seem … Is something wrong? Malcolm asks Cuddy and sits down on the bench next to her.

-Oh, Dr. Malcolm, no, no, everything's ok, I… I'm just a little tired…, she replies and tries to appear composed.

-Yes, I understand. If you have any questions about the hospital or if you need some help, just ask and I come, he says with a smile.

-Thank you.

-And…

-And? she asks intrigued by Malcolm's tone.

-How can I say that with tact? Hm… I heard some rumors about you and …

-And Dr. MacEnzie? she interrupts him, the voice filled with anger.

-Hm… yes, but I can see in your eyes and hear in your voice that these rumors are false and that MacEnzie once again made everything up…, he says and looks at her a little amused and embarrassed.

-What do you mean by "once again"? she asks and looks at him.

-I should have told you… I'm sorry but … Dr. MacEnzie is single as you know and he has a lot of hang-ups because of that… and when he meets a beautiful woman like you, he tends to… to try to seduce her… and he makes a love story with her up, even if he can't get what he wants. He hopes so that his colleagues will leave him in peace for a while, they're not really nice to him you know.

-Effectively, you should have told me, Cuddy replies kinda coldly.

-I'm sorry, but don't worry everybody here knows him and doesn't really believe him when he said he's dating someone.

-Well, I hope you're right, but I think I should rather have an explanation with him…, she says and stands up.

-Dr. Cuddy! Don't get mad at him, he's a good doctor and a nice man. You'd better forget all this, it will fade very quickly…

-Oh, you advise me to do nothing, did I understand well?

-Do what you think you have to, I just say that if you argue with him, the whole staff will wait to see who's going to win and that it can be harmful to you…

Cuddy's pager rings: problem with the MRI. I'm sorry, I have to go, see you later, Dr. Malcolm, she says and heads to the hospital. On the way, her cell phone rings, she looks at the call number and sees that's Wilson.

-Wilson, is there a problem with Rachel?

-No, no, she's fine and plays with Kate, I … can I come and talk to you?

-Wilson, I have a lot of work, we can talk tonight…

-Cuddy! It's about House…

-I don't want to talk about him Wilson! Sorry but I have to go, and she hangs up. Her throat tightens and she feels a weight of pain over her shoulders, why is it always so complicated when it comes to her and House?

-Ah! Dr. Cuddy! I'm Dr. Davis and I need the MRI for one of my patient but it doesn't work.

-Oh… should I take my tools and repair it? she replies ironically.

-Heu, no, no…

-So, why did you call me? Don't you know the procedure when a device is out of order?

-Yes, of course I do, but…

-So, fill the form, send it to the right department and wait for the fixer! she says, rolls her eyes and leaves.

-Dr. Cuddy, I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have disturbed you, but…, Davis says and follows her to her office.

-But? she stops in front of her door and turns suddenly to stare at him which makes him step back.

-Well, I admit it wasn't very smart of me, but … I wanted to meet you personally, I just saw you briefly this morning at the meeting and… I like to have good relationship with my colleagues…and …

-That's kind of you, so now you talked to me "personally" can you go back to work? she asks with a bored expression on the face and rolls the eyes.

-Yeess, yes, replies Davis upset. She's maybe stunning but she's cold and distant too, he thinks as he goes back to his office. Scott must be right, she probably has someone in her life, maybe House… he seems happier since she's here.

-Hey, Davis! How did you find our new boss? Laurence asks him.

-Stunning, cold, authoritarian and… I have to admit she's efficient and she has a quick wit, he answers and smiles. I like her very much and I think she's the boss we need. We're going to work good with her. And…

-And?

-And she isn't single, she has someone, maybe House, but I'm sure she has someone.

-Oh oh, and you say that because she didn't fall for you and your charm? replies Laurence amused.

-No, no, it's … I don't know how to explain it… But such a beautiful woman can't be alone.

Cuddy is on the parking about to leave the hospital when MacEnzie calls her. Cuddy tenses up and remembers what Malcolm told her one hour ago. She decides to act carefully.

-Hey, Dr. Cuddy!

-Dr. MacEnzie, she replies with a smile. What a surprise! Do you want to apologize to me?

-Apologize? MacEnzie repeats, very surprised.

-Apparently you don't understand what I mean…, she says and looks at him amused and irritated at the same time. This man seems to be so naive with women! Just like a teenager who tries to get a date.

-Well, if I did something that offended you, I apologize for it and I hope you accept my sincere apology, he replies and seems to be very sorry. And Cuddy can't help smiling.

-I want you to apologize because of what you yelled everywhere in the hospital…, she says and looks at him straight in the eyes.

-Whaaat? I don't understand, is it about this stupid joke with the colleagues?

-A stupid joke about you and me? I'm very angry after you because of the rumors you put about me…, she adds very coldly, trying to contain her anger.

-Oh… I see… You want it to be our secret for the moment, am I wrong? he replies with a smile.

-What secret? There's nothing between us! Do you understand ? she exclaims exasperated.

-If you want, ok, there's nothing between us…, he says bitter.

-So what did you want if you didn't want to apologize to me?

-I don't know if you remember but yesterday you accepted to come with me to make a tour of the city…, he says.

-Dr. MacEnzie! You've got a nerve!

-Please, Dr. Cuddy, then I swear, I won't annoy you anymore…

-Hmm… well I don't know if my friends will agree to take care of Rachel any longer…

-Oh, Dr. Cuddy please! You promised me!

-I don't remember to have promised you but… ok, let's go, I call my friends on the way to the city.

-Thank you, Dr. Cuddy, you won't regret it, MacEnzie adds with a smile, the city is small but very nice, he opens her the door of his car, and Cuddy wonders if she doesn't make a mistake by accepting MacEnzie's proposition… On the other hand, she needs to change her mind.


	19. Chapter 19

_Chapter 19_

MacEnzie exults, his plan works perfectly, House is at the police station and won't go out before 4 or 5 hours – that's what detective Mitchel told him when MacEnzie asked him a favor, what the detective agreed because MacEnzie saved the life of his daughter last year - and Cuddy is now in his car with him. Everything is ready for the next step and Cuddy will fall very soon for him, he has no doubt about it. And if she's too reluctant, he knows how to convince her… But right now, to gain her confidence, he plays the city guide and shows her some of the great places of the town.

-On the right you can see the Santa Maria Church and on the left the Washington Park, it's very big and there's a beautiful lake with a beach. In summer it's nice to come here and to swim. I'm sure your daughter will like it, he turns to Cuddy and says with a big smile.

-Yes, certainly, Cuddy replies, she feels bored and tired and the only thing she wants is to go home and to relax in a bath. A bath… This word calls a bittersweet memory in her mind: the first, well more exactly the second night, but the first night since she was Dean of Medicine of PPTH and House the head of the Diagnostic Department, the first night they spent together, after all these years of banter, of flirt, of the game "I move one step forward and you move one step back", after all these years of dancing around each other they were finally together, they made love again and again the whole night, and in the morning when they woke up, she told House he had to take a bath before to do her… and he prepared a magical bath with a lot of bubbles… and even if this bath burnt gently their skin, it was a great moment, full of tenderness… She can remember how he caressed her softly and rocked her, kissing her forehead, and they discussed about their relationship, what it really was or wasn't… Sorry, what did you say? she says surprised as MacEnzie stops the car near a lake.

-Are you ok Dr. Cuddy?

-Yes, I'm just a little tired, sorry, can we go now?

-Look at this! Isn't it beautiful?

-…. That's a wonderful place, she adds as she admires the landscape. Just in front of her a beautiful lake stretches its calm water, some swans swim lazily and the sunset gives the water a red-orange coloration, the song of the birds is the only thing you can hear, everything is quiet.

-Yeah, that's why I wanted you to see it. Come, we're going to walk a little.

-Well, it's already late and I'm very tired… But Cuddy can't end her sentence, MacEnzie is already opening her door and takes her hand.

-Com'on, Dr. Cuddy, just a few minutes…, he says looking at her with desire and still holding her hand firmly.

-No, MacEnzie, I told you, I'm very tired, all I want right now is going ho…, she stops her sentence as she catches MacEnzie's look, she can't say "going home" because his home isn't hers and she certainly doesn't want him to believe she considers his home as hers, she tries so to reformulate her sentence, well all I want and all I need is…, how to say to him that I only want to lay down on a bed without that he takes it for a proposition of some relation, she thinks in herself, I …

-What do you want Cuddy? he replies in a soft voice looking at her straight in the eyes, coming closer to her. She steps back in her seat and tries desperately to find something to say.

-… But Cuddy can't answer, this man scares her.

-You don't answer? Do you want to go home with me? he says with a strange light in the eyes.

-I … I'm exhausted, Dr. MacEnzie, and I need to rest, so if you can drive me to the "Rising sun hotel"…

-What? Why do you want to go to the "Rising sun hotel"? he asks amazed.

-I … I booked a room for me and Rachel and…, she replies and lowers the eyes.

-What? Why did you do that? You have a room in my house, you don't need to go to the hotel! he replies furious.

-Dr. MacEnzie…, Cuddy says as calmly as possible, don't get angry at me, I think it's better if your boss lives in a hotel until she gets her apartment, the staff of the hospital talked already and…

-And? Does it bother you? MacEnzie asks surprised, he didn't think of that, he didn't think Cuddy could be embarrassed to be with him… Why should she?

-Of course it bothers me! she replies and looks at the lake in front of her through the windscreen. She can't stand his look.

-But why?

-Because I'm the new boss, I need a little time to establish my authority… do you understand? she adds in a soft voice, hoping MacEnzie will believe her and leaves her in peace.

-Hmm, yeah maybe, but you're complicated, Cuddy… I don't understand what difference it makes that they know right now or in a week that we're together, but if you want to keep us secret… then it's ok for me.

-But MacEnzie, there's nothing between us…, she says, but MacEnzie doesn't listen to her. Cuddy can't believe what she's just heard, this man refuses to admit that there is nothing between he and she, she will need House's help to make him see the reality, House… where are you? What are you doing? Do you think of me? Don't think of him, Cuddy! she tells her, right now you have to act carefully in order not to offend MacEnzie, but how can I tell him that I just want to go to my hotel to take a bath and to rest without making him furious?

-So let's go for a little walk, there's no one here, we're alone, so let's have good time! MacEnzie says and pulls her out of the car.

-Ok, but let my hand, Dr. MacEnzie, Cuddy says a little afraid and goes out of the car. She decides to do what he wants in order not to make him angry or violent and hopes to meet some people on the way, but unfortunately for her the place seems deserted. MacEnzie nods, lets Cuddy's hand and they begin to walk, Cuddy trying to be as far as possible from MacEnzie.

-Wilson, it's House.

-House! Where are you, I'm worried.

-I'll explain you, can you come at the police station?

-At the police station? What did you do?

-Nothing, it's a mistake of the police, they think I'm a dangerous criminal who almost killed an old woman to take her purse. Wilson, I need you. I wait for you, hurry up!

And a few minutes later, Wilson arrives at the police station.

-House! What happened? he exclaims as he sees House with handcuffs in an office with two men who apparently are interrogating him. Wilson is about to open the door when an officer holds him back.

-Please, Mister, you can't go in, you have first to tell me your identity and then to wait, the officer tells him.

-I'm Dr. Wilson and I come to testify that this man is innocent! You make a terrible mistake!

-Please, Mister, control yourself, I'm going to see with the detectives.

After a few minutes and some looks in his direction, the officer comes back.

-Ok, Dr. Wilson, detective Grant wants to ask you some questions, please follow me in his office.

Wilson waits about 10 minutes before a man comes in. He's tall and quite handsome.

-Good evening, Dr. Wilson. I'm detective Grant and I have a few questions about Dr. House.

-What do you blame him for?

-I ask the questions, Grant says, sits down at his desk and invites Wilson to sit down. Do you know Dr. House?

-Yes, he's my best friend.

-Do you know if he already had problems with the justice?

-Well, what do you mean with "problems with the justice"? Wilson asks a little embarrassed.

-Was he already arrested?

-Yes, one time, Wilson answers in a low voice.

-Why?

-Because he let one detective with a thermometer in the butt a whole afternoon…

-He did what? Grant repeats amused.

-The detective believed he was ill, House is the most brilliant diagnostician in the world and he doesn't care about clinic duty, only the medical puzzle, only the medical mystery interests him, and your colleague had just a cold, but he insisted and House left him in the examination room the whole afternoon with a thermometer…Dr. House just wanted to make fun of him… I know it wasn't very smart but…

-Ok, ok, I see, Grant says and tries to contain his laughter. Nothing else? he adds.

-No, no, Wilson replies.

-Where were you yesterday afternoon about 3 pm., Dr. Wilson?

-I was at the airport with Dr. House, we had to pick up Dr. Cuddy and her daughter.

-You are sure? Grant says and stares at Wilson.

-I can swear it, Wilson says firmly.

-Ok, I write it, you sign it, I make some other confirmations and then Dr. House will be released.

-And that's all? Wilson asks surprised.

-Yes, that's all, Grant replies.

-And how long do we have to wait?

-It depends on the people I have to call…

-And can I talk to Dr. House?

-I guess you can, Grant says and leaves his office. A few minutes later, a policeman comes in with House.

-House, can you explain to me what happened?

-It's really weird Wilson, I don't really know what happened, I would say someone tried to trap me, to keep me locked in jail for some time, but why? And who?

-But why would someone trap you? You're not here since so long to already have enemies who'd be ready to get that far to harm you?

-I don't know Wilson, but I'm sure that someone wants to move me away… And I'm certain that the detectives know something about it, they didn't ask me anything, they just kept me here since 2 hours and I'm sure they would have kept me more if I didn't save one of them from a cardiac arrest.

-Really? How do you always find yourself in weird situations?

-Where's Cuddy, Wilson? I have a bad feeling, House says suddenly and Wilson can hear the tension in his voice.

-Cuddy? Well, she's with MacEnzie, he wants to show her the city…

-Wilson! Why did you let her go with this madman! He's dangerous! I just hope I can find her before it's too late! House gets up suddenly and opens the door. The policeman in front of it stands in his way and tries to push him back in the office.

-Mister! You can't go out! You have to wait for detective Grant!

-It's a urgency! House yells, I have to rescue my girlfriend: Let me go! She's in great danger! I have to go to rescue her, House keeps on yelling.

-What's this noise? Grant shouts.

-Detective Grant, House says, Dr. MacEnzie trapped me, Dr. Cuddy is in danger…

-Stop it! Grant says, I understand nothing, please, Dr. House, calm down and explain the story from the beginning.

-But we're wasting a precious time!

-You're going nowhere if you don't calm down and explain to me calmly why Dr. MacEnzie would have trapped you…

-House, calm down, we're going to explain them the whole story, they can help us to find her, Wilson says and puts his hand on House's shoulder.

-Ok, House finally whispers.

About half an hour later, Wilson and House stand on the sidewalk in front of the police station.

-House! Where are you going? You don't even know where he drives her! Let the police do its job!

House stops and turns to Wilson, the fear in his eyes, he says: You're right, but I don't want to lose her, I need her in my life and I must try to find her! She needs me, Wilson, and this time I won't let her down! And I'm going to ask one of his colleagues at the hospital. I'm sure that he's the one who tried to trap me, because I'm a danger for him, I stand in his way to get Cuddy! Wilson! Cuddy is in danger! I must rescue her! House shouts now, almost hysterical.


	20. Chapter 20

_Chapter 20_

-Dr. House! calls him detective Mitchel.

-What! House shouts.

-I heard you talking and …

-And what! I have no time to waste, my girlfriend is in danger, I must go and rescue her!

-Is Dr. Cuddy your girlfriend?

-Yes! House replies intrigued and worries more and more.

-I think I know where she can be…, Mitchel says in a low voice. I'm sorry, he adds and looks miserable.

-Where? Tell me where she is! House yells at Mitchel and shakes him.

-House! Control yourself! If you scare this guy to death he won't be able to tell you where Cuddy is! Wilson says and pulls House back.

-Thanks, Dr. Wilson, Mitchel says. Dr. MacEnzie told me to arrest you so he can be quiet with his girlfriend Dr. Cuddy, he told me you bothered her…

-But that's wrong! She's MY girlfriend, not his! And HE hassles her since he met her.

-I'm sorry, I know it now, I understand your anger and your fear…

-No! You can't! Why did you believe him, he's a dangerous man! House yells at Mitchel.

-I … I, stutters Mitchel, we know him and we don't know you, the story that he told us was plausible and we had to verify… I didn't really believe him, I just thought he wanted to have time to try to seduce Dr. Cuddy and…

-Where are they? House exclaims furious and desperate, hoping that Cuddy is still alive and above all that she's safe and that MacEnzie doesn't mistreat her, because he fears the worst with this man, especially if Cuddy resists him – what she certainly does because she's strong and like challenging men – House is certain MacEnzie can be violent toward her if she doesn't give him what he wants, and House knows perfectly what MacEnzie wants, he wants Cuddy, he wants her body and House feels a violent anger rising in him as he imagines what this madman can make to Cuddy, as he imagines this man kissing Cuddy, caressing her … It makes House sick and nausea overwhelms him.

-House! Are you ok, Wilson asks afraid to see House in a so bad state.

-Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, House replies in a low voice. Then he turns to Mitchel and asks: Where are they? Cuddy is in great danger. I have to rescue her, I have to be there for her, she needs me and this time I want to be with her!

- I think I know where they are, follow me!

House and Wilson follow him and he starts his car.

Meanwhile Cuddy feels more and more scared by MacEnzie, she doesn't dare to irritate him but doesn't want to do all what he wants, her situation isn't easy at all. MacEnzie is very happy to walk with Cuddy at his sides and he accepts to answer all her questions, thinking she wants to know him better, to know his interests, what he likes, so she can please him. But Cuddy tries to make him talk about the city, his work, his friends to gain time.

-And what do you like the most in the city? she asks and tries to make the most possible distance between he and she.

-Hm, let me think of it… maybe the art museum.

-The art museum? she replies surprised, she'd never have thought he can like art.

-Yes, I like to look at the paintings, especially at the nude paintings, he adds, turns suddenly to Cuddy, puts his hands on her waist and draws her close to him.

-MacEnzie! Go away from me! Don't touch me! she shouts hoping someone will hear her. Let me go! she says and hits MacEnzie with her fists to make him release her.

-You weren't so reluctant last night, my Cuddy, he whispers glaring at her and tightens her stronger. There's now only one centimeter between their face, Cuddy is petrified, MacEnzie's eyes reflect desire and he's much stronger than her, she can't move anymore.

-Laaa… last night? she finally articulates.

-Don't you remember how you kissed me, how you caressed me, how you begged for more?

-Noo, no. It's … It's impossible…

-And why? he asks, pressing his body against her, kissing her neck and caressing her back with one of his hand. Because of this bastard House?

-Because … there's nothing between you and I, I don't love you MacEnzie! I… why don't you want to accept it?

-Because that's not the truth, because last night was magic…, he says and kisses her ear.

-Last night was just in your imagination! she shouts and tries to push him away from her.

-What? What did you say? he asks a little shocked and rises his head to look at her straight in the eyes.

-Because I sedated you! she shouts, hits his crotch with her knee and manages to escape his embrace. Then she begins to run away. But it's not easy with a skirt and high heels.

-You … you sedated me! MacEnzie exclaims furious, holding his crotch because of the pain. But the anger is stronger than the pain and he runs after Cuddy, catches her and brings her down in the grass. He's now over her and she can't move, he holds her arms on the ground with his hands on each side of her head, and she can see his face just upon hers, she feels his breath, his body on hers, she hardly breathes. And now, Cuddy, what are you going to do? he says in an angry tone.

-….

-You don't answer? I'm going to tell you then, he says in a low voice kissing her neck, now we're going to make love, hard, because I want you so bad, it's driving me mad, I'm going to kiss you, to make you scream for pleasure and you will beg for more, I can assure you, little bitch, and he brushes his lips on hers but just then she turns the head and he can just kiss her cheek.

-Let… me… go…, MacEnzie! she shouts still hoping someone will hear her, trying to move, to escape but without any success.

-You wanna play with me? But you know that I'm stronger than you … What do you think of this? he says, taking Cuddy's hands in one of his above her head in the grass, and with his other hand he goes slowly down from her head to her breast where his hand stops and remains, caressing her. Cuddy tries to move, again, but the body of MacEnzie is too heavy for her and she has to undergo his caresses, it makes her sick but she can't do anything. She feels some tears rolling on her cheek.

-House! House! she shouts, House! She doesn't know why she calls him, but to say his name gives her courage and hope. House!

-Don't waste your energy to call him, he's in jail and can't come to rescue you. Don't be stupid and admit that I'm better than he.

-No, no, no! she shouts afraid of the idea that House can be in jail. What did you do? Why do you hate him?

-You don't understand?

-Please, MacEnzie, let me go, let me go…, Cuddy says slowly and cries.

-House is a jerk, a looser, a junkie! He's not a man for you, you deserve a better man; and this man is me! he adds in a tone that admits no contestation.

-MacEnzie, you're completely insane! Let me go! I don't love you! I'll NEVER love you! LET ME GO!

-Stop it now! MacEnzie shouts and caresses her breast again, but more brutally this time, Cuddy can't help but moans, what drives MacEnzie more crazy, you see, I told you you'll beg for more, my Cuddy and he kisses her brutally, trying to go through her lips with his tongue but Cuddy resists. His caresses go more and more forward, she cries and tries to push him away from her but she's exhausted, she has no more strength, she tries a last time to push him away from her, to make him let go, to escape, but he's too strong and his desire gives him the strength of ten. She's about to give up, a flood of tears breaks out on her cheeks and suddenly, she feels no more MacEnzie's body on her, there's nothing more on her, and she curls up on herself in fetal position. And she cries silently, her body shaken with sobs. MacEnzie's hand was about to go down when House seized him brutally. And he shakes him now violently.

-You're going to pay for what you've done to her, House says furious and punches violently MacEnzie. This one was so surprised that he does nothing to avoid House's fist which hurts him on the face, MacEnzie hears a crack, feels a violent pain in his nose and falls in unconsciousness. Then House goes to Cuddy but doesn't dare to touch her, he doesn't know exactly what MacEnzie has done to her.

-Cuddy, he says softly and puts gently his hand on her shoulder. She jumps and wants to get up to run away, but House holds her tight in his arms, draws her close to him and caresses her softly, talking to her in a very soft voice, rocking her slowly. Everything will be ok now, I'm here, Cuddy, I will take care of you, I promise, I will take care of you Lisa… and he kisses her forehead. They remain a long time so, close to each other, Cuddy's body still shaken with sobs, House's embrace protecting her. He sings a song just for her and Cuddy slowly calms down.

"_I know that the bridges that I've burned along the way_

_Have left me with these walls and these scars that won't go away_

_And opening up has always been the hardest thing_

_Until you came_

_So lay here beside me, just hold me and don't let go_

_This feeling I'm feeling is something I've never known_

_And I just can't take my eyes off you"_

-House, she says still crying, I … I'm sorry…, and she snuggles up to him.

-Don't be sorry, it's not your fault, you couldn't know MacEnzie will … try to …., House decides finally this word rather than "rape" this horrible verb, because he refuses to think that MacEnzie raped Cuddy, he's almost sure he arrived just in time to avoid the worst.

-House, I was so scared, I … it was a real nightmare…, she whispers still crying and comes closer.

-Don't worry, Cuddy, it's ok, I'm here now, I'll always be here for you, House replies, feeling a huge anger toward MacEnzie, he really hopes this guy didn't rape Cuddy. But to be sure, he has to ask her… and he's afraid of her reaction. Wilson who observes his two friends caught House's look and understood House's struggle.

-Cuddy, Wilson says and nears his friends, the detective Mitchel here has a very important question to ask you.

Cuddy doesn't dare to turn to Wilson, but she answers still the head against House's shoulder: No, Wilson, you can tell detective Mitchel that MacEnzie didn't have time to rape me, House arrived just in time. House is about to react, but Wilson makes a sign with the hand to stop him.

-Cuddy, I know it's painful for you, but what did he exactly do to you? Wilson asks softly, Mitchel next to him and writing everything.

-He forced me to get out of the car then to walk, he embraced me but I managed to escape him, he then ran after me… He… he brought me down in the grass, then he…, she tries to explain but she can't go further, she is so ashamed.

-Cuddy, you have to tell detective Mitchel so MacEnzie will go in jail, Wilson says. And House can be relieved, he thinks in himself.

-He kissed me, caressed me, and was about to … , once again she can't go further, she just cries and sobs. After a while, she speaks again: he was about to go to … House, I swear you, he didn't even touch me , I swear… she adds in a pleading voice. I'm so sorry, House…

-Shhh, Cuddy, don't worry, I believe you, I trust you, don't worry, I know you resisted him because you're strong, and because… you're MY girlfriend, the woman I love, House replies in a soft voice, relieved now that he knows that MacEnzie didn't get what he wanted, that he knows that MacEnzie failed to rape her, that he didn't even touch her sweet skin. Then he takes her chin in his hand so to look at her straight in the eyes: I love you, Lisa Cuddy, and he kisses her softly and deepens slowly his kiss. And this time, Cuddy opens her lips; and lets House's tongue in. She feels better now, she knew he'd come to rescue her, she knew he'd find her and save her. He had always been here by her sides when she needed him, even if he was stoned he was with her, the last time when she had her kidney problem he went back on drug to be there for her, to have the strength to support her, to lift her mood up, to give her hope and courage. Of course it's uncommon, of course she didn't understand it at the time and she was very angry at him, and then she felt guilty because he went back on drug because of her. But this House, this is the man she loves…. They kiss passionately and stop only when they can't help but catch their breath back.

-I love you, Gregory House, she says and smiles.

They hear some moans and turn the head to see Mitchel who makes MacEnzie get up and handcuffs him before he drives him to his car.

-I have called a car to take you back in the city, I'm going to drive this guy in jail, we'll need your evidence, Dr. Cuddy and I hope you're going to lay charges against him, he adds and stares gravely at Cuddy. She nods slowly.

-Thanks, House replies. So, I had a surprise for you, little sunshine, he says to Cuddy with a smile, but I don't know if you want to see it after all you've been through tonight…


	21. Chapter 21

_Chapter 21_

Cuddy gets up, and so does House. They're waiting for the police car that Mitchel called for them. Wilson looks at them, thumb up toward House with an interrogative look, waiting for a sign.

-A surprise? Cuddy says intrigued. House will never cease surprising her, even in the worst moments.

-Yup! But I'd understand if you refuse it … though I really hope you'll accept to come with me, he adds with a little grimace.

-Well… I don't know, I'm exhausted, House, the only thing I want and need is a bath, a warm bath, and then… a tender Doctor to take care of me… to heal my wounds…, she adds with a lovely smile.

-Well, that's not the program which I had planned but… it's great too, he says and smiles. You're so beautiful, Cuddy, men can be crazy, you have to be careful, he says and kisses her forehead.

-Hey! I don't want a father! I want a man, a lover! she replies and rolls her eyes.

-So, do you want my surprise?

-It depends… Do I have to attend a race of Monster trucks, or drive go kart or break in the house of one of your patient or…?

-Stop, stop! Nothing of that! What do you take me for? House replies pretending to be offended. I have changed, you know! I'm a real gentleman now, I know how to please women, he says and winks.

-Oh really?

-Seriously, Cuddy, come with me, I promise you won't regret it.

After a while, she says: You know, the last time a man told me that, it almost ended really badly for me…

-What? House asks surprised.

-MacEnzie told me exactly that…, she replies and lowers the eyes, feeling ashamed.

-Oh… well …. If you don't want to… I understand, House says sadly. He looks at Cuddy, she's gorgeous but she seems so fragile at this time… The only thing he wants is to make her feel better, to make her forget all these horrible times she went through because of this dangerous moron.

-Okay, I go with you…, she finally says and looks tenderly at him, but…

-But?

-What about Rachel?

-Don't worry, Kate and I have planned to go to the movies with her, Wilson replies.

-Are you sure it won't disturb your projects for tonight? Cuddy asks and looks at Wilson.

-No, don't worry, have fun! he says, you deserve it, both of you, he adds. And…

-And? they ask.

-And if you need some more time alone, for example a night… then I think that I and Kate can… take care of Rachel until tomorrow…, he replies, lowers his eyes and scratches the back of his head, a little embarrassed. House and Cuddy look at him and smile.

-This guy is sooo nice! House says. Of course, we accept your proposition, he adds rapidly.

-House! Cuddy exclaims. Wilson needs some private moment with Kate too!

-But that's him who suggests to take Rachel with him for the night, not me! House replies with the face of a kid who tries to move his mother in order to obtain what he wants.

-It's ok, Cuddy, don't worry, Kate likes kids very much and Rachel is very sweet, they get on well with each other.

-Then… I think that I've no choice but spend the whole night with my favorite pain in the ass…

-So let's go! Here's our cab! House says and pulls Cuddy's arm. Wilson gets in the passenger seat, Cuddy and House on the back of the car. Nobody speaks on the way to the city. Once at the police station they wait for Kate and Rachel, Cuddy needs to see her daughter.

-Rachel! she says as she sees her.

-Mommy! The kid replies and hugs her mother. Then she turns to House: Daddy! And she hugs him too. Are we gonna play the pirates again?

-Well, little mushroom, tonight you're going with Kate and Uncle Wilson to see a pirate movie…, House says.

-Yes! Yes! Yes! Rachel replies and jumps for joy. Suddenly she stops: But you and mommy won't go with us?

-Rachel, my sweetheart, Cuddy takes the little girl in her arms, House and mommy have to … do some work, we have a lot of things to talk about and Uncle Wilson suggested that you go with him and Kate to the movie, but… if you prefer you can stay with mommy…

-No! I want to go to the movie, I don't like when you and Daddy talk together…I'm bored because you don't play with me…

-Rachel, would you like sleeping at my house? Kate asks her.

-Mommy, Rachel turns to Cuddy, the eyes full of hope, can I sleep at Kate's house? Please!

Cuddy is a little surprised but Rachel seems very happy at this idea and she needs a night alone with House, she missed him so much these last weeks that Wilson's suggestion couldn't have come at a better time. Ok, sweetheart, you can sleep at Kate's house, but you have to promise me to be a nice girl, ok?

-I promise, mommy! And Rachel hugs Cuddy.

Then Wilson, Kate and Rachel leave and House and Cuddy remain alone on the sidewalk. House looks at Cuddy, then he nears her and embraces her tenderly.

-Cuddles, he says softly and kisses her forehead, if you want we can go to me and just rest, I can make you a bath and then you can relax and try to forget this evening…

-House, she replies softly, puts one hand on his neck, draws him to her and kisses him. What about going home, having a bath and then you can show me my surprise?

-As you wish, sunshine, he says and kisses her tenderly. My car isn't there, we're gonna take a cab. Cuddy nods and House waves to a taxi. Half an hour later, they're at House's home.

-Do you want to drink something? he asks.

-Maybe a coffee.

-A coffee now? You won't gonna sleep!

-But why do you think I want to sleep? she replies with a smile and lust in the eyes, I have other projects for tonight if you see what I mean. She brushes past him and goes to the sofa by waving her hips gracefully. House appreciates and a smile lights up his face.

-You know that I love your big ass, Cuddles…

-I know…

-Ok! Can you make some coffee while I make a magical bath?

-Hm, House would you mind if I make a bath and you make some coffee? House stares at her. I remember the last time you made a magical bath, it burnt my lady parts, so…

-Ok, I make some coffee… The bathroom is the second door on your left.

-Thanks. Cuddy gets up and goes to the bathroom. She runs the water and looks for bath oil, she opens a first cupboard but only find towels, she opens then a second cupboard. There she find some bath oil, but she also finds 3 bottles of Ibuprofen, a syringe and 2 ampoules of morphine. Her eyes darken and her heart skips a beat. She didn't hear him coming, he stares at her and she feels then the weight of his eyes on her back. She jumps a little and turns to face him. They look at each other without saying a word. He can see in her eyes the anxiety and the fear, and maybe some feeling of betrayal and compassion. His eyes are reflecting his pain and his despair, the fear of losing her one more time.

-Cuddy/House… they say at the same time. Please believe me, that's not what you think, he says.

-House, I know your leg hurts like hell but… I thought you were done with drugs, you told me you made great progress to relieve your pain thanks to your therapist, your physical therapy and Ibuprofen… and I believed you…

-Cuddy, please, listen to me, I swear I'm not on drugs, this is just … a kind of escape, it reassures me to think that in case I can't deal with the pain, I have something in the last resort, if nothing works… I… believe me, Cuddy, please, I … , but House doesn't know what to add, he's so desperate, so sure she won't believe him, he's certain she will dump him once again and this time he won't get her back because it's the last straw…

-House, she says gravely, I love you, I know you love me, I know I cannot live without you, I want to believe that I can deal with your problems, with your pain, but last time I thought I could do this and… and in fact I couldn't… She stares at him, her eyes are wet, a tear rolls on her cheek.

-I don't know what to say to convince you that I'm NOT on drugs… You know that I'm the most screwed up person in the world…

-I know…

-And you also know that I may never fix myself…

-I know…

- But I swear, Cuddy, I'm NOT on drugs, I once believed that people don't change, that we are who we are once and for all, but… Cuddy, YOU CHANGED ME, I'm not the same since we got together, even after the break up I never came back to the old me, I thought I was still the same screwed up man but I'm not, my usual ways to escape the pain didn't work, the only thing I could think about was you, even the medical puzzles didn't have the same taste after you, they didn't manage to light my mind and my pain… Only you can soothe my pain, my wounded soul, my bleeding heart… tell me, what can I do to convince you…? House says and looks desperately at Cuddy.

-House, I … I want to believe you, I… House, I'm feeling dizzy, I… House, help …me… Cuddy collapses slowly on the ground looking desperately at House.

-Cuddy! Cuddy! What happens to you? Where does it hurt? Cuddy! Talk to me, please, stay with me! While trying to make her regain consciousness, he examines her, her pulse is really weak, she needs to go rapidly to the hospital. House dials 911 and tries to find what's wrong with Cuddy while waiting for the ambulance. But his judgment is distorted by his feelings for Cuddy. House, you have to analyze the symptoms, to forget that this patient is your girlfriend, House, concentrate on the medical puzzle!

_Weoweoweoweoweo_… knock! knock! knock!

-Come in, we're here in the bathroom! Hurry up!

When the emergency workers come in the bathroom, House gives them a report as detailed as he can about Cuddy's state.

-Female, 43 years old, weak pulse, she collapsed suddenly, no other symptoms, except that she had very hard times this evening, she was stressed… House don't want to tell them that she was almost raped by MacEnzie. And she's the new Dean of Medicine of the Apton hospital, so take care of her…

-Her blood pressure is very low, did she bleed or hurt something? Did she have problem to breath or…?

-No, not that I know… She must be taken to the hospital, there I can do more tests to find what she has!

-Are you a doctor?

-Yes! I'm Doctor House, hurry up!

-Ok, let's go.


	22. Chapter 22

_Chapter 22_

On the way to the hospital, House and the emergency man with him and Cuddy in the ambulance try to "wake up" her, but her state worsens. She makes a cardiac arrest and House has to use 4 times the defibrillator before succeeding in restart her heart, but her pulse is still very weak and her blood pressure very low.

-How long before we reach the hospital? he asks worried.

-About 2 minutes.

-Can't you go faster? Her state worsens!

-I'm doing the best I can, I don't think it would help her if I crash the ambulance, would it?

House doesn't answer, Cuddy has just opened her eyes and looks at him.

-Cuddy, don't worry, you're gonna be ok, I promise…

-House… she says in a breath, I …, but again she loses consciousness.

-Cuddy! Cuddy! Noooooooo! House shouts and looks at the monitor, her heart beats slowly, but it beats.

Suddenly, the ambulance stops, the doors open, Cuddy is immediately taken in the intensive care, House at her side and ordering to run several tests. And now one of the most difficult moments is ahead of him: he has to wait the tests results, hoping Cuddy will wake up, smile and give him a lovely glance… If only my team was there… House paces up and down, frantically, in Cuddy's room, trying to find out what's wrong with Cuddy, trying to remember how she was during the day… until she collapsed in his bathroom… trying to find a sign which can explain why she's lying here in this hospital bed… Without exactly knowing how, he finds himself waiting for Wilson to answer his call. He's about to hang up when he hears his familiar voice.

-Wilson on phone.

-Wilson, it's House. I …

-House! What happened? House!

-Wilson, it's Cuddy…

-What? Did you make something to…

-She collapsed and she's now at the hospital in the intensive care, she still didn't regain consciousness…

-Oh my God! House, do you want me to come or to do something? Wilson asks worried. He's worried about Cuddy, but also about House, the last time Cuddy was ill and House thought she might die, he went back on vicodin and...

-Wilson, I… take care of Rachel. And House hangs up. He thought he heard Cuddy, but as he nears her, he can see that she's still unconscious. He slowly holds his hand out shyly, he barely dares to brush Cuddy's cheek, her skin is so sweet… but it's warm too, too warm, he looks at the screen above her bed. New symptom: fever. Maybe she has an infection. That would be good news. House rings for a nurse. While waiting, he takes a blood sample from Cuddy.

-She has fever, give her some antipyretic and broad-spectrum antibiotic and bring this to the lab, I want them to test it for an infection…

-And why don't you go yourself? the nurse replies kinda harshly. House stares at her and finally says:

-Because I'm the Doctor and you are a nurse! And because the patient here is your boss.

-I do it for her, not for you, she replies and leaves.

House remains with Cuddy, still trying to analyze her symptoms, to make a diagnostic, without any success. Two hours pass, House is sitting in a chair and holds Cuddy's hand, just as she held his hand many years ago. But at this time, he didn't want to admit his feelings for her, he didn't want to see that she was in love with him… no more than she didn't tell him what she really felt for him, she hid behind a kind of feeling of friendship, both found it so more comfortable… both were afraid of losing the little they had, this special bond they shared…. He remembered each time they bantered with each other, each time they flirted even so slightly, each time the sexual tension between them threatened to explode the walls they built around them to protect them… Finally Dr. Davis comes with Cuddy's tests results.

-Dr. House, I'm Dr. Davis. I'm … sorry, I know that you and Dr. Cuddy…

-Do you find something? House asks trying to keep his mind on his case.

-No, I'm sorry, the blood tests didn't show much. They're all negative.

-Show me!

Davis gives House the tests results, House glances through them, he notices that the level of CRP and troponin is slightly high.

-We must have missed something! Or we didn't look for the right thing… What for infections did you test?

-Well, the traditional infections…

-We have to run other tests! Of what do you think when I tell you: loss of consciousness, cardiac arrest, fever….?

-I … I don't know… I'm going to run other tests…, Davis answers, surprised and embarrassed. Then he leaves quickly the room.

House takes his head in his hands and rubs his eyes, he's exhausted but he has no time to waste with sleep, Cuddy's state seems to be stable at the moment but… WHYYYYY! He suddenly yells and hits the wall with his fist. He can't lose her now, she has no right to die, to let him and Rachel alone! I need you Cuddy! Rachel needs you! You can't die now! he tells her and comes to her bed, taking her hand in his. We can have great times together, I have changed, I made a lot of efforts, Cuddy, just for you, because of you I want to be a better man, I want to show you that you were right to believe in me all these years, to trust me, to never let me down… thanks to you I begin to believe I have a right to happiness like everyone on this planet, thanks to you and Rachel I have a goal besides solving medical puzzles…Cuddy, I beg you, don't die… House sits down on the chair near Cuddy's bed, still holding her hand, looking at her, some tears begin to fall from his eyes, but he doesn't care, the only thing he wants is that Cuddy wakes up. He watches over her the whole night and eventually succumbs to the sleep in the first lights of dawn.

-I think you need a coffee, House, says a familiar voice. House jumps and wakes up. He can't believe it! In front of him, a coffee in the hand, Chase stands, and behind him House sees Foreman, Thirteen, Taub and even Cameron is here! His team is here!

-What … what are you doing here? House finally says. What time is it?

-Well, it's almost lunch time. And we have some days off to take and Wilson told us Apton is a great town, so…we're here, replies Chase.

-I thought you could need your team, so… I called them and…, Wilson adds.

-Thanks, House says in a low voice and lowers the eyes. Then he stands up and asks with a little smile, trying to make a joke: Why don't you bring me a cookie or something to eat?

-How is she? Foreman asks.

-No apparent evolution: she's still unconscious, with fever…

-What about the tests? Thirteen says and nears House to look at him straight in the eyes.

-ECG and echocardiography showed no conclusive abnormality, blood tests came back all negative… I … I don't know what's wrong with her… House adds and leans against the window. His fellows look at him, he seems exhausted, worried, in pain… he limps more than usual.

-Why do you think it's her heart? Cameron asks.

-Well, I … I suppose because it's the most obvious cause, everything's normal except that she had a cardiac arrest…, House replies in a low voice, still looking outside.

-She was also very tired, you know…, Foreman adds. House turns to look at him.

-What? What did you say?

-I said she was very tired and kinda depressed, Foreman repeats and stares at House, but this one remains silent, he just lowers his head, feeling guilty… because he had an idea about why Cuddy was depressed and maybe overstressed too.

_Bibip bibip bibip_

-She has tachycardia! I give her some xylocaïn, Chase says. They all hold their breath and wait for Cuddy's heart to react and to get back to a normal rhythm, which it does a few seconds later.

Cameron looks at House, then she takes the file of Cuddy and the tests results. Did you notice that her level of CRP and troponin is high?

-It's only slightly high, it's not really a sign…, House replies staring anxiously at Cuddy and holding her hand. "Cuddy, please, wake up, don't leave me alone, I need you…" he whispers.

-It can be a sign of heart failure or…, Cameron says.

-Yes or something else! House shouts. That's why I ran tests for her heart.

-She probably also has an infection, adds Taub.

-Yeah, but which one? asks Chase.

-Foreman and Cameron, go to book the MRI, Chase, make a scan of her abdomen, Thirteen and Taub, run other blood tests and find this infection… House orders in a sad voice, barely audible. His fellows give him a quick look and go to run the tests.

House and Wilson remain alone with Cuddy, none of them speaks. House leans against the wall and looks at Cuddy. I think you should go to Kate and take care of Rachel, House says finally.

-Yes… But I think you should go home, take a shower, change your clothes and eat something. I stay with her, House, and your team will run the tests… she'll be fine, Wilson replies and puts one hand on House's shoulder.

-No… if she wakes up, I want to be here, I want her to see me here by her sides.

-At least go to the locker room, take a shower… if you want I can go home and bring you back some clean clothes…

-Ok, let's do that, House says and nears Cuddy's bed. Her fever is gone thanks to the antibiotics, but her state doesn't really improve.

-I come back soon, Wilson says and leaves.

Meanwhile, Foreman and Cameron finally managed to find a place for the MRI having insisted for a long time and they meet the other team's members in the hall.

-How do you find him, Cameron? Taub asks.

-I don't know… I have the impression that something has changed in him, I … I never thought he could show so much care for someone else as himself. What happened to him?

-Yes, he changed, he changed a lot, Thirteen adds. And…

-And? Foreman, Chase and Taub ask at the same time.

-After he picked me up from the jail, we spent a few days together…, she says, and he eventually talked to me about him and Cuddy, what he said wasn't really relevant, but his voice, his eyes… well, he loves her, I mean he really loves her, it's as if she was a part of him…

-He was devastated after she broke up, he took a self-destructive road, he behaved dangerously and almost died with his stupid clinical trial, Chase adds.

-And then he ran his car into Cuddy's dining room…, Foreman completes.

-What a mess between both of them! Cameron says. I mean, it's obvious they had feelings for each other since many years and…

-And they screwed it up, Taub adds. As you know, House isn't really good in relationship…

-Cuddy isn't more, Thirteen adds. However, if they have a chance to get back together, we have to help them, and to begin we have to find what's wrong with Cuddy.

-You're right, Chase replies. What about an amyloidosis?

-We have to make a biopsy to prove it, replies Foreman.

-I'll do it, Chase replies.

-Why not a lupus? says Taub.

-Has she joint pains? Cameron asks.

-We don't know…

-Let's go and run the tests! If any of you has an idea, just text it to the others, ok? Thirteen says. And they agree.


	23. Chapter 23

_Chapter 23 : well I'm not a doctor, so please don't be too hard with me if my hypothesis with Cuddy's disease are not always plausible, I made some researches but… Well however, I hope you'll enjoy this short chapter._

-Aww! Cuddy moans.

-Cuddy! Where does it hurt? House says as calmly as he can, caressing tenderly her cheek.

-House, I … my chest hurts… I… aww … my belly hurts too… House…, Cuddy manages to answer. Her face is distorted with pain, her eyes seem to implore House to give her something to soothe the pain.

-I can't give you morphin because we need to run other tests to find what's wrong with you, Cuddy, I'm sorry. But as soon as we finish, I'll give you some… House replies and holds Cuddy's hand tight. Cuddy nods.

-Hm, can I make the scan of your abdomen? Chase asks and nears Cuddy. House looks over Chase's shoulder, suddenly he stops his fellow.

-Here, come back to her liver…

-Yup! … hey, what's this?

- It seems to be a hepatic congestion…, House replies the eyes locked on the monitor of the scan. Then he looks at Cuddy, she writhes in pain, beads of sweat pearl on her forehead, she's very pale.

-It could be in connection with her heart failure, what do you think? Chase asks.

-Maybe… we have to do a biopsy to be sure.

-Hm, before you do the biopsy, we have to make the MRI, Foreman says on the threshold of the room. Cameron stands there too and looks at House, trying to guess what he thinks at this time. And she can see a huge despair, the fear of losing the woman he loves and maybe some glimpse of hope too, she sees a broken man, but also a man ready to fight to save the one he loves. She hardly recognizes House.

House nods and looks at Cuddy that Foreman and Cameron take to the MRI room. He feels a hand on his shoulder, Chase tries to comfort him:

-Don't worry, we're gonna find what's wrong with her, she's gonna be ok.

-I hope so…

-Cuddy, try to relax and don't move…, Foreman says.

Cuddy is ready for the MRI, she knows she has to be perfectly still, but she feels so bad, the pain is so strong…

-Do you think that she loves House? Cameron asks while looking at the screen in front of her. Foreman turns to look at her.

-Why do you ask? It's obvious that she loves him…

-Yeah, I know, I meant do you think she loves him for who he is, with his defaults, his chronic pain, his drug addiction, or does she love the image of him, the idea of him that she has since the Med School?

-Excuse me but I don't understand you, are you still attracted to House?

-No! Of course not! Cameron replies. Foreman looks at her, he doesn't believe her.

-Don't fool me, Allyson, everyone knows that you had the hots for House…

-Hey, look! Here, her heart, that's some diffuse nodules, isn't it?

-Yeah, it looks so…

-Myocarditis?

-Maybe … What about an endocarditis?

-We have to run new blood tests to confirm it…

-Let's do it!

Foreman and Cameron take Cuddy back to her room, House has left.

-My eyes are burning, Cuddy says breathless in a low voice.

-Let me see, Foreman says and nears Cuddy to examine her eyes.

-A new symptom? Thirteen asks and comes in.

-I guess yes… Come and look at this, Foreman replies and moves slightly back to let Thirteen go to Cuddy.

-I'd say she has conjunctivitis… but why? I don't know, it's weird, it doesn't fit with the other symptoms…

-Has she swelling of the lymph node near the ear? Taub asks.

-Hm… maybe but it's hard to tell… Why do you ask? Do you think of something?

-Yes, that could be Parinaud's oculoglandular syndrome…

-And?

-And she can have a cat scratch disease, which could explain her heart problem…

-So her heart problem would be an endocarditis? Chase suggests.

-And why not a lupus? Cameron adds. It can fit with the symptoms too…

-I'll do an echocardiography, Chase says.

-Why? What did the MRI show? House asks suddenly. He was standing on the threshold of the room since about 10 minutes and listened to his fellows, trying to decide which of their ideas would be worth to examine deeper.

-They are some diffuse nodules around the myocardium, Cameron answers.

-But she has also a granulomatous conjunctivis with concurrent swelling of the lymph node near the ear…, Taub adds.

-Let me see, House replies and nears Cuddy. To see her in a so bad state, suffering, hurts him, he tries to concentrate on the medical puzzle but he knows he's not objective. Taub and Thirteen, run blood tests to confirm the presence of Bartonella henselae and try to see if you find some sign of a lupus or of an endocarditis… Foreman make the echocardiography, Chase and Cameron do a biopsy of the myocardium in the setting of angiography… Go ! Run the tests I asked! I don't want to waste more time, she's in a hard pain! he almost shouts. Then he sits down on the chair near Cuddy's bed and holds her hand. She turns the head and stares at him.

-House, I… I want to… to tell you…

-Cuddy, I…

-House, if… if something happens to me…

-Everything's gonna be alright, Cuddy…

-House, let me end my sentence, if something happens to me… I… I want you to take care of Rachel… please, House, promise me you'll take care of her…

-Cuddy, I… are you sure? Last time you chose Julia and…

-It was last time as you say… Rachel always talks about you… as her dad… House, accept please…

-Do you think I can take care of her like a father would do?

-I… yes.

-Ok, I promise you, but she won't need me because her mother won't die…, he tries to be persuasive but …

-House, I heard your fellows, I heard their diagnosis, I know there are 50 chances I get better, but there are also 50 chances I…

-Cuddy, are you ready for the echocardiography and the biopsy? Foreman asks. She nods and gives House a last glance full of fear.

-Cuddles, do you want me to be by your side while they do the tests?

-House, you shouldn't…, Chase begins.

-No, Chase is right… But be by my side when I come back.

House nods, bents over her and kisses her softly.

A few minutes later, Wilson comes in. House leans against the window, he seems to be lost in his thought.

-House, I brought you some clothes… How is she? Have you a diagnosis?

-Yes, we have 2 or 3 hypothesis…

-Good or bad news?

-It depends…

-And what are…

-Cat scratch disease, lupus, endocarditis, myocarditis… or maybe we're wrong and … I don't know, Wilson.

-Where is she?

-With my team, they run some other tests.

-And… how do you feel?

-I… how do you think I feel, Wilson? House turns violently and yells at Wilson.

-I think you should go to take a shower and change your clothes, I'm gonna buy you something to eat… Wilson is about to leave when House says:

-Thanks, Wilson.

Wilson nods and leaves.

When he comes back, House has changed his clothes and waits for Cuddy and the results of her tests.

-Don't you have an office?

-Sure, but I prefer to stay here…

-Here's a sandwich and a bottle of water.

-Thanks.

-House, Cuddy is in intensive care, the biopsy went well but we prefer to keep her there for a few hours, Chase says. We should have the test results in one hour. House nods and leaves the room. He's tempted to swallow vicodin, but he made a promise to himself, for Cuddy: if he ever had another chance to be with her, to be happy with her, he won't take vicodin anymore… House hesitates and throws his bottle out. This time he won't make the same mistake, he'll prove Cuddy that he does care for her. Then he heads to the intensive care. Cuddy is sleeping, the nurse explains him that they gave her sleeping pills so she can rest a little. House looks at her, she's pale and looks drawn, she has lost weight… but even so he finds her beautiful.


	24. Chapter 24

_Chapter 24_

Sitting on her bed, watching her sleeping, House begins to whisper.

-Cuddy, I made things I regret, that you may… never forgive, never forget, but… I hope you'll give me another chance, you'll give US another chance… because … I cannot live without you, Lisa Cuddy, you're the only one who always gave me another chance, who always took my side and believed in me even when I doubted about myself … well maybe Wilson too, but not in the same way, I love Wilson of course but I love him like my best friend you know, I'm not gay, and House giggles slightly, he feels so ridiculous trying to make Cuddy smile whereas she sleeps and doesn't hear him. See what you make me do? I speak alone, I must look really stupid.

-No, you're not, House, Cuddy answers softly, opens her eyes and looks at him. I liked what you said, she adds with water in the eyes. A tear rolls on her cheek, House wipes it away tenderly.

-What did you hear exactly? He asks grinning.

-Do you really love Wilson? she asks teasingly.

-Hm, I … he's my best friend and I like him, that's all, nothing more.

-Really? Because you seemed to have strong feelings for him and… I was wondering if …

-Shut up Cuddy or you're gonna regret it, House replies and kisses her softly.

-House…

-Yeah?

-Do you really regret what you've done?

House looks at Cuddy straight in the eyes and says slowly: Cuddy! You know me! I'd never lie to you, he replies and raises an eyebrow.

-Where did I hear someone repeat like a mojo "everybody lies"?

-Oh really? Someone said that? Hm… I guess that's a wise person, don't you think?

-I'm sorry House if I hurt you, I …

-Shh, Cuddy, we can talk it later, you need to rest, he replies softly and caresses her cheek. Your tests results should be soon here, he adds and feels concern about her state. Does it hurt anymore?

-No, I'm fine, they gave me some morphine I guess… House nods.

-House, we need to talk, and you know it, so why not now? We have nothing else to do!

-Cuddy, I…

-House! Listen to me, please… she says in a low voice, with wet eyes. House doesn't say a word, he just remains still. I want you to know that I felt guilty, I knew I hurt you but… last time you were stoned when you came to me… Are you stoned right now? she asks and stares at him.

House stares at her a second, then he turns the head to the window. His eyes are full of pain, he didn't think Cuddy would ask him that. The second these words came out of her mouth, she regretted them, she saw she hurt House deep, but it was too late. A shot of pain went through House's heart, he didn't know what to say, how to react. It hurts of course because it shows that she still doesn't really trust him, or does she?

-House, I… I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…

-But you did… he replies, still watching at the window. He doesn't want to look at her, he's afraid of what he may see in her eyes. What if she really doesn't trust him? Could they have a future? And what if she finally thinks he's not worth it? Could he have been so stupid to believe that one more time she would give him, give them another chance? How many chances did he waste in the past?

-Last time you were… how could you imagine you could have helped me in such a state?

-But you didn't know it when I came to you, you understood it only when you were out of danger, safe, at your home… when we were sure you wouldn't die…

-House! What if I died! Would you have been able to take care of Rachel?

-It wasn't a problem at this time because you chose Julia to take care of her if something happened to you, don't you remember?

-That's not…

-Yes it is! It means that at this time you didn't trust me! You may even have thought there was no future for us! Cuddy looks at him frightened. She never thought it would hurt him that she chose Julia to take charge of Rachel, that he would interpret her choice like a proof of lack of trust in him, in them, in a possible common life.

-I… I thought you didn't want to be responsible for a child… You didn't really seem to …

-To what? To be interested in raising a child? Cuddy nods and stares at him. I admit that at the beginning, I considered her as a… burden, you never wanted to stay over at me because of her and… but with time I understood how much she meant to you and… so I tried to pay more attention to her, I coached her for the preschool… and I… I started to like her… we got on well together.

-I … I'm glad to hear it, House. I… I don't know what to say.

-If I took vicodin, it was only because I wanted to be with you to help you, I know it wasn't smart but… you know me… I… I always have trouble dealing with pain, with feelings, with relationships and… you might have died, Cuddy! My girlfriend, the woman I loved, the only human being who's able to make me happy, to make me feel better, might die and I should have been able to deal with this horrible thing alone, to face the possibility to lose you and all I won with you, to face the fear to be alone again, without the help of drug? I couldn't have been by your side to hold your hand and give you some peace, some comfort before your surgery if I haven't been stoned, with the vicodin I was able to "function", to play the role everybody was awaiting me to play, including you…

-You're right, and my subconscious tried to tell me that you couldn't get through this without drug… but if I want to be honest all that mattered to me when I thought I might die was that you were with me, I thought a lot about it, you can believe me, she says with a little, sad, bitter smile. What did it matter if you were stoned? You were at least with me, I wasn't alone…

-So why, Cuddy? Why did you dump me?

-I … I don't really know, House, I… I think I was afraid of what could happen if you couldn't face such problems without drug, I was scared, I thought I could never rely on you for important things… and I needed a man on whom to rely… I have a daughter, I'm responsible for her, I have to give her stability, care…

-And you think you can give her all this by being single or with a moron like the guy I saw in your dining room? Who are you fooling, Cuddy?

-Please, don't…

-Yes, I do! House says and gets up, begins to pace up and down in the room. You told me you weren't dating anyone, I came to you to apologize, to make amend and to see if we could start on square one because I didn't want to give up on you so easily Cuddy, and what did I see? A guy laughing at your side, you seemed to like him, you were flirting… it… it was disgusting… How do you think I felt then? How do you think I should have reacted? Should I have just gone away without fighting for you, for us, without showing you how much I cared about you, how much I longed for you, for a second chance? Tell me, Cuddy! Was it me? Was it the way you wanted me to react?

-House! I wasn't flirting with him! It was Julia's idea, she wanted me to get better, she wanted to help me to get over you, she introduced me to that guy and… that's why he was in my dining room, but we weren't alone, Julia and her husband were there too, I didn't really like him but I tried to get over you, I tried to forget you, I tried to move on… I… I didn't know anymore where I was, what I had to do, I was completely lost, House!

-And I felt so hurt, Cuddy! You can't imagine how deserted, how rejected I felt from the woman I loved! My whole world collapsed the evening you dumped me! Even vicodin wasn't able to soothe the pain I felt then. You broke my heart, but you broke my soul too.

-And don't you think I felt hurt too? Don't you think I felt betrayed by the man I loved?

Bibip bibip bibip bibip

-Cuddy!

-What happens? Chase and Taub exclaim as they come in the room.

-Nothing, she's just a little… tense, everything's ok, House replies and stares at Cuddy. Her face is inscrutable, House can't guess what she thinks, she looks at the window. Outside she gives the impression to be perfectly calm, but inside she struggles with the pain, the fear and the doubts. She waited this talk since the break up, she knew she should have talked to House, she knew she owed him an explanation about the break up, about her weird reactions, House was reluctant and she was too, they waited too long, they hurt each other deep, and now… ? Now they begin to talk, well more exactly they argue because that's just the way they are, they're two complicated people in love with each other but so "clumsy" when it comes to relationships! It shouldn't be so hard. They both know so well the other one; they both know deep in their heart that they're soul mates, that they're made for each other… Even Arlene saw it! She even tried to bring them back together, in a very personal and tricky manner but still…

-Do you have the result of the biopsy? House asks.

-Yes, it's a viral myocarditis probably due to Coxsackievirus B, Chase answers.

-Good, then give her digoxin and diuretics, with Milrinone followed by ACE inhibitors, House says, feeling better now they know what's wrong with Cuddy. And that's curable.

-And add to this special cocktail Azithromycin for the cat scratch disease, Thirteen says.

-What?

-Yes, she also suffers from it…

-That's explain the Parinaud's oculoglandular syndrome…, Taub adds, proud of him.

-Yeah, you were right, congrats, House replies sarcastically.

-So now we solved the case, what about having a drink all together? Chase suggests. They all approve of this idea, after all they are on vacation. House, do you come with us?

-I…, no, thank you, but my place is here with Cuddy. Enjoy your evening, guys.

After a while of silence, House, who leans against the window, finally turns to Cuddy and says:

-Cuddy, we… I'm not on drug… Do you still want to talk?

-House, I … I know I hurt you, I know I told you I wasn't dating anyone because when you asked me it was the case…

-You're sure? He replies and stares at her.

-Yes! This guy already approached me at the coffee shop but I told him he mistook me for someone else, I didn't want to date anyone… but you, House. I… I was stuck, House, I tried to move on, I tried to get over you, over us, but the reality was that I couldn't! The only thing I could think about was you and the huge void you left in my heart, in my life…

-So why, Cuddy? House says and nears her bed.

-I don't know! I told you I was scared!

-Of what, Cuddy?

-I… You were back on drugs, I thought you were probably back to the asshole you were which wasn't good for a kid, your leg was probably hurting like hell but you didn't open up to me, you never told me anything about you… It was a one-way relationship, House, it couldn't work, it couldn't last and you know it.

-Oh yes, that's true you opened up to me, I'm the only one who screwed it up, is that what you mean, Cuddy? Do you really think you were completely open to me, you told me everything?

-Yes, I…

-No, Cuddy, no! You let the things go worse and worse until you couldn't deal with it anymore, then you exploded and pushed me away for a while. How do you think I felt when you closed the door on me and refused me to come in and stay over with you?

Cuddy looks at House, but says nothing, her throat is too much squeezed to speak. House always knows how to hurt her badly with words.

-I felt hurt, but I tried to understand you, I tried to take it upon myself to improve my behavior because I loved you and I didn't want to lose you, I made compromise with myself. You had made me a worse doctor but I agreed, I chose you, I chose to be happy with you. And see the result! You dumped me!

-But you took vicodin, House, you took it to dumb you because you didn't want to share my pain and my fears, because you didn't want to involve you too much with me, you wanted to protect yourself because that's just the way you are… she replies with sobs in the voice. She feels tears rolling on her cheeks but she doesn't care. And I need and deserve someone who does care about me, someone ready to share my pain, my fears and my problems, but also someone ready to open up to me, to share his pain, his fears and his problems with me…

-… yeah, you're right, Cuddy. I took vicodin because without the help of the drug I couldn't stand the idea to lose you, to be left alone… But I also took it to be with you, to be able to look at you one more time, even if it could have been the last one…

-And now?

-Now? he looks at her, an eyebrow raised.

-Would you agree to open up to me? To share our fears, our pain? To definitely give up on drug?

-And you? Can you forgive me? Are you willing to talk to me about your fear to get involved with a man like me and with all it implies? Because that's it that scared you… Am I wrong?

They stare at each other silently, their eyes reflecting their strong feelings for each other, the desperate need of each other, but the fear to fail too.


	25. Chapter 25

_Chapter 25_

-Hm, someone would like to see you, Cuddy, Wilson says from the threshold of the room. And before Cuddy can ask who it was, a little girl runs to her bed, jumps on it and gives her a big hug.

-Mama!

-Hey Rachel, sweetie! How are you?

-Good! I missed you mama.

-Oh, I missed you too baby. But soon mommy will go out of there and we'll go to our new apartment, you'll have a big room, you will have new friends …

-And Daddy comes with us? Rachel asks and turns to House who stands near the window. He looks at her, then at Cuddy waiting for her to answer.

Cuddy looks at him a few seconds, then turns to Rachel: Listen to me sweetie, Daddy – she loves to say that from House… if only he could be Rachel's father… - Daddy has his own apartment and… I don't think he wants to leave it, and our home isn't big enough, and… it's… it's complicated.

-Ooh, Rachel seems to be very disappointed. She crosses her arms and begins to pout. You said we come here to be with Daddy.

Cuddy doesn't know what to say to comfort her. She looks at House to find some help, but he remains still.

-But maybe… later… Daddy will … come to live with … us, Cuddy finally says and stares at House. As she heard Cuddy's words, Rachel jumps from the bed and runs to House, wraps her little arms around his good leg, tightens it and looks at him in the eyes.

-Yes! Daddy, please, say yes!

House is surprised by Rachel's reaction, he doesn't want to disappoint her but he knows that he can't say yes either. He looks at Cuddy and raises an eyebrow meaning "what can I tell her now? Thanks for putting me in such a bad position!" I … I don't know, mushroom, as your mother said it's complicated, and…

-Daddy!

-Well, okay, maybe one day we'll live all together, House finally replies. Just to see Rachel's smile, House doesn't regret this white lie. He just wishes it can be true one day. He doesn't really know why and he feels a little weird about it but he's happy. However a second later, he's afraid of losing what he just won and wonders if he did the right thing by making Cuddy and Rachel come here. He thought they could take a new start all together but now… the doubts, the fear of a new failure plague him. Cuddy was watching him and she caught the subtle change in his eyes, she saw happiness and then fear, and she could have told what he was thinking and feeling at this moment. She knows him so well.

-Rachel, mommy is tired and it's already late, I think you should go with Wilson.

-Ok, mommy.

-Give mommy a big hug. See you tomorrow sweetie, be a good girl, listen to Uncle Wilson. Rachel nods and leaves with Wilson.

Cuddy and House are left alone. Everything is quiet. House stares at Cuddy, she seems to be exhausted and in pain.

-Does it hurt? House asks and nears her bed to check the morphine pump.

-No, it's ok, I'm fine.

-No you're not, Cuddles, he replies and raises her chin softly to look into her eyes. They are full of water. Cuddy… I know I'm not the one to ever let my feeling show and I'm not someone toward who people are naturally willing to talk, but…

-No you're not, House. Why don't you open up to me? Why do you refuse to talk about what you feel, about the pain in your leg, about what's eating you alive and make you think you're not worth it and don't deserve to be happy? Why, House? She replies softly, the tears rolling down her cheeks like a small river. House looks at her, he doesn't know what to say, he feels bad and oppressed, he'd love to be able to open up to her but he can't.

-Maybe I should …

Cuddy looks at him, he seems so fragile, he's broken and she knows it, she feels the need to protect him, to comfort him, to save him from his destructive himself. But how? She needs help herself.

-House, she says, I … I know you're hurt, I want to help you, but I can't if you don't open up to me, if you don't share your fears or your dreams with me. She speaks again after a while of silence, I love you, Gregory House, I love you since we met in the Med School, she says between two sob, and I know that I'm going to love you until the day I die. After a few minutes of silence, House asks jokingly:

-Do you remember the first look we exchanged?

-Yeah, I remember… How could she have forgotten these blue eyes? You were working at the library…

-And you came to take your books

-And you laughed at me, you said I was too ambitious and would cave under the challenge

-No, I didn't laugh at you! I found you arrogant and self confident but wonderful, interesting and … fascinating…

-Oh that's why you made fun of me instead of being a nice guy!

-But I was nice; and it was true your program was very ambitious! I just teased you but it wasn't spitefully! I just tried to draw your attention on me…

-And you got my attention…

-Yeah, you sent me packing! How funny!

-Oh, poor little boy! I didn't think you would take it personally, she replies with a wink.

-And the day after you sat next to me in the endocrinology class… it was… weird

-Just to … see you again… and to remind you of me… she adds teasingly with a seductive glance. In spite of your cynical side I found you attractive and fascinating

-I was the bad boy every girl dreamed of

-And I was a girl who liked partying and joking

-The beautiful girl from room 221 who drove a lot of students crazy with her jokes and her wonderful smile

-Really? I didn't know that

-Cuddles! Pretty little liar, you perfectly knew the effect you had on men at the time and you loved playing with the poor guys

-Hmm maybe, but honestly some of them were so stupid! I couldn't help laughing at them… and if I remembered well you were laughing at them with me

-Me? No, you're sure?

-Yeah! Did you remember Jack?

-Jack?

-We put a frog in his towel while he was in the shower and

-And when he took his towel the frog jumped on his face

-And he ran out of the bathroom naked and howling and everybody laughed

-And you shot him and showed the film at the next class

-We were evil… but it was so funny, she adds with a wonderful smile, that same smile that House missed so much, the smile that turned him upside down.

-And then there was this party…

-I was so excited about it

-About what? About the party?

-Yeah, I like dancing

-I thought you were excited because you knew I was going there, he replies and smiles.

-House! Don't be so self confident!

-And I was excited about it because I knew you would be there …

-Oh God! How could you be sure I would go to the party? I didn't tell anyone! I was ill the day before.

-I was sure because I saw you buying your dress early in the afternoon… Cuddy didn't expect that. She's speechless. House looks at her and smiles. I was a little afraid when you hesitated with the red one because it didn't fit you… he adds smirking.

-And what if I chose it? Wouldn't you then have danced with me?

-Hmm probably not.

-Are you kidding? Just because you didn't like my dress you would have given up on me!

-No, I wouldn't have…And I will never give up on you Cuddles, House replies and pushes a lock of hair behind her ear. They stare at each other a few seconds, lost in the eyes of the other one.

-And we danced the whole night

-And at the dawn I took you to my room

-And we made love

-And I gave you all you ever wanted

-And for this night you were always in my heart

-And you in mine

-And after all these years, after all we've been through, it finally happened and… and we screwed it up because … because I made the mistake to believe I could handle you and your addiction, I … I really thought I could do it, House, I didn't play with your heart, with your feelings for me…. Again she feels some tears rolling down her cheeks.

-Cuddy, I … please, don't cry, he replies and puts his arms around her shoulders, drawing her close to him. He tightens her tenderly and kisses her forehead. It wasn't your fault. I… I was so afraid to see how much I cared about you, how much I needed you and your love, I was afraid to lose you, to lose what we had… So I did what I always do in such case, I tried to protect myself over everybody else and I just managed to push you away, to make you angry at me, to hate me…

-No, House, I was certainly angry and infuriated, but I couldn't hate you… never…

-And now? Are you ready to share my life with all it implies? Because you know me Cuddy, you know I will probably do horrible things to you again. I'm an asshole, a jerk, a bad person…

-No you're not just that House, that's just one side of you… Unfortunately it's the only side you want to see in you, you always refuse to see the man ready to make his own life or carrier in danger just to save the life of a patient, the man ready to take the role of the bad guy to bring two brothers back together, the man who refuses to hide behind hypocrisy, the man who looks after the truth no matter the consequences, the man who organized complicated plan to give his girlfriend a great job opportunity so she and her kid come in a small city in the middle of nowhere just to be with them… and to give us the chance of a new start…. so yes, you're a pain in the ass, you can be a real jerk sometimes, but you're a generous and smart person too, and…

-Do you really think we can take a new start? Do you think that this time it can work?

-I don't know… I hope it will.

-Does it mean that you're ready to try it again? House asks smiling.

-I don't think I have the choice. House raises an eyebrow waiting for her to explain what she means. I resigned from my job at PPTH, I sold my house, I rent an apartment and have already paid 2 months in advance… she replies smiling and finally bursts out laughing.

-I didn't know you were so attached to material and trivial things, replies House ironic.

-The only reason why I'm here is that I'm in love with you House, I can't live without you, so I guess I have no other choice but live with you no matter what it implies… and don't get me wrong, it's not a sacrifice, I love you and I want to be with you even if some days will be hard, she adds with a wonderful smile. And what about you?

-Me?

-Yeah, are you willing to get back at me? To forgive me? To open up to me?

-If this implies sharing your bed and to be your toy boy then yes, House winks at her.

-That shouldn't be a problem… if you don't share only that.


End file.
